Tears of Time ((Ingrid))

[wendi]

"Oh fish sticks." Wendi muttered as she reached down to pick up the quill she had dropped to the ground. Wendi grabbed it as fast as she could and moved away. Lately, she hadn't had a lot of patience. Not for anything really. She had avoided Jami with all her will and effort and nothing really calmed her down. Wendi was moving twenty-four seven or so it seemed. She didn't really realize this herself, but all she did was move. Maybe she thought that if she moved, time couldn't reach her nor could the realities of life. But, Wendi was too smart to be that naive. Keith had shattered that for her as awful as it was. Wendi stumbled in her beat up ballet shoes. For weeks, they had been the only thing that had touched her feet. Wendi only took them off to bathe and sleep. Wendi just hasn't felt like caring. Plus, the old beat up shoes had memories, but Wendi wasn't really thinking about that, not at all. Wendi had been no talk only movement for weeks and she was determined to keep it this way at least for a little while longer.

Wendi's next class was Potions, in the dungeons, but she still had a good amount before the class started. Wendi didn't care though. She briskly walked through the halls. Suddenly, she spotted a familiar face. Carr McDuff. He was a good friend of Wendi's, but she wasn't about to stop for them. Then she would have to think. For days, stopping mean thinking for Wendi and she knew this all too well. If she stopped, then she would have to think about Keith. She would have to think about how he killed her parents and how he was back. How he promised to visit her this year. Wendi would have to think about all of that and this was something she was determined to avoid. "Wendi hey." Carr stopped and waved. "Hiya." She said in her normal squeaky type voice. Wendi walked on. "Hey wait kiddo!" Carr called. Wendi halted for a brief moment and looked back. "No thanks." She said cooly. The few words that Wendi had said over the fast few weeks had basically all been negative. She couldn't help herself. "Please, Wendi." He persisted. "Let's talk." Wendi shook her head as she turned the corner. "No need." She called back.

Wendi stopped by the common room to pick up her forgotten Potions Book and then headed down to the dungeons. As Wendi left the crowded room, she saw that face again. "Stalking me McDuff?" She said briskly. Carr shook his head. "C'mon Wendi. What's with you. You actually have me worried." He told her in his serious voice. Wendi shook her head slightly. "Great.." She muttered. Just what Wendi needed, another boy worried about her. "Wendi, please just stop. Don't you get tired of this?" He asked raising his voice a bit. Wendi paused for a moment and then started walking again but at a slower pace. "Not at all." She lied as she bit her lip softly. She looked back. Carr was still trailing her. What did he want with her exactly? The were now towards the entrance of the castle. "You scare me." Carr said as he stopped moving. Wendi stopped in her tracks and looked back at him. "What?" She asked with an eyebrow raised. "You scare me." He said again. Wendi looked at him as the color filled up in her face.

Wendi felt the need to do something stupid. Why did she want to hug Carr so badly right now? Did she like him or something? He after all was three years older than her. Wendi stared at him again. "Why?" She asked breathless. "Because I need for you to be Wendi again, to be you and again and that scares me because." He paused. "Because, I'm not supposed to need anyone." Wendi looked at him hard. And for the first time in weeks, she cracked a smile. "Who says?" Wendi asked still with that little smile plastered on her face. Carr cracked a smile. "Is she back?" He asked. Wendi knew what he meant. She shook her head. "Not yet." She said timidly. "She's not ready to come back. Not now." Carr nodded. "Well, let me know." He said smiling. He turned around and walked away. Wendi blushed. Did he just flirt with her? Did she like it? And why was she becoming a real teenager, now? Wendi looked after him. She shook her head slightly after the staring wore off. She looked at her feet. They weren't moving. A strange, unknown tear streaked Wendi's face. She didn't know why, but it had. Wendi silently slipped to the dungeons and dropped to the ground hard at the first sight of the damp wall. She cried for no reason other than it was time to. She cried because she could and because things seemed to slowly be coming back to her. Time finally seemed to be covering Wendi. Wendi didn't even realize that in the process of falling, she had hit her foot to the point that it was bleeding. She sighed as a tear washed over this. Wendi hated crying, but maybe this was a good thing.

