Dear Mack

[Jack Rendel S5]

Mack,

I haven't seen you for a while now and I really do want to fill you in on what is happening in my life. Of course, I don't want to make you worry about me or spend all day wondering what it is you could do to help, but I just thought you would like to know. Padme doesn't approve of telling you considering you're not family and that it is none of your business but then she asks me what's going on in your life. She is the strangest girl I've had the luck to meet. Anyway, first I want to hear about what's happening to you. Did you move into that apartment yet? Is Derrek out of your life forever? Why did he have such a sudden change of heart? Also, how's you recording going? I really hope you're doing well. Your singing is excellent. Speaking of, do you have a full CD out yet? Father won't let me go wondering around muggle stores but since he's locked himself in.... I guess that leads to what Roger has been doing, doesn't it?

Padme, like you suggested, wrote a letter to Roger. I'm not sure what it said but I'm sure you can guess. It must have been written well, though, because Father has locked himself in his room and is refusing to come out, even for meals. I don't know what has come over him nor do I care. I have a feeling that he thinks the past has come to haunt him. If I were him, I would be afraid of seeing Padme and Mother again. After all the things he put them through. Tessa knows nothing of the letter Padme has sent. I'm trying to persuade her to do so but she won't take heed to my words. I fear she is going to come out of this situation worse then ever. It's going to make her far more sadistic and arrogant. It may just be my imagination playing dire tricks on me but in my heart I know it is so. I don't know if it's possible for her to get even worse but it seems like it is. Great, huh? Quite the predicament. Tessa has no clue about Padme's plans. Padme has contacted Roger and for all I know told him everything. Roger's locked himself in his room and whenever I walk by I always here the sound of paper crinkling. And me? I think about you often and Mother, Padme. I haven't seen the sun for days. I'm too cowardly to venture outside. I'm afraid that when Roger appears again he will be even more cruel and twisted. Is it right to fear such a thing?

I'm glad I'm writing this to you. It's much easier to think if I talk about my problems. Even writing it is nice. Please, do not worry about me or Padme. We'll be fine just as you convinced me that day. I can't wait until your party. I even find myself thinking about what to wear sometimes. I hope everything is going extremely pleasant with you.

Jack [/font]

[Mackenzie Holden]

Jack,

Wow. A letter. Could you imagine my face when I recieved something I would have to reply to? It wasn't very pleasant, but none the less good to hear from you. Mum was rather curious, however, about why you were writing me- I told her to shove off and leave me alone, and locked myself in my dressing room at the studio. Which we are currently living at. It's rather small for Mum, Dix, and I to be living in- but we manage and we weren't going to turn down Georgia and Tommy's offer for a place to stay until we find an actual place to live. I like it here, though, because in the morning I don't have to get out of my pajamas. I just go into the recording booth and sing in my green shorts and white t-shirt. Sounds nice doesn't it? One thing bad about this place though, is the food. Tommy can't cook, but don't tell him I told you so.

As for Derreck Holden being out of my life, I am sad to say he is not yet. He is filing reports against me, saying the record deal isn't rightfully mine and that recording of my CD should cease immediately. Tommy threw him out of the studio, which I adore him for, and told him to never come back. No proper reports have been sent, and no court date has been put up- but I don't expect it to be too long of a wait until we get served with papers to appear in front of a judge. He has no suddden change of heart, I am sad to say. He just claims to have fallen in love with a 19 year old whench who looks nothing over a day older than 15. It's quite sickening actually.

The CD...well...we have 5 songs so it's coming along. If you want a list here it is:

24 Hours
Waste My Time
Skin
Picked Up The Pieces
Let Me Fall

I'm sure Tommy will have me working more sun up to sun down shifts for the next few weeks. I'll send you a copy when we're finished. Sound good?

Reading upon your father's state, made me laugh for only a second because Mum then shot me a deadly glare for she had been sleeping. Could you see why I find his state so amusing? No. Probably not. Well, let your imagination wander on that for a bit, and if you still don't understand- ask and I'll tell. I'm feeling rather cunning today. I don't expect that this will make him worse when he emerges from his bedroom. If it is as bad as you make it seem, he's probably feeling really guilty about it- and debating whether or not to help. Don't worry. Get out and see some sun, I'm sure you could use some fresh air.

Oh, my party. I think I am having it at the studio, since that is our current- home. I'll let you know further. And don't worry about what you're going to wear, a pair of jeans with a regular t-shirt and a coat jacket will be fine.

