What are you, crazy? ((Carr))

[wendi]

“No, no don’t worry about me Jame, I’ll be fine.” Wendi said hugging her brother as they walked to the carriages to Hogsmeade. Jamison laughed. “C’mon Wend. I’m a brother. That’s what we do. Let me worry.” He said smiling. Wendi hit him playfully in the head. “It’s just for a month plus, you like Carr.” Wendi said pulling her suitcase along beside her and stumbling a bit. Jamison nodded. “Yea, but we’ve never been apart over the summer before. Plus, I don’t know his dad or anything..” Wendi sighed. “Jami! Chill. Get out of father mode and remember that I’m not a baby anymore, k?” He nodded. “Yea, I know. But, I’ve missed you kid and now your going to Birmingham.” He said sighing. Wendi smiled and latched on to his stomach in another hug. “Aww, cheer up boy. You’re seventeen now. I’m only a ‘pop’ a way.” She said laughing. Jamison nodded. “Fine. Silly girl.” He said ruffling her hair a bit. “Hey!” Wendi called as Jami began jogging ahead of her. “No fair Jami!” Wendi said running after her brother playfully. “Get over it kid!” He joked still running through the wooded area. “Jami!” Wendi chased after him.

“Okay, so I’ll be back in a month and I’ll write.” Wendi told Jami from the train station. He nodded. “Seriously, do you have to go?” He asked. Wendi smiled and nodded. “Come on Jame. Carr’s my friend. I trust him. You trust him. What’s the prob?” She asked with her hands on her hips just like she did when she was younger. He laughed in response. “Are you too old for that?” He raised an eyebrow. “Aren’t you too old to care?” She asked in response. He shook his head. “Never, little sister. Never.” She laughed back to him. “Look, I’ll have fun, take care of his siblings with him, and bring you back candy. Deal?” She asked smiling and awaiting an answer. Wendi then stuck out her hand. “Deal.” He said smiling and shaking her hand like a business man. “What now?” Jami asked looking around. “What now?” Wendi said mockingly. “You go find Meyghan and get off my back that’s what’s now.” Wendi said smiling. He sighed embracing her in a hug. “See you in a month.” He said trying to act casual. “You bet.” Wendi said smiling and then running off to find Carr. Jamison shook his head and headed in the opposite direction as Wendi.

Wendi searched the halls for the familiar sight of blond hair. But, she didn’t see a thing. She sighed tracing her way up and now the train. “Where is that McDuff boy?” She asked herself out loud. “Back here!” Wendi heard someone yelling to her at the back of the train. She smiled at the flash of blond hair that then had emerged back into the carriage. Wendi shook her head and smiled. “What am I supposed to do with you CarrDuff?” She muttered to herself as she made her way to the back of the train. She shook her head at the sight of Carr by the window as she entered the compartment and closed the door. “Crazy boy, since when did we agree on the back of the train?” Wendi asked. “You truly are insane, you know that?” Wendi asked placing her bag on one seat and then taking a seat by Carr. Carr didn’t say a word. He just stared at the blond headed girl in bewilderment and awe. He sat there beaming. “You keep it up and I think Jami really will force me to go home. He’s the most protective thing on the face of the planet.” She said rambling. Carr continued to be silent and smiled. “I think he thinks you’re crazy and sometimes I believe him. And you know what..” Wendi couldn’t speak anymore. All the rambling had ceased. Because, she had been silenced by Carr’s lips on hers. What was he doing? What was she doing? Her first kiss with Carr McDuff? But, Wendi couldn’t help but kiss him back. She really didn’t know what to do. So, she just kissed him. She just kissed Carr McDuff. After only a few seconds, she regained her brain and pulled away. Her face sat inches away from his. She stared blankly into his eyes. She couldn’t find the words to say. She would be lying if she said that she didn’t like it. Finally, she shook her head and stopped her fixation at looking into his eyes. “What are you, crazy?” She shrieked finally.

