One Step Closer (Ivy)

[Nokomis Astarra H5]

Quick steps carried her quietly down the empty hall. It was lunch time, or nearly at least, and all the students had flooded to the great hall. She was sitting in the same seat she always sat in, waiting for Ivy to come. Ivy always sat beside her. She liked certain things always being the same, and she had gotten rather use to Ivy always sitting beside her, and then Kim always being across the table. Ivy was slowly becoming her closest friend at Hogwarts, but Kim always kept meals interesting. The problem today was that Ivy didn’t come. She sat for a while, across from Kim, who was a lot to handle with out back up, before she decided to go find Ivy. She was pretty sure she remembered that Ivy had Runes before lunch today, so she headed in that direction. Slipping into the classroom in hopes she would find Ivy there.

((Sorry its short and not the best start...but I am have no inspiration!))

[Ivy Tunstall]

Ivy stared at her runes in frustration. Even Professor Tyler had left the classroom now, something Ivy had been glad about, not wanting to feel she was being watched. She was getting worried and agitated about the forthcoming Quidditch match, and she couldn't concentrate in classes. And Ancient Runes required all the concentration you could get. She had managed the tasks eventually, but poorly. It wasn't what she had wanted, or really, was used to. It was usually quite a struggle but not too much of a problem. She had finally finished, and after having performed the spell more than a few times to make sure she could still do it, she was finally satisfied. She put the runes she had been using into the little bag they were contained in and put it away in the cupboard.

Ivy started to pack her things away into her bag, glancing at her watch. It was really late by now! No wonder she was so hungry. Nokomis would probably be wondering where she was in actual fact, considering that Ivy usually met her in lunch. But she'd probably have Kim to keep her company. Ivy swung her bag over her shoulders with perhaps more vehemence than had been intended, as it swung right off again and she had to attempt a more controlled swing. It was getting heavier and heavier in the lead up to exams, and she often miscalculated her swing nowadays. At least she hadn't swung it into anyone or anything. Ivy looked up as the door eased open, and she saw Nokomis walk through it quietly. Ivy gave her a surprised smile, hoping that she'd been looking for her, although that was probably improbable.
"Hallo," she said, smiling at her friend again, and sitting down on one of the desks. "Looking for something? Did you leave something behind? I'll help you find it if you want. I should know this place by the back of my hand the amount of time I've spent in here now."

[Nokomis Astarra H5]

Stepping inside the room she stopped to look around. She had never actually been inside the runes classroom before. It wasn't a subject taht she took, and while sometimes she and Ivy walked to their classes on these days together, she always passed by.

Hearing Ivy's familiar voice she smiled at her friend. Ivy asked if she was loking for something, and after she started to shake her head, se stopped. She was lookin for someting actually. Well, someone was more accurate.

"I was looking for you actually. You weren't a lunch yet and I wanted to make sure everything was okay."

[Ivy Tunstall]

Ivy smiled at Nokomis as she said she had been looking for her. She put her bag back down on the table carefully; had she swung it off again it would probably have made rather a large bang. She regarded it regretfully. It couldn't be right that she was carrying around about her body weight in books. She was still working herself hard. She felt a bit happier as a person now, but she had a lot of things she really didn't want to think about. Her father. Her mother. Her grandfather. The Quidditch match against Slytherin. Much better to do her homework well and revise for the coming exams. There was a long way to go to them yet, but it would at least mean she wasn't in a panic at the last moment. It did mean she was very busy now, but that was really how she wanted things to be. At least she didn't spend her lunchtimes working. She usually spent those eating lunch with Nokomis, and Kim. Kim provided most of the conversation. Nokomis would probably have already been to lunch. Ivy would just have to go and grab a sandwich or two and an apple from the Great Hall in that case.

"Yeah, everything's okay." Ivy said. "Except for my Ancient Runes." Ivy smiled again at Nokomis, although her Runes were worrying her. It was a subject she wanted to do an OWL in, but she had been struggling with it recently. Maybe when she was a bit more rested and a bit less fraught she would be able to do it again. She'd never struggled much before. "But they'll improve, no doubt. At least I hope they will." Ivy sighed and pulled her hair out of the yellow bobble, as most of it was coming undone anyway. Fiddling with it instead of slipping it onto her wrist as usual, she spun it on her index finger as she looked back to Nokomis.
"I suppose you'll have already had lunch," Ivy said, since the subject was on her mind due to the fact it was already at least 25 minutes into the lunch break and she hadn't eaten anything since her breakfast, which had, as usual, been early. She always tended to wake up early; she was finding it hard to settle back down into a better sleep pattern. But it did at least give her some time to herself. "I'll find the time to eat something anyway." She gave her friend another smile and sat on top of one of the desks, swinging her legs to and fro aimlessly.

