Tears and Rain ((Rosaliz))

[Ariane Chan]

Ariane twiddled her fingers as her gaze was riveted on the dormitory ceiling, intertwining them through each other laboriously, intent on losing not only her mind to daydreaming, but her fingers to tight knots. It was early in the morning, and she could hear the calling of birds outside as the sun began to rise and fill the skies with colour. Ariane had already been up for an hour, being her usual early self, and had even had breakfast long before anyone else had appeared. With a blank expression, she watched her dorm mates sleeping soundly around her, peaceful and serene, and Ariane felt a little envy well up inside her pained heart. Perhaps their lives weren’t perfect either, but Ariane didn’t understand something - why did they always look so happy and contented with life? Were they just lying and faking to keep others happy or did they truly lead wonderful lives?

Shaking her head furiously, letting her streaks of black fall to frame her pale face, Ariane propped herself up from her four poster bed, her arms leaning back to support her body. ”Enough of these thoughts.” Leaping lightly to the floor and carefully smoothing out the creases she had created in the duvet, she took one last brief glance at the other surrounding beds. Sometimes even being in this room Ariane felt like she was suffocating slowly, trapped with people she didn’t want to socialise with, never mind share a room with. ”I don’t need them. Let them live their ‘perfect’ lives.” Ariane thought finally, and silently exited her dormitory, glad to be away from the stuffy atmosphere of her room. Glad to be away from the people of her room.

Stuffing her slowly heat-deteriorating hands into her robe pockets, Ariane passed by the Gryffindor common room and through the rest of the large, almost empty school without much thought, her mind belonging to where it usually was. In her heart. Passing the door leading to the grounds, Ariane paused for once to stare out into the open through the misted glass windows. It was currently raining, the pitter-patter of noises thudding rhythmically against the ground. The rainfall was not particularly heavy, though it was enough to drench anything which got it its way of watering the earth. A small personal smile finally lifting itself onto Ariane’s usually stony face, she pushed open the door without any hesitation. The moment she stepped into the rain, she closed her eyes, letting her inhibitions fall away, leaking to lie beneath her along with the running water. Immediately Ariane’s robes began to get soaked, the wet spreading through her clothes as quickly as fire would. However, the fourth year student welcomed its entry into her personal territory.

Continuing to step through the grounds with a peaceful glaze in her dark eyes, Ariane savoured the feel of the raindrops against her skin, and threw her dripping hair back to stare at the sky. The clouds were grey and thunderous-looking, and the dull sky could barely be made out. Sweeping her gaze over the heavens, Ariane felt tears prick at her eyes, the rain provoking its usual memories, though no one would have been any the wiser had she let the tears fall, as they would have joined as one with the rain gathering on her cheeks. However, Ariane pushed her sadness down with terror, refusing to let such an emotion control her, and she turned from the sky to glare angrily into the distance. ”I can’t cry. I will not cry. I have to be strong. I have to be strong for Harmony. I’m not that weak.” Grinding her fists into shaking balls, Ariane stood motionlessly in the pouring weather, a still statue devoid of life.

Five minutes later, a medium-sized black-feathered owl suddenly swooped low in the raining sky, heading straight for Ariane’s figure. Her eyes turned fixedly to the stony ground, Ariane barely sensed its presence until it landed gracefully on her cold shoulder. Bearing down her surprise, Ariane raised her head to look her pet owl in its golden eyes with a pleased expression. “Hello Atala.” The Gryffindor murmured softly through her thin cold lips, and let a numb hand rest onto her warm back, ruffling her slightly wet feathers with a gentleness Ariane rarely portrayed. Watching her owl incline her head to hers with what seemed to be a questioning gaze, Ariane sighed heavily and turned away to glance blankly into the distance again. “I know. I shouldn’t shoulder so many burdens, but… I’m strong enough, Atala. I am. I know I am. I can push myself. I’m not at my limit just yet… Harmony needs me.” Ariane whispered against the frosty wind, feeling the temperatures begin to gradually rise as the rainfall dimmed a little.