Mackenzie

P.S: Going on tour. Will send dates.[/i]

[Jack Rendel S5]

Mack,

Was it really that surprising? Did you think I would actually not talk to you? School is starting soon so we'll be seeing each other eventually but this will do for now. It keeps me busy for some part of the day. Not most of it though. Days now are rather boring and and the same. They all hold the same things for me. Sometimes I feel like I miss my Father's constant ordering but I have decided that the boredom has begun to affect my brain. I feel awful living in this mansion while you three are living in a studio in one room. It must take some getting used to. Send Dix and you mother my regards. I hope all is fairing well for them all. Even though it might improve Dixie's attitude. I smile as I write this. Padme is like a small Dix. At least I think so. I don't really know Dix very well but Padme's speaks about her all the time. I'm still trying to find out if this is a good thing or not. Tell me more about this Tommy sometime, will you? Dix sounded rather fond of him last time but that shows what I know. It does sound rather nice, getting up and playing music, which I know you like to do. Better then what I have, at least.

So, I'm guessing your mother has changed then? She doesn't sound so bad in your letters. Every time I think about her I think of what I saw of her at the air-port before we went off to New York. Is she still the same? I wonder why she didn't understand that this would happen sometime soon. They're all pigs if you ask me. Derrek....Roger.... All of them. It's too bad that we were the unlucky ones to be conceived by them.

I can understand how that is sickening. Roger has been going out with a number of girlfriends but never has he brought someone so young in our house. Actually, he has never brought someone in our house. Now that I think about it, he never takes anyone around like he always brags. I don't think he wants me to see. I suppose it's a possibility. It's just never one I thought about. I have been trying to get into his room lately but it's always locked fast. I haven't caught a glance of him since last Tuesday! I'm starting to worry about him. He is my father. I shudder to think what has become of him.

I can't wait until your CD does come out. How many more songs do you need? I haven't heard those songs yet. Let Me Fall sounds slightly familiar but I've never actually heard it, I think. What about that one that you sang at Club Mineral? I like that one the best so far. I'm sure you can understand why. Try to convince Tommy to let you sing that one. Once I get hold of that CD I will play it so loud that even Roger will have to hear it and praise it. Then, I'll tell him who the singer is and he'll go off with his usual ranting and raving. I laugh as I think about how his face would go bright and his eyes over-bright. He doesn't know about us yet considering the circumstances.

I let my imagination wonder as you suggested but I could only think of the most horrible things. I can't think of him sorry, upset, or guilty. It's just not the Roger as I know him. Five years of being attacked and watching him drink and getting beat up does something to you. That is why I can't imagine him sad. He's just gone into a stupor of some sort, I'm sure. He'll come out of it soon enough as grumpy as ever. I wish I could promise that to you but since things have been rather odd I would break that promise. Perhaps I will go outside and visit with some people. I don't know who now but I will get on it sometime soon.

The party sounds good. I take it that it was your fathers' idea for a formal party?

I hope these letters don't bother you. If they do, just tell me so and I will stop.

Jack

P.S. How much are tickets?
[/font]

[Mackenzie Holden]

Jack,

Not surprising, per se. Just me being annoyed with the fact that I have to pick up a quill or pen and write down words on paper, summon Louis and then send it off to you. It's a lot of work for me...OK, maybe I'm just being arrogant- but hey, what can I say? I've been stuck inside a studio for about three days! Dixie is bound to rub off on me, if not a little. I wasn't surprised to hear from you, I was actually quite overjoyed to know there is life somewhere out there- completely happy that you haven't forgotten about lil ole me. As for you living in a mansion while we are here, it's not that bad. You must find some how to come by. The studio is great.

You enter into the main lobby, and it's all glass. The desk, the walls (but they are a type of glass that are so thick they have water running through them), the flooring is the same as the walls. You walk down a hallway with doors on the left and right side with numbers above them. These are the recording booths. Mine is always number 5. It was the booth that was given to me when I first arrived with...Jamie. Continue walking down that hall you come into the lounge. The lounge is by far my favourite place. It is brightly coloured with wonderful furniture- a small kitchen is in the back corner, and there is a bed on the other side. Along the right wall is a door leading to my dressing room, it has my name on the door and everything. I sleep in there. My mum has a room upstairs, which I haven't ventured to, and Dix gets Tommy's room. This I found odd. But it isn't as horrible as I made it out to be. It's actually quite nice.

