I wish I was asleep. (Amelia)

[Danny McKay G5]

Danny woke up early today and didn’t know why, normally he could sleep forever but today he just couldn’t get back to sleep and it was really starting to annoy him because he didn’t even have any classes today. He could have slept the whole day if he wanted to but no his body had other plans he guessed. He spent then next fifteen minutes just lying in bed looking up at the roof wishing he could just get back to sleep but he already knew that wasn’t going to happen. So after a while he just got up and got changed into a sweater which it wasn’t really cold out and the sweater didn’t even keep him warm sometimes. It just felt so comfortable and for some reason he liked that the sleeves of it were longer then his arms but that was his moms knitting for you.

Danny headed down to the common room after changing and there was a few people already awake but they probably choose to wake up. He didn’t feel like going down the great hall just yet so Danny toke an empty seat by the fire and just sat there some what hoping to go back to sleep. He sat there and yawned a few times then gave up again knowing for sure there was no hope to go back to sleep so he might as well get on with the rest of today and try to enjoy it.

He slowly made his way down the stairs and wondered why in the world would someone put a common room this far away from the great hall. Danny laughed a little as he thought about it. You pretty much had to run a marathon to get to breakfast. This made Danny laugh a little more as he thought about it. “I guess if I wanted breakfast closer I should have been a Hufflepuff.” He muttered to him smiling remember that the Hufflepuff common room was pretty much right next to the great hall.

Danny made it to the bottom floor and headed for the great hall. He walked into the great hall and looked over to the Gryffindor table and didn’t see anybody he knew well enough to sit down and talk to so he sat down at the open part of the table now realizing that he didn’t even feel like eating. Somewhere between leaving the common room and getting here he had lost the feeling of hunger he had before. Danny just laughed and put his head down still laughing at how stupid that seemed.

[ames]

Maybe I should just stay in bed forever? Would anyone care? Maybe I could die right here and see her again? The thoughts went through Amelia's mind as she lay there, awake. The morning was already dreary, well to her it felt that way. She wished she could stay there in her soft bed forever. The thoughts appealed to her more and more as the seconds went by. A sigh escaped her lips. What was the point? Staying there would just get her into trouble and cause more attention than she wanted. Her eyes stared up at the high ceiling of the Gryffindor Dormitory. The heat from the heater at the center of the dorm radiated through the room, forcing the cold that wished to attack the toes of the residents.

Along with the depressive thoughts, came memories. Memories she didn't want anymore. Memories she wished she could forget. Desperately she had wished for a time-turner. She would give anything to go back in time and warn her mother of the tragedy that would surely come to her if she drove that night. Amelia felt her chin suddenly begin to quiver. She took a deep breath, keeping the tears away. There wasn't any point in crying, now. There was no reason to remain in this stage of grief forever. She fought the tears, willing them to stay behind her eyes. Amelia was weak however, and the tears flowed. She shut her eyes, the wet tears falling into her ears.

Another sigh and Amelia sat up, wiping her tears from her face. She stood, forcing the red velvet curtains aside. She took a deep breath, wondering how she was going to survive the day. A yawn attacked her. Her mouth opened wide and she fell backward, her yawn taking all her strength. There was something wrong. Every since the accident, Amelia has become more and more tired. Her body getting weaker, almost as if her strength was seeping slowly from her body.

Miraculously, Amelia got herself to rise from the bed. The floor was cold, despite the heater's attempts at warming the tower room. She felt herself sigh as she looked into her chest at her clothes. She grabbed her uniform and robes, which were wrinkled, and slipped them on. She did regard her appearance for a split second, wondering if she should do her hair. She shrugged, her body willing to go back to bed. There was no energy to spare for something as meaningless than her hair. So, instead, Amelia just pulled her wavy brown hair into a pony-tail, without brushing it, and left the dorm.

Her stomach growled as she thought of breakfast. She shrugged. Might as well, she thought. she hadn't eaten the day before. It took too much energy, but she was quite hungry all the sudden. Amelia made her way through the empty common room. With a glance at the clock, she realized she had woken a bit early and that everyone else was most likely still in bed. She slowed her pace, wondering if she should just go back to bed, but it was too late. She probably wouldn't have been able to fall back to sleep anyway and continued out through the portrait hole. The fat lady, who had seen Amelia daily since her mother's death, was concerned for the student.

"Have a nice day, Amelia." The woman in the picture said sadly. Amelia nodded, waving slightly and wanting to cry once again. She sniffed, her body straightening as she walked. It was time to be strong. She descended the staircase and entered the Great Hall. There were other early risers there as well, but only a few. Amelia made her way to the Gryffindor table, where breakfast was laid out, steaming hot and fresh. She sat down without looking at anyone at the table and began eating.

[Danny McKay G5]

“I must be losing my mind… how can you forget to be hungry.” He muttered to himself with his head in his arms that were on the table. He kept his head down as he thought about him being put into a straight jacket for going insane. Him being dragged away yelling ” but I could have sworn I was hungry.” Danny laughed a little with his head down. For some reason he even started to feel sleepily again which he didn’t have a problem with. There was a first time for everything and falling asleep in the great hall would be a big first for him. Have some house elf poke him to get him up so there can clean.

He stayed just how he was but the idea of sleeping was soon destroyed with all the other voices. ” Really how can there be four tables worth of morning people in this school?” He asked himself in his head. Danny just kept this head down thinking that he might be able to fall asleep if tried harder which didn’t make sense he knew but it was still worth a try. He focused on a nice fluffy bed with a fluffy pillow and a warm blanket. Danny laughed a little finally giving up on sleep altogether there was no point if he could get to sleep in his bed how could he fall back to sleep here.