[carr]

Wendi. It was Wendi. Carr could get a ton of different girls, but he didn’t want any of them. The only girl that he had ever wanted was Wendi. So, why did it take until now for him to figure this all out? Carr had no clue. This was crazy even for him and he knew it. But, he couldn’t stop thinking about her. Wendi was his best-friend. His best-friend! How could he feel this way about her? Why did he feel this way about her? There was no sense explaining it. He just did. He simply liked Wendi. Wait, simply? Nothing about Wendi Eden-Grace Parson was simple. She didn’t have parents, she had a loving yet completely protective brother, an uncle who clearly wanted to kidnap her, and yet she was perfect. She wasn’t simple, but she was perfect. She was perfect when she kept rambling and rambling. She was perfect the way she sort of snorted when she laughed which was constantly. She was just perfect! “Ahh Carr get a grip!” He screamed in his dorm causing his dorm mates heads to turn. “Oh, I just can’t hold on to the tooth paste.” He said grinning. One of them laughed. “Ha, still in love with Wendi, eh?” All the other boys laughed. Carr sighed and threw a pillow at his dorm mate. He finally nodded. “Yea, pretty much.” The entire room started laughing so Carr gave in and laughed with them.

This is crazy, insane even. Carr sighed as he carried his bag to the train station. Some things were just unexplainable. It was as simple as that. Carr sighed. Why did he have to like his best-friend? Why Wendi. Besides the fact that Wendi was two years younger then him, Carr couldn’t have a relationship with his best-friend. She was too young. Wasn’t she. Well, she was thirteen. Was that too young? Carr sighed thinking about it. Actually, Wendi would be turning fourteen in less than a month. Carr would be turning sixteen only five days after Wendi turned fourteen. They were only five days apart birthday wise. Carr laid his hands on his forehead. They almost exactly two years apart in age. Was that too much? Carr sighed. Ahh! Why was this happening? Why did he like Wendi? What was he going to do about it? What was he supposed to do about it? He could make a move on Wendi, could he? Carr shook his head as he made his way on to the train. Well, he did have awhile to think about this. After all, Wendi would be staying at the McDuff mansion for a month. So he didn’t have to do anything about his feelings now, right?

Carr had taken a seat in one of the last compartments on the train. He sat silently waiting for Wendi. As he stared out the un-moving window, he couldn’t help but think. Think about everything. He sighed. Why did he have to feel this way now? Carr had always been the jokester, the flirt. He had never felt seriously about one girl until Wendi. Besides, Wendi being an awesome companion, she had grown up over the past few months. Growing up was something Carr used to say that he never wanted to do. But. He sort of had. He wouldn’t admit it to himself though. And he knew that Wendi had grown up. Yep, he had watched her transform over the past few months. But all and all, she was still Wendi. She was still the perfectly innocent girl with the perfectly complicated life. Carr smiled thinking of her. He then glanced down at his watch and noticed that she should be arriving around now. He smiled peering his head through the door and catching a glimpse of curly blond hair. “Back here!” He screamed and then went back in the compartment waiting for her to join him.

Carr laughed as Wendi came in and sat down, babbling all the way like normal. But, he didn’t say a word. No, he just eyed her in bewilderment. With that look on his face. That look that said it all. But, Wendi was too naïve to notice. He just stared at her and her beautiful eyes as he talked. He could do this. He could wait. Wait, no. No he couldn’t. Finally he gave in. He reached over and kissed her. It felt right, it felt right. For a moment, she kissed back, and then she pulled away. Carr eyed her. “What are you, crazy?” She asked. Carr nodded after a second. “Most would say that, yes.” He said smiling. Wendi then stood up and stared pacing. She didn’t say anything though. Carr stood up. “C’mon Wendi. What’s so wrong about this? You know it felt right.” He said sternly. Wendi just shook her head still pacing as she lifted her hand to her eyes. “Why now?” She asked out of the blue. He paused knowing what would come out of his mouth next was totally un-manly. “Because you’re perfect.”

[wendi]

Wendi couldn’t help but pace back and fourth in the compartment. She just walked and shook her head over and over. Why this? Why now? It was just so confusing. Wendi just needed to think. Think! It made sense, it did. Her and Carr seemed like a no brainer, they always had. He was always there when she needed him no matter what and he always knew exactly what to say. True, he was a bit crazy at times, but that was Carr. That was the way he was. Wendi shook slightly as she paced. It was just all out of the blue. Out of nowhere. Where had this come from? Why did Carr decide now? He didn’t have the best timing. Wendi had just finished her third year and she had just started talking to her big brother. True, Keith seemed to be gone, but that was only for the time being. Wendi could never be sure if he would turn up again or not. She couldn’t do this now! She couldn’t. Could she? Wendi shook her head slightly. She would be lying if she said that she didn’t like Carr because she did. She had for awhile. But, it couldn’t happen. Right?