[Nokomis Astarra H5]

SHe moved carefully to the Desk deside Ivy and sat down, still looking over at her friend. Ivy was so smart. She was at least taking Runes, even if she did say that she was having a hard time with it. Nokomis was sure that she wouldn't even make it through the first five minutes of the class, let alone actually pass it by the end of the term.

"I'm sure your doing great." she said, trying to be supportive, thouht she did honestly believe it.


"I haven't eaten anthing actually. I was waiting, I didn't want to eat until you got something until you got there, and then I came to find you."

She fell silent againf or a moment, looking down at her hands and then back at Ivy. Things felt off today. Like they weren't quite normal and no one was talking about it. She wondered if it was the fact Quiddich against Slytherin was coming up.

[Ivy Tunstall]

((Meh, I have been terribly naughty. Sorry. ))

Ivy smiled slightly at her friend. Nokomis was always very good at making Ivy feel better. Feel less worried about herself. Part of it was, perhaps, that Nokomis was quite quiet in the same way that Ivy was. And Ivy felt comfortable being quiet around Nokomis, because she knew that Nokomis would not think any the worse of her for being so. Both of them seemed quite awkward at the moment. Because Ivy had no idea how to voice what she was thinking. And Ivy wasn't sure what Nokomis was thinking at the moment. Maybe Quidditch. It was certainly a good place to start. Both of them thought a good deal about Quidditch - they both loved it - but at the moment it was exactly Quidditch that was worrying Ivy and tying her tongue.

Ivy smiled again at her friend as she said that she'd waited for Ivy. Ivy felt a bit bad about that, that her struggling with her Ancient Runes and not turning up to lunch as normal had meant that Nokomis had been distracted from enjoying herself eating. "Oh right," was all that Ivy said, since she wasn't quite sure what to say. Ivy met Nokomis' eyes, but still couldn't be quite sure what her quiet friend was thinking. But Nokomis was the only friend she could possibly talk to about her worries. Ivy just didn't know where to start. She wanted to talk about it. She couldn't just keep all her worries to herself. But what should she say? She didn't want to worry Nokomis. Ivy swirled all her thoughts around in her head, while silence ensued as no one said anything.
"Do you..." Ivy started, and as usual stopped again just as suddenly. "How's Quidditch coming along?" Ivy decided on, although it sounded stupid even as she said the words. Nokomis was being great in charge of the team. But Ivy couldn't think of any other way to start saying what she wanted to say. She couldn't just plunge into it.

[Nokomis Astarra H5]

For some reason she thought something was wrong with Ivy, or something was bothering her and she just wasn’t saying it yet. She seemed extra quiet, and where Ivy was normally the one who smiled and encouraged her, something was up with her friend. She didn’t really know what, but something was defiantly wrong.

It was only natural for the topic to change to Quidditch. With them, the topic always changed to quidditch and it came so easily to them. Especially since she had taken over the team and had relied on Ivy for positive support.

“Things are coming.” She immediately wanted to pour our all of her problems, but she knew she wouldn’t. Ivy was the person she was closest to in all the world, and she still didn’t tell Ivy everything, about how she didn’t sleep for days when she was worried about the team not being filled out, about how she was sort of half scared of their new beater, one of the twins who always seemed to be doing something he shouldn’t…Dillion, that was his name.
“I am so worried about our Slytherin game I almost can’t think.”<br>She looked over at Ivy again, wondering if her friend was worried about the game too. Slytherin was always a hard match because you never knew if they were going to play dirty.

[Ivy Tunstall]

Ivy smiled quietly at her friend. Things were coming. That was true. They had a team now, where before most of the team had deserted them. Ivy had a great deal of admiration at the second year's achievements in the short time she had been captain. She had put together a fully functioning team from seemingly nothing. Ivy could see that her friend looked worried as she was talking about it, and she tried to think about what it was that might be worrying her. Putting together the team had probably been very stressful, but there was no denying that Nokomis had done a marvellous job. Ivy looked up. Her friend had just said that she couldn't think because she was so worried about the Slytherin game.