After another fives minutes or so, the rain had completely drizzled out, leaving very wet-through grounds and a sopping Ariane and her loyal owl perched on her shoulder. Her robes were dripping continuously from having taken in so much water, but Ariane ignored this fact. She watched with a blank expression on her face as the clouds cleared to let a brilliant shining sun through, its rays piercing Ariane’s damp and cold skin. Giving a low hoot, Atalanta stared at her mistress once more before leaping off her shoulder, disappearing into the distance, most probably returning to the Owlery to have a good sleep. A small smile ignited in Ariane’s heart, though it chose not to make an appearance on her damp face. ”Thank you.”

Suddenly noticing something she had earlier failed to discover, Ariane spun around to glimpse a figure standing a way off, looking in her direction. However, whether or not the girl was looking at her Ariane could not decipher. Disgruntled that someone else had breached her space, Ariane began to stalk gingerly back through the soppy grounds, her annoyance hidden within her. Nearing the other person, Ariane ran her cold eyes down her long blonde hair and Gryffindor robes, before concluding she was a third year student, one that she recognised too. Ignoring her presence which was now considerably nearer, Ariane took a position down by a tree close by, and rested her wet head against the dry bark, disregarding the girl’s stares. So what if she was a sight for sore eyes? Ariane could care less right now. All she wanted was a little more solitude wrapped in her rain soaked clothes before heading to her first lesson. Hopefully the little nuisance would leave sooner or later. Ariane hated company.

[Rosaliz Hernandez G6]

It was pitch black in the bedroom as Rosaliz layed wide-awake. She turned her head and looked out the window not to far from her bed. She sat up slowly slipping her blanket off her body, putting on her shoes and socks she went to the foot of her bed. Then opening her chest she went to the bottom and found her wand. With a small flick the blankets on her bed rose as they would if someone was sleeping under them. Then kneeling down by the window Rosaliz looked at the grounds. They were vacant just the way she expected it to be. It was nearly midnight Turning back towards the door, into the common room and then snuck out of the passageway. She walked threw the halls, not caring if she made any noise and was willing to stand-up to anybody if they asked what she was doing. Rosaliz made it to the front doors without being caught. She stepped outside. The air had an aroma of newly fresh cut grass. She loved that smell, which seemed quit usual to her. She looked around. The lawn seemed so peaceful and soundless with out any students around. She walked to her favorite spot. It was an oak tree. She took another breath of fresh air glaring at the lake that had glimmered before her.

She walked out taking a deep breath of fresh air. After a couple of hours, Rosaliz had watched the crack of dawn and now was currently walking around in such horrible weather that the new day had brought. Rosaliz’s arms were wrapped tight around her, books held close to her chest. She sniffled a bit, biting back a sneeze. Ever since she had arrived at Hogwarts, she had been getting increasingly sick. She blamed the weather here. The cold, murky climate of that place made her sick. It was probably a matter of time before people she spent time around with a lot got sick as well. Though, her skin was a lot paler, and her nose was a bright pink. As if resembled a distant cousin of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. Rosaliz looked pretty natural, not to spiffed up, but today she looked terrible. Like she literally been through hell. She had a pounding headache and lingering nausea. Her face was as white as a sheet of paper. She felt cold and miserable. She hadn't gone to breakfast, which had been a couple hours ago. And being outside in this horrible weather wasn’t making anything better. She just didn’t want to be inside near people she didn’t know or didn’t have any interest into getting to know them.

But it didn't matter now. She had been whipped by a cold icy wind along with icy raindrops pinging against her face. She walked on the wet grass. Her mind kept playing the scene over and over again. Thinking about it sent a shiver down her spine. Her eyes crossed in the painful memory. She stood there and letter the rain roll down her neck and shoulder. Quietly she began to cry leaning, on a tree trunk with her eyes closed against the splashing water. She felt as if her mind had been bleeding with pain and her body felt she had fallen on rocks, again and again, and again. Once more she had opened her eyes. “Stop acting like a baby” she thought. Sighing of the hunger she had she spotted a figure across the grounds. Rosaliz out of curiosity made her way towards it. Hoping to find at least something to do.