Wendi continued pacing, but she still couldn’t look him in the eye. She just kept pacing back and forth. “Why now?” She finally asked. She stopped pacing at his response which nearly brought her to tears. Why was she so confused by this? Why was this so hard? Why couldn’t she simply choose? Finally, turned and looked him straight in the eyes. She started to wipe the tears from her eyes. She sighed. “It might feel right, but it can’t be right. We have to be wrong, this can’t be real.” She said as more tears began to fall. She stared at the ground and then back at Carr. He just eyed her in awe, understanding her tears, but wishing that they would go away. Finally, Wendi took a seat across from Carr by the window. She stared blankly out of it for a moment. Then, looked at him again. Then, looked away. It had already hit Wendi that this was real and that Carr meant it. It had already hit her that he cared for her a great deal and they could be happy together. But, happy scared her. Happy scared her.

Finally, Wendi looked him in the eyes and kept her glance there. “I’m scared.” She said simply. She was about to continue, but Carr just put his hand to her lips. He shook his head calmly. Wendi was close to biting his hand and speaking, but she stopped herself. Finally, she took a deep breath, and calmed down. Carr always knew how to calm her. He knew what would make her feel better even if Wendi didn’t know herself. Which most of the time, she didn’t. Carr smiled at her quietly as he removed his hand from her mouth. She just sat there and took deep breaths as not to say anything that she didn’t mean. She wanted to say the truth. Finally, Wendi couldn’t stand the silence. She couldn’t stand the empty space in the air. “Say something!” She finally blurted out.

[carr]

Carr watched Wendi pace and in all truthfulness; it was a very Wendi-like reaction. He didn’t expect anything less that the way Wendi was acting now. Carr knew her. He knew her personality, he knew her fears. He knew Wendi. That was a part of the reason why he cared for her so much. He cared for Wendi and he liked her, he really, really did. He couldn’t help but care for Wendi. He had been with her through some tough times over the past few months. He had gotten so closed to her to the point that he realized, that he was never get over it if he lost her. He wanted to be with her always. But, he couldn’t tell her this. Wendi had grown up, but not to the point that she could hear this. No, that part of the conversation would have to wait. Right now, he just wanted her to understand. He wanted them to be together besides best-friends. But, he always wanted to be best-friends. Could they do both? Could they do anything? Why was it all up in the air? Why?

Carr listened intently as Wendi finally spoke. He listened to all of her thoughts, her fears. He bit his lip when she said that it felt like it was right, but it couldn’t be. Was she right? But, Carr didn’t say anything. He knew Wendi. He had to give her time. And when she was scared, Carr knew she meant it. And truthfully, he was a bit scared himself. But, Wendi’s whole life was complicated. Her whole life was a maze of mysteries. And this was just another unsure thing to add to the maze. Carr knew all of this. He knew why she was scared. Right now, she had a lot going on. Keith was back in her life trying to take over yet again and she and Jami had just made up and she was already leaving him for a month. He hated the sight of tears in her eyes. He knew this would affect her, but why was she so broken up? Why did she have to cry? He hated it when she cried. He hated seeing her cry, because it was the only thing he couldn’t make better. He couldn’t make the tears go away. He hated seeing her like this.

Carr covered her mouth as she tried to speak more. If she continued, she would have a panic attack. She just needed to breathe. Carr didn’t know why he knew Wendi so well, but he just did. He just knew so much about her without having to try too hard. Wendi came easy to him. When she had calmed down, he removed his hand and she didn’t say anything for awhile. Finally, she just blurted something out. Carr smiled a tad and took a deep breath. “It can be right, we aren’t wrong and it is real. Wendi don’t go ruin the one thing you know is right.” He said for once not joking and being completely honest. “You know this is right and I wouldn’t have kissed you if I didn’t think it was right. I mean Wendi, you are two years younger than me. You’re thirteen years old.” He said truthfully. “If I wasn’t crazy about you then I wouldn’t do this to a thirteen year old. I care about you and I’m not going to hurt you. Don’t be scared to let yourself be happy because you know you can be.” He paused. “Don’t be scared and just trust me.” He said finally. Carr waited to see what Wendi had to say.

