Post by Ariane Chan on Jan 19, 2009 21:07:09 GMT
I was meant to be sending this to Izy only, but I might as well share this with everyone and see what you guys think. (: I basically need to write some creative writing for one of my university applications, and I dug out some of my old work to find this poem. I've done a bit of editing and shown it to my teacher, who likes it. Still, I wanted Izy's opinion and it can't help to gather more. (: Um, I'm not really much of a poet; it's not too difficult but I never think too much about it, so... yeah. It's not really amazing or anything. ><
Oh, and it's untitled, lol.
(I can't get the spacing right on here, so I've used lots of full stops (periods) to get the layout right. ^^;
It’s 6am.
Birds crow in the morning sun
the leaves whistle a tuneless song
as dawn awakens
Bodies stir and floorboards
creak.
Footsteps against tiles
pitter-patter
Here we go again
down
........down
................down
to the hob, it’s cold. The ice spreads
like poison
veins of blue fire
Fingers graze switches, light floods
tired faces,
adjust
to harsh reality
At the table we convene
tell stories of our dreams
laugh the hour away until we
separate.
See you tonight
......................Or maybe even later.
Turn to stare at the window, because it’s never
goodbye
Walk
one step at a
time.
Climb into the car
go go go.
The traffic thrums
horns blare, lights flash
It’s chaos
and yet so living it hurts.
You breathe as you hit
home
join the throng that is your second
family.
The other pedestrians tip-tapping
behind you
Smile to no one
in particular
no one really wants to know
no one really wants to care.
The door opens
closes and
you’re in again
climb ominous stairs, reach
an office so untidy that leaflets cling
to edges
of tables, paper falls
.............................from cabinets
like leaves.
You’re home.
Oh, and it's untitled, lol.
(I can't get the spacing right on here, so I've used lots of full stops (periods) to get the layout right. ^^;
It’s 6am.
Birds crow in the morning sun
the leaves whistle a tuneless song
as dawn awakens
Bodies stir and floorboards
creak.
Footsteps against tiles
pitter-patter
Here we go again
down
........down
................down
to the hob, it’s cold. The ice spreads
like poison
veins of blue fire
Fingers graze switches, light floods
tired faces,
adjust
to harsh reality
At the table we convene
tell stories of our dreams
laugh the hour away until we
separate.
See you tonight
......................Or maybe even later.
Turn to stare at the window, because it’s never
goodbye
Walk
one step at a
time.
Climb into the car
go go go.
The traffic thrums
horns blare, lights flash
It’s chaos
and yet so living it hurts.
You breathe as you hit
home
join the throng that is your second
family.
The other pedestrians tip-tapping
behind you
Smile to no one
in particular
no one really wants to know
no one really wants to care.
The door opens
closes and
you’re in again
climb ominous stairs, reach
an office so untidy that leaflets cling
to edges
of tables, paper falls
.............................from cabinets
like leaves.
You’re home.
It'll definitely be an asset for your portfolio. I think a title would also be an asset, although I can't think of one that would quite fit.