He finally lifted his head up to see Amelia sitting a crossed from pretty much and smiled for a second till he saw the look on her face. “I guess covering your eyes to get you to smile isn’t going to work this time is it?” He asked her as he looked over at her. He was always a good judge on how people were feeling. But some people were just too good at hiding it. Danny couldn’t think of anything that would seem to make her smile he was drawing a complete blank He thought for a second that maybe he really was losing his mind. “So are you going to come watch me get hit by a few Bludgers in the head?” He said smiling over to Amelia hoping for some kind of response.

(Sorry If it's to short and not that good, I had to hurry so I could get it done before I had to go.)

[ames]

The food should have made her mouth water with the wonderful steamy fragrance of eggs and toast, but instead it made her sick. She looked at her plate, two eggs and a slice of toast lay there, looking pitiful. Amelia knew she should eat, her stomach growled with the need for food, but something about eating made her nauseas. She poked the eggs with her fork, her head propped up on her elbow. Her mouth was filled with the taste of hunger. She sighed, putting a forkful of egg into her mouth. She tried to chew, but it just didn't seem to work. It felt like she was chewing plastic. She fought herself to swallow and finally pushed her plate away, disgusted.

How many times had she sighed? How long had it been since she had really smiled? A week? Two? It was harder and harder to get out of bed in the morning and she found herself wishing she were dead just so she could see her mother again. Amelia wasn't the type to become suicidal, and even now, the thought scared her half to death, but the thought of seeing her mother one more time. To hug her, kiss her, tell her how much she loved her, was becoming unbearable. Amelia sighed, closing her eyes, and trying to force away the thoughts. Wishing never got you anything but disappointment.

A voice spoke to her, jolting her from her thoughts. Amelia looked up suddenly, her eyes wide. Danny sit across from her, his eyes full of pity. Averting her eyes so she didn't cry, Amelia smiled a fake smile. Danny's question made memories crop up again. She had seen him that summer and he played a child's game where he covered her eyes from behind and said 'guess who!' Back then, it had made Amelia giggle and smile at him, but she knew if he did it now, all she could do was smile her same little fake smile. She hadn't smiled since before her mother's death and she didn't plan on it.

Danny asked if she were going to go to the Quidditch game. Amelia shrugged.

"Maybe," she said, her voice soft. She hadn't spoked in maybe two days and her voice sounded unused and weak. In truth, she hadn't even thought about the Quidditch game. Did she really want to be in a huge crowd of shouts and gleeful cheers? Not really. She didn't even want to get out of bed in the morning, why would she want to go to a Quidditch game?

[Danny McKay G5]

Danny smiled as he heard her say maybe with a voice that didn’t sound like her own. “Well that’s good enough for me then.” He said still trying to keep his smile using what had to be the worst logic in the world he thought. Maybe if he smiled or was in a good mood her mood would improve. It was the logic he always followed in a way. He didn’t really remember where he would get an idea like that maybe from his mother. But that didn’t matter anymore it was his poor logic and idea now which made him still smile kind of as he thought about it.

“So…” Danny said stopping himself, he was so close to asking her what was wrong but stopped himself. He realized that if she was still this upset about it she probably didn’t want to say what it was about to him or think about it even more. After that there were a few moments of silence which Danny hated but he just didn’t really know what to say. It wasn’t really like him to not have anything to say but then again he never really was around someone who seemed this sad about something. “Well is there anything I can do to get you to smile or cheer up?” He said somewhat smiling over at her. “Name it and I’ll get right on it.” He said with a short laugh.

He looked down at the empty plate for a second and he still didn’t feel hungry but he kept looking down at it as if looking at an empty plate would make him hungry again or something. “How can you forget to be hungry…?” He muttered asking himself forgetting that he said that out loud. He looked back up at Amelia and wondered to himself what could have happened. It had to be something bad, really bad. Danny stopped because he didn’t want to think about all the bad things that would run thought his head as he thought about what could have been wrong.

[ames]

It was difficult to not meet the eager boy's eye. Amelia kept her blue eyes cast down, trying to avoid the smiles and attempts at stabbing her with joy. She bit her lip, poking at the food on her plate. Danny's overly joyful smiles were almost as if he were mocking the poor girl. She knew he wasn't, but it still felt that way in the back of her mind. She wanted desperately to look up at him and smile back, to laugh and joke and be happy, but that part of her was shut down. She couldn't feel happiness. Only painfully remember the way it felt to laugh and sing and enjoy her life. There was no joy left now that her mother was gone.

Danny took another stab at a joke, trying his hardest to cheer her up. She looked up at him as he asked if there was anything he could do. She wanted to be angry with him, to yell and scream at him that it was no use and to stop trying. She wanted to glare and cry and fall apart, but she couldn't. Her anger was shut off from her just like her happiness. She stared at him, her eyes blank and piercing. She tried to smile. To give the boy hope that she would make it through this ordeal. The smile felt fake, probably looked faker than it felt. It must have looked like a painful grimace, because that's what she felt when she tried to smile. Her face fell into an expression of blank as she gave up.

"It's no use, Danny." She said quietly, "I can't feel anymore." The words hung in the air between them. She was startled at her truthful words. What had made her say something so emotional and personal? She felt tears sting her eyes. Amelia stood, suddenly from the table. She needed to get out of there. Why she had come, she didn't know.

"I..." She tried to say she had to leave, but when she opened her mouth, the tears flowed. She shook her head, horrified that she was crying in public and fled. She ran from the Great Hall. Whether or not Danny followed was immune to Amelia just like her feelings. She ran from the Great Hall and collapsed on the stairs. She couldn't walk, her legs were trembling. She wasn't crying very hard, but the emotions inside her were screaming to be let out. She held them back. Instead she sat there on the bottom step, her head in her hands, trying to calm her racing emotions.