[wendi]

Wendi watched Carr with big tears looming in her eyes. She knew he meant it. She knew he cared. But, that didn’t make it any easier. Wendi had never kissed anyone until now. She had never dated anyone. She was thirteen for heaven’s sake! This was weird. This was confusing. But, it made sense. Wendi and Carr together made perfect sense. It just did. Wendi had never met someone who knew her this well besides Jamison. Carr knew what Wendi was thinking, how she felt. It was crazy, but it was real. Wendi listened to what he had to say. He was right. Why did he have to be right? He was always right. Carr could be crazy sometimes, but that was who he was. This was a different side of him, but a good one. Wendi knew he was telling the truth, but a part of her just wanted to hold back. She was scared and she would be lying if she said she wasn’t scared. She was too young for this, right? Well, if she was then why did it feel right? Why was it right? Wendi shook her head slightly. She just kept asking the same questions over and over in her head, but that didn’t make anything better. It didn’t help. It just made her crazy in her head.

Wendi didn’t know what to say. What could she say? Finally, she looked at him square in the eyes. “I can’t.” She said finally. “I can’t. I..” She looked at him. She stared at his perfectly blue eyes. She gave up. She couldn’t say anything else. She couldn’t make any more sense of it. Wendi got up, and sat next to Carr. And kissed him. It was only her second kiss ever but she knew what to do. She knew that this was right. She knew he was right. Yes, Wendi was only thirteen years old, but Carr was right for her. She knew it. She pulled away after a few moments. Carr merely watched her in amazement. Wendi smiled a bit. She sighed and let another tear fall. “I wanna be happy. But, being happy scares me. This scares me. Everything scares me, but it feels right. And it is right.” She cried. Carr gently pushed her head to his chest and let her cry into him. She just let everything out. Her thoughts, her worries were all in the tears. And that was the best she could do. That was all she could do.

Wendi finally pulled away. Her tears were stopping by the moment, but she couldn’t bring herself to say anything. She had told him the truth, the whole truth. What was she supposed to say now? She didn’t know what to say. She didn’t know how this worked. It was all still so clogged in her mind. She smiled slightly looking at her best-friend with her little kid eyes. “Now what?” She asked shrugging her shoulders. She had told him everything and she had meant it all, but now what? Wendi was thirteen and had fallen for her best-friend who had fallen back. Now what was the only question that seemed to make sense. Wendi sighed as he reached for her hands. She smiled slightly waiting for him to make sense of it all. To help her make sense of it all. To help this make sense.

[carr]

Carr watched Wendi. For a moment, he wished that he didn’t kiss her because he hated the look on her face. A part of him hated that her complicated her life more. But, it was the right thing to do. Telling her the truth was the right thing to do because they were right. Wendi knew it, she was just having a hard time living it. He wished that this wasn’t such a hard thing for her, but it made sense. Not one thing about Wendi’s life had ever been simple. She lost her parents before she could talk. Her brother left her for school when she was too young to understand it and her uncle kept going after her in what ever way he could. It was safe to say that in a way, Carr was now regretting his decision. He wished it could be easier. But, life wasn’t easy. He wished that this wouldn’t bother her so much, but it did. Carr sighed. He could only think of what Jamison would think of this. He would probably tear Carr a part. But then again, Carr knew this when he kissed Wendi. Nothing had changed since then. He looked her over waiting for her to say something. Anything.

Finally, she did. But, what she said didn’t exactly make Carr happy at first. But, he knew her. Wendi wouldn’t leave things like that she wouldn’t..And she kissed him. She kissed him. Carr couldn’t help but kiss her back and he found himself smiling a tad as she pulled away. What did this mean? What did she mean by that? He was a bit confused to say the least. Great now Jami’s really gonna kill me. Carr thought silently. Still, he didn't say anything. This would affect Wendi because she probably didn't realize what she was doing until she did it. Carr knew this. He just watched her for a moment. The next things she said made carr smile a tad. It was right. He loved hearing her say that. He loved hearing it come out of her and not him. Carr smiled. She meant it. He knew she did. Carr still sat silently. He wante dto talk so bad, but he couldn't. He couldn't say a word.

Finally when she asked what now, he had to say something. He looked to her, smile his loving smile, and took one of her hands in to his two. "Now we go to Birmingham." He said smiling his goofy grin. She took her hand from his and hit him playfully on the shoulder. "Shut up." She said looking stern and then grinning. "Well, we do." He continued. "We go to Birmingham and stay at my house and see where this leads. We'll take our time and see where it goes." He paused. "Does that sound good?" He asked. Wendi leaned in to him and put her hand on his again. "Very good." She said smiling and looking out the window. Carr smiled letting his trance go to the window as well. "Good." He said smilig a tad loving the fact that her hand was on his.