((All G-molding of Carr approved.))

[Ingrid Lewis H4]

Her hair was back. Ingrid growled as she tugged at a snarl ball in her hair. She had just cut it, what had made it grow so fast? It had just reached her chin the night before, and now it was back to lying just past her shoulder blades. At least it looked more like hair now instead of wet spaghetti noodles. Ingrid pressed her nose up against the mirror and looked at her eyes. They weren’t red anymore either. This was very odd. “Very odd indeed,” Ingrid said aloud to herself as she pulled away from the mirror and looked herself over in the mirror. A portrait behind her spoke and made her jump. She pressed her palm to her chest and breathed as she realized it was just one of the ladies. “I’m sorry, what did you say?” she asked in a breathless tone. The portrait smiled, “I said you have grown up over the past year.” Ingrid tilted her head questioningly and then turned to look at herself in the mirror again. The portrait was right. She had grown over the past year. Ingrid bit her lip before grabbing her deep pink jacket and leaving the second year Hufflepuff dormitories. She pounded down the stairs and sped through the common room.

She had potions next, and Ingrid hated potions. She would go though, because she was a good girl like that and because she wouldn’t want to make her dear mum upset at her. That’s always been my problem, she thought cynically with sarcasm, I’ve always been the perfect daughter. Never have I ever done anything that would disappoint my parents or hurt my friends. I’ve been abnormal and that’s just not normal. Ingrid’s sneakers carried her toward the dungeons. She had to shove her way past everyone else, and as she did this she sent them icy glares. After a moment or so, she came upon the corridor where she fainted. That blasted corridor that made everything fall apart. She froze in her spot and wouldn’t move, no matter how many people pushed her forward. Finally they got the idea and moved around her. Took them long enough. Soon the corridor was empty apart from her and she knew she would be late to class. She could just not go. At least then she wouldn’t lose points.

Ingrid forced down the lump in her throat and took a step forward. Within five minutes she was heading down toward the dungeons, the hard part was over. After class, though, she knew she would have to face that damned corridor again and Ingrid would rather not deal with that at the moment. As she descended the stairs to the potions classroom, she heard crying. She didn’t stop, if someone was crying she would ask them if they were okay, get the usual response and move on. Nothing huge. When she reached the landing, Ingrid stopped in mid-step. Wendi Parson was crying against the wall. Wendi Parson never cried. At least, not from what Ingrid knew of her. She took a step closer and pondered asking her if everything was alright or not. Obviously not if Wendi was crying, but… still Ingrid felt the need to ask.

“Wendi?” she stuttered out. Ingrid and Wendi shared a dorm, along with Sita and Harmony and two others. They weren’t the closest of friends but they had been in the same room for two years so Ingrid knew little about her. Ingrid sat down beside Wendi and closed her eyes, trying to imagine them someplace else. Anywhere else. When nothing happened, Ingrid opened her eyes again and sighed. “Life sucks. No, it more than sucks. Life is terrible.” She finally said.

[wendi]

Tears streaked Wendi's peachy face. She hated this. She hated crying and she hated this damp place. It wasn't like Wendi to cry, Well, not in public. Wendi usually showed her true feelings, but crying, that was a different story. When people cried, other people saw that person as weak. Or usually that's how the story went. Wendi wasn't weak. She hated to even feel the tiniest bit weak, but now she did. She wasn't weak from choice, but because of actions. Actions that she couldn't even begin to control. Keith made Wendi weak. His newly found presence in her life made her weak at the knees and not in a happy-go-lucky, in love kind of way. Keith made Wendi feel like falling and never under any circumstances get up. Wendi could blame stuff on Keith until the cows came home and still she wouldn't have a problem with it. Usually, Wendi didn't judge people too much and she gave second chances, but Keith didn't have those privileges. Who on earth would give the man who murdered your parents privileges? No one, that's who.

