Can't Stand Alone ((Kael))

[Lynne Collins]

“He said that he came back for me.” Lynne remembered the sweet words Danny had told her upon his return and scoffed bitterly, blinking back tears. Hah. Danny hadn’t come back for her. It was just a pleasant coincidence that he had managed to break her heart as well. She wasn’t part of his past; that had been one thing that was not a lie. No, she hadn’t been in his past but only because he still needed her for something. He had wormed his way back into her heart, romanced her, kissed her and then abandoned her for someone who didn’t even want him. “Just how many lies did he tell me?” Lynne asked the distant stars in the sky, tipping her head back until her neck hurt. She had never expected the stars to answer, but it still hurt to be reminded that she was still alone, that there was no one to answer her pained questions. It was still bitterly cold and she didn’t have a jacket on, but Lynne wasn’t shivering with anything but repressed tears. “He promised not to leave again.” Her voice broke halfway through the sentence, the sentence that spoke of betrayal and a broken heart, but Lynne still refused to cry. The tears blurred her vision and threatened to spill over onto her cheeks but she had promised herself to never cry over him again, right? Danny had broken all of the promises he had ever made to her. Lynne didn’t think that she could survive yet another broken promise. So she wouldn’t cry over him. If she let herself cry over him, if she let herself shatter into pieces because he was gone and this time he was never going to come back and he would never love her even though she would have done anything for him, then she would never be able to fix herself.

A quiet voice said her name softly and Lynne shifted over slightly, offering her twin enough room to sit on the bench with her. “I hate him,” she told Kael, her voice hoarse and clogged with tears. “I hate him and I love him and I’ll never forgive him for either because I mean absolutely nothing to him.” She had meant something to him once. Once she had been Danny Lowell’s best friend and he had been hers. They had been content with just themselves and nothing could have torn them apart. Until that girl. That girl had stolen everything from her. Maybe she hadn’t meant to, but Adrina De Luca had stolen her love and and her brother. Danny had been returned to Lynne in pieces. Adrina and Russia had damaged him too much for her to heal him but she had tried anyway and he had dragged her down alongside him. When she thought of Danny – of the Danny he had been and of the Danny he had become – Lynne couldn’t help but to wonder exactly what warped monster Adrina would turn Kael into. After all, if sweet and adorable Danny could become so ruthless and uncaring then Kael, who already appeared to be so uncaring at times, would stand no chance against her.

A gentle hand pushed back some of her blonde hair and Lynne let out a quiet whimper of distress, curling into her brother’s side. As if that had been exactly the signal he had been waiting for, Kael covered her with a jacket before putting his arm around her. It was that simple, brotherly action that caused Lynne to break, the tears falling down her face without end as she wept into Kael’s shirt silently. Yet another promise broken; yet more tears shed for Danny. But that was okay. With Kael’s jacket covering her and his warmth chasing away the coldness of her skin, Lynne couldn’t help but to remember that Kael would always be there for her. She couldn’t lose herself in self-pitying imaginings of being alone, of having no one to hold her together as she cried hard enough to wonder when she would break.

When the tears stopped, Lynne raised her head but didn’t move away from the comforting weight of Kael’s arm. “I hate her,” Lynne hissed vindictively. She wouldn’t mention names, not while Kael was still dating the destructive Gryffindor lion, not when she still made him happy. Lynne hated Adrina but Kael was content with her at the moment and Lynne loved Kael more than she could ever hate Adrina. “She didn’t want him but she still couldn’t leave him alone. Why couldn’t she just be happy without tormenting him?” Lynne didn’t know how long she had cried for but, at least for now, she was free of the tears that had done nothing to cleanse the furious fire that burned inside her. Nothing would, except perhaps giving into the urge to hex Adrina beyond recognition for obliterating Lynne’s dreams of love and happily ever after but she didn’t want to even have to look at the other girl. Not when she had lost so spectacularly to her in every possible way. Not even years without being reminded of Danny everyday would make him fade completely from her mind. He was too deeply engraved in her soul. She had loved him for too long and wanted him for too long and now Lynne had a sneaking suspicion that she would hate him for too long to ever let go of him completely.