((writers block))

[Ariane Chan]

Ariane bowed her head into her knees as she sat in her usual position by the tree, wrapping cold arms around herself in a weak defence. Her longing for solitude was great, yet how could she be alone when a stranger was standing literally right next to her? Ariane refrained from grunting in disapproval, before inclining her eyes round slowly to glance at the third year out of the corner of her vision. She wasn’t curious, but merely Ariane wanted to see who it was that was ruining her privacy. She wasn’t going to hold it against the girl, because Ariane often had this problem: she could never find solitude in the Grounds, since it was always occupied by the other students, who also shared Hogwarts with her. It was not Ariane’s place to penalise anyone, but since it was very early, and the weather had been rather heavy, she had doubted that any student would have been as rash and stupid as her to rush into the rain willingly. The drizzle had only just stopped, so Ariane was indeed interested to know who else joined her at such a time.

Inspecting the shorter, younger girl, Ariane ran dark eyes over wet blonde hair, a lot like hers, straight and dripping with rainwater, but longer and several shades lighter, of course. She noticed that this girl had also been caught in the weather, though wondered if she had chosen to do so or if it had been accidental. Peering closer, trying not to look as though she was staring rudely, Ariane gazed thoughtfully at her pale face, and with a blink registered that she had been crying. She was sure of it. Although one would have merely said the Gryffindor’s face was wet from precipitation, Ariane noted with expertise and knowledge the typical pale red marks that streaked her cheeks, the slight bloodshot pupils of the student’s pale eyes, so very different to Ariane’s mahogany irises. There was no mistaking the usual marks that crying left, because Ariane had seen many people break down, had witnessed too much pain herself.

Glancing away quickly because she knew she had been staring a little too much, Ariane let her hands cover her eyes as she closed them wearily, leaning into her legs for support rather than bending backwards against the moist bark of the tree. Sighing inaudibly to herself, Ariane questioned why she was sitting here so early in the morning, wet through and alone (well, not so alone). What was the point of life? What was the point of existence besides living for your loved ones? Ariane had never, ever breathed a single breath for herself. She was a selfless creature for her friends and family once you got to know her well enough, and that only applied to a handful of people. Ariane couldn’t even count the amount of people she trusted in her life on one hand, and this included people from the past. There was, of course, Harmony, her mother, and Aurora, her best friend. They were currently the only ones she would die for willingly. Her Aunt Vanessa could probably be added into the equation, because Ariane was very grateful to her; she had helped rebuild their shattering lives, and gotten Lorraine back on her feet to care for her children.

Then there was the one person from the past that she had once loved with all her heart, then grew to despise and hate with a passion. Namely, her father. God, Ariane detested the man to her very core. He was an evil being, Satan reborn on this world. Perhaps she was over exaggerating his bad qualities because she was biased, but to her, that was what he was. The devil. Ruined her life and her mother’s, and Harmony’s. Henry brought nothing but pain and sadness, so why couldn’t Ariane think of him as nothing but pure evil? He was the only one Ariane had ever loved that she hated so much now. She had never bore any affection for her grandparents, since the Chans loathed their presence, and Lorraine’s parents had died before her birth. Ariane’s cousins on her father’s side, whom she and lived with for almost half her life, had always sentenced Harmony and her to lives worthy of outcasts, subjecting them to eyeballing abuse, though no words ever passed between them. And finally, the only close relatives left were the aunts and uncles, parents of the children who scorned Ariane and her family from within. Their disgust was obvious, because they knew she and Harmony were the only ones who had retained the magical blood.

Ariane refocused her eyes as she let them flutter open after a short while, intent on not remembering the familiar images in her head, didn’t want to witness those horrible faces over and over again. Raising a hand to push her damp hair out of her face, she suddenly turned around to the third year Gryffindor, eyes and visage quickly suppressing all expression she had earlier held in her hands. “Are you okay?” She asked with a flat tone. Ariane hated conversations and interactions with strangers. She hated making new friends too. But her compassion for others always brought her to make a move sometimes anyway, hence why, although she was asking a caring question, and although she was rather concerned for this girl, she never showed it visibly. Ariane was adamant her emotions stayed within her. “You’ve been crying.” Ariane stated formally with a steady stare on the girl.

((I apologise for the delay in replying and the lengthy post. Most of it is drabble anyway. I hope that gives you sufficient information to reply to, because Ariane is so hard to roleplay with since she rarely talks!))