Wendi felt so alone. She didn't seem to have anyone for the moment. Wendi didn't know where Myn was and May just hadn't been the same since Leon's death. Wendi's two very best friends seemed a world away from her despite the fact that Wendi needed them so very, very badly. Wendi just felt like a lonely little puppy dog on the street as cliche as it sounded. She hated this feeling, these tears, but they just came. There was no turning back mainly because Wendi had no place to turn to. No, one she really wanted help from now. Maybe she was meant to go through this all alone. Yea, maybe that was right. But, Wendi wasn't particularly an alone person. Not at all actually. Wendi shook her head lightly as another light tear covered her bleeding ankle. It wasn't bad at all now was it any pain that Wendi just couldn't indoor. No, she could handle this. She had to. Wendi looked up suddenly as she heard foot steps and a voice.

It was Ingrid Lewis. Wendi and Ingrid shared a dorm with some of the other second year girls. But, Wendi didn't know a lot about Ingrid, but she knew enough to talk to her. Mainly, Wendi hung out with Ravenclaw students. She couldn't really help it now did she know why she did it. Maybe it was because Wendi's entire family besides Keith and Wendi herself had been placed in Ravenclaw. That was probably it. Still, Wendi didn't have a problem talking to her dorm mates. Not at all. Wendi watched as Ingrid sat down beside her. She nodded lightly. "You know what?" Wendi announced calmly. "A year ago, I wouldn't have agreed, but now I do. Now, I totally do." Wendi said knowing that maybe the immature part of her was coming out, but she didn't care one little bit. Wendi looked at the damp dungeon that surrounded them and just stared at the darkness of it all for a moment.

She looked at Ingrid. Then, down at her ankle and then at Ingrid again. Wendi wondered if Ingrid knew how much she really hated this. Wendi hated herself for being this weak, being this young, being this naive. Wendi hated that she was in this position. She hated it so much. Wendi sighed as her tears seemed to be slowly stopping. She was thankful for that, but Wendi was pretty sure that they would come back. She looked around her. "I hate this place. I really do." She said gasping for air a little bit. "Do you ever feel like Hogwarts just isn't the place for you? Like that if you could just get away from this castle for a bit then you'll be fine and back to normal?" Wendi asked getting deep into her emotions. Really, she wanted nothing more than to have a light and fluffy conversation with Ingrid right now, but that wasn't going to happy. Not for now.

[Ingrid Lewis H4]

Ingrid’s blue eyes remained on Wendi, “That’s funny,” she said with an amused grin on her face, “because I would have said the same thing. Last year everything seemed so much easier, didn’t it? Basically all we had to worry about was staying on Snape’s good side and making sure to apologize if you ran into a Slytherin. Now, it’s… so much more than that.” Ingrid ran her fingers through her hair and turned her gaze away from Wendi. Everything was so different from last year. Ingrid hadn’t expected she would ever feel as hopeless as she did this year. Of course she had gotten slightly better since the beginning of the year, but she still wasn’t back to being Ingy. She didn’t know when Ingy would ever return. For as long as she needed to be, she would be Ingrid. Maybe Ingy would never return and if she did return maybe she would be a different Ingy. Whoever this girl was becoming, it wasn’t someone many people seemed to like. At least, not those who mattered.

Her gaze followed Wendi’s down to her ankle, and Ingrid gasped. “Oh… you’re hurt.” She spoke in a whisper before pulling it out her wand. “This won’t hurt a bit.” Ingrid smiled reassuringly at Wendi and then waved her wand before tapping Wendi’s ankle. In moments it was healed, and Ingrid twiddled her wand in between her fingers. “That’s one of my best spells. I used to get hurt quite a lot, so one night I looked up all the healing spells I was capable of doing. This one cures most things.” Ingrid put her wand away and brought her knees up to her chest, resting her elbows on them. There was a small silence between them, and then Wendi said she hated Hogwarts. Ingrid looked at Wendi in slight shock and then bit her lip as Wendi asked if she ever felt like she could just get away from the castle and be fine. The idea had crossed her mind plenty of times before. She had even contemplating staying at home over the summer. But in her heart she knew she couldn’t part from Hogwarts.