[kael]

Kael sighed, his hands clenching in his pockets before he forced them to relax. Hogwarts was an awkward place to be lately, when he had someone to avoid or be forced to nod at her courteously if they happened to cross paths. He had taken to skulking in the Hufflepuff common room even more so than he had previously, barely forcing himself out for classes and food. He hadn’t quite gotten around to telling Lynne yet. He would wait until the thought didn’t pain him so much before broaching the subject with his twin. After all, she had been so excited for him; Kael hated to be the one that stole the smile from Lynne’s face and he knew that her bright, lively smile would slowly dim with confusion and then fade completely when she grasped what he was trying to communicate to her. Supportively, at his side as always, Pluto mewed and butted his head against Kael’s leg before disappearing in the crowded corridor. Kael’s mouth opened to call the small cat back but closed soundlessly when he recognised the dark hair that belonged to the person Pluto had ambushed. Pluto was fond of Aurora – she probably spoiled him when Kael wasn’t looking, he grumbled silently – and she would look after him or dump him back in the boy’s dorms. “Oi.” Reluctantly, Kael hailed one of Lynne’s more annoying friends, eagerly striding away once he had the information he wanted: the location of his lighter and brighter sibling.

It was still hard, Kael mused as he stepped outside and shivered with the cold, to believe that Adrina had broken up with him. Well, it had been mutual, because he had agreed rather than start an argument. He had started to love her but not even that had kept him from nonchalantly accepting her decision. Even if it hadn’t meant being far too open with his feelings for her, Kael wouldn’t have kept her in the relationship if she wanted it to be over. He missed Adrina and he missed Gia and he regretted the knowledge that she now had to stand alone and in silence while Aria suffered but it wasn’t his place anymore. Perhaps it was for the best. As much as he had hated to admit it even to himself, Kael wasn’t ready to step in as a father-figure for Gia. Lynne and himself were enough for him to look after. Anyway, he had despised the knowledge that Danny was Gia’s biological father. If the girl had grown to resemble him then she would have been a constant reminder of the past. Kael’s nonchalance and reserved attitude only stretched so far. Maybe Adrina had sensed that somehow, or maybe his reluctance to let her and Lynne meet had made her feel insecure. Perhaps she was just tired of him. Did it matter? Teenage affection never lasted. He had been foolish to let himself think, even if for only a short while, that maybe it could. ‘Maybe’, as Kael was learning quickly, was one of the most annoying words in existence. It left too many things in uncertainty and, right now, instability was repulsive.

“Lynne,” Kael called her name insistently when he saw her, huddled on a cold bench and evidently upset. Grimacing but naturally inclined to oblige his sister, Kael sat on the cold stone and patiently waited. Pressuring Lynne when she was in such a mood never did anything to help; he had learnt that once more over the summer and it had caused her to pull away from him. He couldn’t afford to make the same mistake again when she was so distressed. When she did start talking, though, Kael’s eyebrow slowly rose disbelievingly. Lynne hated someone? No, wait, strike that. Lynne loved someone? And he had hurt her? His jaw clenched, holding back the spill of protective words and reassurances. Lynne still had more to say; she would never leave something so bare. Carefully, Kael shrugged out of his jacket, draping it over his few-minutes-younger sister and hugged her, lending her his own body-warmth to still her trembling body. He could hunt down whichever unfortunate fool had scorned Lynne later. Right now, Lynne needed his presence more than his violence. Later, Kael promised himself flintily. Later, nothing and no one would get in the way of his revenge. No one had the right to hurt his sister so. He simply wouldn’t allow it to pass unpunished.

When the tears soaked through his shirt, some surprise flickered in Kael’s brown eyes. Lynne had been crying so silently that he hadn’t even registered it. It was the way she had wanted it – it had to be when he knew that she was entirely capable of crying loudly enough to wake people from even the deepest of sleeps – so Kael merely smoothed his hand over her hair once more, noticing the unchanged strands with some wonder. Lynne had been emotionally injured so badly but none of her physical features represented any change whatsoever. Shouldn’t her hair be lighter or darker? Her eyes a different colour or her jaw line sharper? A scar, a tattoo, a visible mark, something that Kael could take steps to cover up and heal or change back to its original state.

Her? Now there was a girl involved? Sighing wearily but full of determination, Kael grasped Lynne’s shoulder gently and pulled her away from him so that he could meet her eyes. “Explain fully,” he demanded, his tone sharpened by displeasure of receiving half the story from the only person who, almost always, was the one to tell him the whole truth. There was doubt in her expressive green eyes but Kael waited patiently, sharpened instincts (instincts which only ever worked with his sister, it had to be said though that might have something to do with the fact that Kael cared for precious few and his sister had always been at the top of the short list) telling him that Lynne would not choose to keep this from him for long. After a few minutes, silence still prevailed but Kael merely lifted one shoulder in a shrug. He was no stranger to waiting. He had waited since the summer for the truth. A little while longer would do little harm. “Adrina and I broke up,” he told Lynne conversationally. “So while I’m evidently not as affected by the failure of a relationship as you seem to be, I do understand some of what you’re feeling. What I don’t understand,” Kael added softly, the disappointment in his tone being masked by concern, “is why you don’t trust me. Am I such a terrible brother?”