[Rosaliz Hernandez G6]

Rosaliz looked back at the girl who had been apparently looking at her for a bit of minutes. She had then asked if she was okay and how she noticed she had been crying. Yes. Rosaliz was sure of it she did have a problem in keeping her emotions inside. Was it that she had been rattled so much in the past that she had become completely unstable? Well, it didn’t matter know. The past had been done but the hard part was living through it. She had a difficulty through this struggling all the time. Rosaliz wondered if this girl had understood what kind of pain she had been through, or had she heard and seen traumatic experiences that other people had gone through. Would she understand? Well then again she didn’t know this girl ad it didn’t mean that she was going to tell her everything of her private life. Now that wouldn’t make any sense at all. But then again there does come a time you linger to talk to somebody and nobody is there and you surely don’t want to talk to yourself of course.

Rosaliz looked at this girl. Question and thoughts started coming to her mind. Why was this girl her. Was it just that she wanted some fresh air? Or was there a bigger motive behind it? How was she? Where did she come from? Did she ever lose a love one? Did she ever felt pain? These questions did come up. Rosaliz wasn’t the nosy types. But at times curiosity spilled in here and there. But what could she do? Nothing. Nothing at all. Just like everything, she never had any control over anything, not even her own life. Nor, did she know how to get control. Was it because of her age? Her past? Or maybe something obvious, like the fact she is a girl. She didn’t know the answer she didn’t want to know the reason why. She just wanted to know how. Was how to control it. What decisions does she have to make? Would she risk her self and open herself up to this new girl? Is it destiny? Or is this girl going to ignore her, of bully her or anything else pertaining that area? Or will this girl talk to her? Will she say a word? Talk about her dreams and future. Or be straightforward and say to leave and not care a bit. Will she end up with another person who may forget her and move on and not even remember she met her this morning? And she was just a little girl who crying.

Rosaliz truly didn’t know. All she knew that she was feeling not so well. Well even when she came back to Hogwarts things weren’t so well and still hasn’t cleared up from then. Was it her fault? She didn’t know. All she knew what pain felt, heard, and smelled like. How it engraves into one’s mind and doesn’t seem to come out. And how everybody may say, in time you’ll heal. Apparently that hasn’t been working out for her. As time progresses she gets into a pain. How one problem piles on top of another and keeps going on as a cycle. Rosaliz bit her lip. She noticed that more tears had been flushing down her face. How embarrassed she felt. She couldn’t believe she couldn’t stop crying. The girl might have thought that she was a baby. But Rosaliz couldn’t keep it bottled up inside. It was way too much. What could she do? It only meant to take the risk. So she replied to this girl “I’ve been crying, and I’m not okay.”

((Not so great ))

[Ariane Chan]

Ariane almost rolled her eyes at the answer she received, but had enough consideration not to in the face of this girl. Admittedly it would have been rather rude, and she wasn’t that mean despite her cold exterior. What kind of an explanation was that though? Yes, Ariane had certainly figured out that she had been crying, it wasn’t exactly hard to decipher. And of course she wasn’t okay, that much was obvious too. Ariane wasn’t stupid. “Why aren’t you okay?” She asked her companion in a quiet tone of voice, making a futile attempt at normal conversation. Why was Ariane bothering again?

Ariane wondered inwardly whether this girl had lost a close friend or family member; perhaps something drastic had happened in her life. But it was also possible it was something much less trivial, maybe an argument with someone, or a bad mark received in homework. It wasn’t unlike Professor Snape to send a student bursting into tears, Ariane almost smiled wryly. She was surprised that Harmony hadn’t given up on Potions yet; the poor thing was absolutely terrified of Snape. Ariane wasn’t so timid; the man certainly did not scare her in the slightest, but she was forced to politely obey him, because he was at the end of the day, her teacher and her superior. Ariane rolled her eyes to herself. Respecting peers. Pffh.

Back to the girl. Ariane glanced over again at her companion, wondering if she would ever talk. She didn’t expect her to open up or anything; they were complete strangers. But she could at least reply. Ariane felt the inkling to help even in the smallest way, despite her rule of not getting too close to anybody. It was her nature to be compassionate, unfortunately, and it sometimes got in the way of her cold and uncaring exterior. Sighing noiselessly, Ariane gave into her inner angels, and decided to introduce herself to this girl. Maybe that would induce unwanted conversation, she grimaced privately. “I’m Ariane Chan, by the way.” Ariane spoke up with an expressionless voice, eyes staring out over the scenery again. “Fifth year. And you are?”

((Sorry it's so much shorter than the others; writer's block.))