“I… Honestly?” Ingrid asked as she turned her gaze back to the staircase that was in front and to the left of them. “No. I haven’t. I know that regardless of where I am or where I feel like running to, I’m still going to have to face the problems that I wish to run from. Running from Hogwarts, would be running from sanctuary. I know that might sound odd or perhaps even a bit far fetched when it comes to what you believe, but Hogwarts is my second home and it’s the place where I come first. At home I’m 6th, always and forever.” Ingrid chewed her bottom lip in thought and then shrugged again. “I suppose if you ever want to leave Hogwarts, you can. Just… stay home. Though, for some reason, I don’t think home would be the best place for you.” Ingrid tilted her head and raised her eyebrow. She didn’t want to feel like she was prying, but she couldn’t help but feel that maybe Wendi felt like she didn’t belong anywhere.

[wendi]

Wendi nodded brushing a few tears from a newly wet face. Wendi wasn’t that girl she had been last year. Well, not really. After the castle was attacked, a piece of Wendi was hurt along with her leg that day. Actually, a piece of her was kind of taken from her. Many people had been injured that day, but had they all changed as much as Wendi had? After all these years of Jami saying ‘Always watch your back’, Wendi now believed him. Even Hogwarts didn’t seem the same. And now, with Keith. Wendi had regained a small piece of herself since the months after that attack, but when Keith sent that letter, Wendi was back to that little girl sad and alone in the hospital wing. The little girl who felt so alone even though some of her dear friends and family were with her the whole time. She felt little again. Wendi didn’t like that little side of her. That little girl who clung to her brother’s legs and wore shamrock crowns on her head. That little girl was in the past, but Wendi felt like her in times of pain. It was like, Wendi wanted that little girl back in some ways. She wanted to feel happy and care-free again. But, she didn’t in other ways. She could do without the reactions from people at the sign of her childish behaviors. But, now, Wendi felt little again. I’m not little. I’m not weak. She told her self. Not anymore. Never again.

Wendi looked down at her ankle as Ingrid spoke of it. She sighed. She had nearly forgotten about it. Her tears seemed to have eased the pain and the talking made her forget about it. Now, her ankle was merely dried blood and a mixture of tears. Wendi smiled lightly as Ingrid told her it wouldn’t hurt. Then, suddenly her ankle was healed. “Thanks.” Wendi said softly. “That is one of the more convenient spells I’ve ever seen.” She said calmly as she looked down at her healed ankle. Wendi nodded softly. She was silently glad that Ingrid was with her. Wendi and Ingrid had never spent too much time together in the past. Wendi’s best friends were May and Myn and Ingrid’s were Sita and Aaron. It wasn’t like Wendi and Ingrid weren’t nice to each other, it was just that Wendi felt a sort of stronger connection with Ravenclaw students. That was probably because all of Wendi’s family had been placed in Ravenclaw and many of them kind of spoke in the same smart like way. Wendi had connected with Myn and May from the beginning without even trying. Now, she kind of missed them. They were off doing their own things, leaving Wendi like this.

Wendi shook her head lightly. Ingrid was right she was so right. Wendi couldn’t leave Hogwarts. Now, she says she wants to, but come time, she wouldn’t be able to do it. It would be too hard. Wendi had friends and family at Hogwarts. It had always been her home. It had been like a first home to her. Maybe that was because her family was broken. Actually, a piece of her family was dead. Wendi loved her Gram and Gramp, but they missed Arnold and Louise. It was obvious and each day, Wendi could tell when Gram was thinking of them. She just could. “I think your right actually and it does make sense.” Wendi paused. “I don’t know. Now I just want to run, you know? I guess everyone wants to sometime in their life. I just want to run and go somewhere, anywhere.” Wendi took a breath. “I just feel so..helpless here. I mean..well, I can’t really say, but here..” Wendi couldn’t do this. She couldn’t tell anyone. Wendi wanted to leave because Keith could find her here. Here, she couldn’t do anything about Keith and stop him. Keith had his ways to get in. He could and would find her.