Ivy watched Nokomis thoughtfully for a moment before admitting in almost an undertone, "Me too." She frowned, biting her lip and looking rather unhappy as she pondered what to say to explain herself. She was afraid of telling anyone why she was afraid to play in that game. That she didn't want to come face to face with any of those girls. They had made it quite clear that they despised anyone of lesser blood than them, and it seemed they despised Hufflepuff house the most of all. So how could she possibly intercept or steal the Quaffle off them? "I mean, you're a great captain for the team," Ivy said, "and you've got us a team worthy of playing Quidditch again. I mean, it'd be all right if we were playing Ravenclaw, even though they slaughtered us last time, but it's Slytherin..." Ivy looked over to Nokomis unhappily. She didn't want to explain to her friend just how frightened she was of coming face to face with one of those Slytherins again. She wasn't even sure she would, but it was scaring her sick.

[Nokomis Astarra H5]

She bit her bottom lip, looking over at Ivy when she said taht she too was worrieda bout the game. So it wasn't just her. While she wished Ivy was confident and happy, it was a slight relief that she wasn't the only one who could bairly think they were so worried about their current match.

"I know. Any house other than Slytherin...any one."

She sighed, looking down at her feet. She had seen them in matches, they played dirty, they woudl do what it took to win. It was her first match as captins, some of the teammembers first matches ever. What if Slytherin made sure they never wanted to play the game again.

[Ivy Tunstall]

Ivy nodded at Nokomis' words. They reflected exactly her sentiments. She didn't want to play Slytherin - if she saw one of them there, how was she going to get the Quaffle off them or score against them or dodge a Bludger they'd hit or whatever? Ivy looked at Nokomis, fiddling with a loose thread on her jumper. "I don't know whether I can do it," she blurted out suddenly, instantly worrying that she would be making things worse for her friend. But she needed to talk to someone about her worries, and Nokomis was the person who she was closest to.

"I'm afraid..." Ivy said, frowning as she did so, "...that... I won't manage to stand... to do my job as Chaser against particular Slytherins." Ivy was aware that what she was saying again probably made very little sense, but she didn't know how to explain herself. It was a very painful memory which only they and that older Ravenclaw boy who she'd never seen again knew about. Ivy tugged again at her hair. Nokomis was the Hufflepuff Quidditch captain, and she needed Ivy to be able to do her best. Well, to be able to do what she was normally able to do as Chaser against the Slytherin team. Especially as the Slytherin team probably wouldn't be concerned with playing fair.

[Nokomis Astarra H5]

Concern washed over her face when Ivy said how worried she was. Ivy always seemed to together, she didn't even know Ivy was that afraid about the game. She had her own worries, but she didn't think Ivy would have them too.

"Oh Ivy...You are one of our best players. I know you can do it. I mean...Slytherin...they are..." For a moment she didn't know what to say. There weren't words really. They were Slytherin and there was no telling what they would do. They seemed to have different boundaries. "Well, you know."

She sat silently for a moment, not really knowing what to say or how to help.
"Is there anything I can do Ivy? I mean...the team needs you...but I understand."

[Ivy Tunstall]

Ivy felt really bad at Nokomis' concern. She usually kept her own worries to herself; Nokomis had enough of her own with the team and Ivy shouldn't be adding to them. But she couldn't not talk to Nokomis about it. She didn't know whether she would be able to manage in the game. She was going to try, and she was less scared now by Slytherins in general than she had been straight after what had happened. But if she did see one of them on the team, what then? She would have liked to have guaranteed to herself that she would be able to ignore it, grit her teeth and do her best at playing Chaser. She wished that were the case, and that she could tell Nokomis she would be fine. But how could Ivy tell her that? Deceiving herself was one thing, but she couldn't deceive her best friend about it. Not when she didn't believe herself that she'd be able to do her job as Hufflepuff Chaser.

"I'll try... I'll try," Ivy said finally. "I'll try not to get put off. I'll... try... to stay in there as Chaser. But I don't know if I can manage." Ivy looked at Nokomis, distraught. She didn't want to admit that she wasn't sure she could do it. She felt so often that she was letting her team down when she played, somehow she had let her house down, even though she'd tried her best. But she felt she was letting everyone down here. Her team, Hufflepuff, herself, and most of all Nokomis. She shouldn't be doing it, but she'd told Nokomis her worries now and there was nothing she could do to take them back again. "If I'm not managing, will you put someone else on?" Ivy asked, her voice wavering a bit as she did so. Their team always had such strong spirit, and she was being a weak link in it. "Just for a bit, so I can manage to... go back and play as Chaser." Ivy tugged at her hair again, pulling the bobble back and forth, stretching the elastic. She felt terrible. She was letting people down already.