Mum hasn't exactly changed. She's just taken charge. When you saw her, she was under the influence of Dad. She's a stronger woman now, she's taken responsibility for a lot of things- and I'm proud of her. She's more compassionate toward me, but that's about it when it comes to a different attitude. All in all, yes, she is still the same Pamela Holden.

Good. I'm sorry if I seem to be a bit blunt with my attitude toward your father's present state, but good. G-O-O-D. He should be suffering, if not only a little, for the way he treated you, your mother, and Padme. I'm just a bit upset that he had to suffer because of such extreme measures. Feel free to scream at me, Jack, but I stand by what I say. He deserves every bit of emotion he is recieving.

My Cd...oi. Tommy wants it out by the end of the summer holidays, but I don't know how we are going to do that exactly. I can only do so much. Yesterday we added a new track to the list: Criminal. Actually, a nice song, but quite annoying to sing over and over again. Even when I had it down- he made me sing it. Yes. 'It Could Be You' will be on there, no matter what Tommy thinks- that is by far my favourite upbeat song. And yes, do feel free to blare my music...I shall much enjoy the stories- if you ever share them.

Oh! Earlier in your letter you asked to know a bit about Tommy. Hmm...what is there to know of the arrogant jerk? He's 21. From an old boy band. And my sister fancies him. Not much to say is there? If you want anymore information, though, please be specific and I will get you the info.

Speaking of, Tommy just came in to get me to go recording- it's 7 in the morning right now, and he expects me to sing. I was surprised I could write as well as I have.

Please, try to go outside, it will do you some good.

These letters don't bother me, they bother Tommy a little. But that just adds to the fun of writing...they annoy him.

Oh! No, the idea was Mum's. She just changed her mind.

Mack

P.S: No idea. Still haven't finalised everything yet. If possible, I'll get you in free.

P.P.S: Dix says to tell Padme she says "Hi, Pet" if you speak to her.[/i]

[Jack Rendel S5]

Mack,
I'm deeply sorry if this letter is extremely messy for I write it in haste. Father is asleep at the moment on the couch but he could wake up at any time. I have learned about what he has been doing. It's strange but I believe you were right about it. I hope you don't mind my ranting about it to you but I honestly need to tell someone about it.

I found some letters on Rogers' bed, all of which were from my mother. They all had initial pleads and threats. It was from about five to six years ago, from the date. Remember, she was thrown out when I was three. All of them were about the same thing. Apparently, Roger didn't reply but kept them in his closet, which is usually locked up too. I guess he didn't want me to see it. I kept one letter with me so I could re-write it for you. I really don't think you'll understand any more then I do. I just need someone to...tell. Here it is, exactly as it was written:

Dearest Roger,

You know why I write this to you. You haven't replied to any of them yet but I still have hope. After all, I was the only one who saw you for what you really are. Don't play pretend any more. I know the reasons for why I was thrown out of the house but did you really have to make up that horrible story about it to our son? The lies. Why can't you tell him? You were wrong for not doing so and now I believe it is too late. I have lived off the streets for now until I found a certain Cameron Luker, who is now my husband. He makes good money and supports the family well but I can't help but think about you. Even our dearest daughter whom you have never seen screams your features. She has your eyes, your chin, your hair, everything. She is such a wonderful child. It's hard for her, however, to accept the circumstances of her family. She doesn't know the truth either. I forbade myself to tell her. It would change her for the worse, I believe. Still, Jack deserves to know about it. It will hurt him horribly, yes, but we must. We were young back then, foolish, but now, I believed you wiser. Please, stop doing this! I need for you to help me and my daughter. She needs you! As do I. Don't delete your own family from your heart, Roger. Don't.

Love,
Tessa

It scared me Mack. Do you understand it? I have no clue what they are talking about. It scared me so bad. What about me? What about Padme? Was that the real reason for throwing out Mother? That she was a bad influence on me? Or...was it something else like this letter said. He knows about Padme. There was even a picture in there. I can't believe what is happening but I'm sure you don't either. None of the other letters gave any indication of what it was they were talking about. She must have known that someone might have intercepted it. What is happening? Or should I say, what has happened? I feel shaky now, out of breath. Raw. I need answers, Mack. I do. I also found a picture of Tessa. She was about seventeen or eighteen. But - Roger didn't know Tessa when they were at that age. They met at age twenty one! I'm so confused Mack. Lost. I have to go now. It sounds like Roger's waking up. He'll be hungry. I'm sorry I didn't mention anything to your letter. I just needed to tell you. I'm sure you understand.

Jack[/size]