Wendi looked over at Ingrid. Even though Wendi did want to tell her, that Jami voice inside her head told her to stop. Wendi shook her head. She just couldn’t bring herself to finish that sentence. More tears fell. Bloody hell, she hated this. She hated the tears, the crying, and the weakness. Wendi felt completely stupid here, but she couldn’t bring herself to get up. This stop was like urging her to stay and she just couldn’t bring herself to move. Wendi’s ears clung to the words Ingrid had said. She was sixth at home? That couldn’t be fun. Wendi was more like fourth at home. Wendi had always been able to tell that in Gram and Gramp’s hearts, Arnold and Louise were always first and they always would be. Wendi shook her home. “I can’t leave here. Even though I want to. And I can’t go home. It’s a broken home really. Any home without parents is a broken home.” Wendi said breathlessly as a tear fell. “I just..” She wouldn’t be able to stop herself this time. “He’ll find me here and at home. I have no place to go.” She cried. Wendi didn’t want to be telling Ingrid this. She shook her head still crying. Keith was winning. He was going to win. He was going to find her. Keith would win and Wendi couldn’t stop him. He already won in her heart, she could feel it.

[Ingrid Lewis H4]

Ingrid smiled at Wendi and nodded, “Yeah, it really is. I have that list of spells if you want it, believe it or not it actually does come in handy.” Ingrid had gotten so tired of falling down and getting hurt and so when she had looked up all those spells, she put them to use immediately. It was so weird to think of the girl she was last year, she was so different in comparison now. Would she give anything to have that girl back? Deep down inside her, Ingrid knew that she wouldn’t. There was something about being calm and able to think things through before doing them that was appealing to her and although she missed just jumping in and doing something, this way led to less hurtful problems. If only Aaron could see it that way, but he was a hopeless case at least for now. Hopefully something would come along to wake him up. She bit back tears as she looked down at her hands. When she wasn’t with Aaron was when she was the saddest she had ever been. Aaron knew how to make her smile and laugh and just forget all the pain that she was going through. Things were still a little weird with Sita, although Ingrid wanted them to return to the way they were. Sniffing, Ingrid tucked some of her hair behind her ear and looked back at Wendi.

“So, run. Go on. It can’t be all that bad. I’ll run with you. Granted we can’t leave the Hogwarts grounds but we can run around and around the lake. We can fly over it, too. We’ll just get away for a day. Brush off classes and live out in the open.” Ingrid smiled softly and nudged Wendi, “It might not permanently solve your problem, but it might help you think of a solution. Especially since you can’t think of a reasonable one when you’re all mushy and sad.” She really had no room to talk, but Ingrid knew that running away from the school and taking a break to clear her mind had helped her get over a few things. More things just clouded her mind afterward, but she had no intention of telling Wendi that, especially because it might not happen to her. “Sometimes getting away for a couple of hours is really all you need to think of a good way out of a problem. Even curling up with a box of chocolates and a good book can help. Really, most of the time all you need is alone time to think. Many of us just run from the thoughts that we don’t want to face, but the only way to deal with them is to face them. Running from them won’t do any good, because they’ll always come right back.”

Ingrid had never had a ‘broken home’ in the sense that Wendi was talking about. Her parents were always there and she had 6 other siblings to make up for more than enough, but sometimes Ingrid felt so lonely in her huge family. That was always where Sita came in. Sita had always made her feel wanted and welcomed. When Ingrid thought about how she had been treating her best friend recently, she felt sick to her stomach and more tears welled into her eyes. Sita was everything to her and she had shoved her aside like an unwanted meal. Why had she done that? Would Sita ever forgive her completely? The thoughts were constantly circling Ingrid’s head and she would answer them if she knew the answers to them. She didn’t though, and this was where Ingrid was stuck.

“Wait, what? Who will find you?” Ingrid brought her mind back into the conversation, her eyes sparkling with confuse. “I don’t mean to pry, and if you’d rather not tell me, it’s completely understandable, but… Wendi if you’re in danger I think you should talk to a professor or someone. It can’t be a good thing by what you said. If you meant something completely different, then tell me,” Ingrid smiled awkwardly, “otherwise you’re giving me a heart attack for nothing.”