Butterbeer and Cigarettes ((India))

[Olivia Dawson S6]

Olivia couldn't wait to get out of this prison. She would normally be gone by now, but she had promised Elle she would spend time with her today. They were eating popcorn and watching a movie. It wasn't exactly the horror movies she enjoyed watching, but she owed her little sister. She felt so bad that Elle was stuck here all day while her favorite sister spent hours at a time away from home. Elle really loved her, and didn't treat her like the invisible girl her mother and younger brother did. If spending time with Elle meant watching two and a half hours of some sappy romance movie, that was fine. Elle had many friends she could have been with today, but she turned them all down to spend time with her big sister. She had to admire Elle for that. She smiled as she saw a small tear slide down Elle's face when the breakup scene occurred. Olivia rose from her seat to get some more popcorn. As soon as the movie was over, she was to go into Hogsmeade with her sister. It had taken hours of fighting to get her to go, but it was finally going to happen. She placed another bag of popcorn in the microwave. She turned around and saw the horrible slim figure of her mother, looking like she had some second thoughts about letting Elle go with her.

"Why are you doing this to me?" She said coldly, pretending to look hurt.

"What? Treating Elle to-" Laura let out a loud shrill sound that sounded like a dying bird.

"DON'T CALL HER THAT! HER NAME IS MICHELLE, DAMN IT! CALL HER BY HER NAME!" She said shrilly.

"Alright, so it's bad that I'm treating Michelle to lunch and anything else she wants and getting her off your hands for the day." Olivia folded her arms and raised her eyebrow.

"That would be fine if it was someone else taking her out." She said with her eyes narrowed. Olivia couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Olivia said, her voice rising.

"It means..." She said, struggling to keep her voice calm. "You are not the best example in the world young lady! Do you think I want to see my youngest daughter walk back into this house with one of those death sticks in her mouth?" Olivia chuckled.

"Mother, you don't seriously think..." Laura cut her off.

"I don't know what to think of this, Olivia! You are the worst little piece of scum I have ever seen walk into this house! I don't want my little Michelle to turn out that way! She's not going, and that's my final word!" Olivia was so angry, she felt like slapping the horrible woman across the face.

"YOU CAN'T KEEP HER LOCKED UP FOREVER LAURA! YOU JUST REMEMBER THAT!" Olivia screamed as she grabbed her coat and walked upstairs to the fireplace. She was just vanishing into flames when she saw Elle sitting on the couch, crying her eyes out. Their day of fun and relaxation wasn't going to happen. Not today, not ever. Not with that creature around. She couldn't believe her mother could say such things to her.

The fireplace emptied out into the The Three Broomsticks. She took her desired seat by the window. She wanted to cry. She wanted to cry her eyes out until her eyes were dry. But she wouldn't let herself do it. She wasn't going to break down and fall apart. She just lit a cigarette and ordered a butterbeer. She was taking a long drag when she felt one small tear fall down her face. She let it sit there and dry, until finally, the tear was gone. She exhaled the smoke in her lungs and let it out with a puff of smoke. This place was far too crowded, too full of people. She needed to get away. Olivia picked up her mug of butterbeer and walked off.

She passed many stores and shops, all packed with people trying to cool down on this hot summer day. Olivia couldn't help but notice that everyone was accompanied by someone else. Either by a girlfriend or boyfriend, a parent, or by their older sister. Olivia had no one. She sighed as she took another drag and turned the corner into a clear field that opened up into the grounds surrounding the shrieking shack. Olivia did not wish to enter, but not because she was afraid. The walk was far too long and there was nothing to do inside but stare at cobwebs and walk around creaky floors. She had been inside the shack before, and it wasn't all that interesting. Her cigarette had reached the butt and Olivia removed another from her pocket. She lit the thing and looked around. There was one figure standing in the distance, a figure Olivia knew to be India Nightingale's. They had met previously before, but weren't exactly good friends. Olivia walked up to India with a half smile.

"Hey India. I'm Olivia, we met a couple times before." Olivia looked down at her cigarette and felt guilty for not offering India one.

"You want a smoke? I've got plenty." Olivia held out her pack of cigarettes and wondered if India would take one.

[India Nightingale]

India stepped out of the shop she had just Floo-ed from, dusting her robes off and letting out a long sigh of relief, breathing in the deep air gratefully. She abhorred Flooing, but if she had to do so to get away from that stupid creature she called her twin sister, India was almost happy to do it. Hogsmeade was probably one of the last places she’d go, but it was better than having to go to Diagon Alley, too many people bustling around, shopping for supplies. India really had needed a fresh gulp of air, and Hogsmeade had been the first place she had thought of. She was really glad her self control her forced her to storm to the fireplace rather than go and give Skye another earful, because India knew it wasn’t worth her time and efforts. Already the anger was draining from her system, leaving India feeling decidedly alone and empty. Where was Duke when you needed him? India thought remorsefully. Her guardian angel had zipped off for more work that morning, and India hadn’t even gotten a glimpse of his back before he had stalked out of the mansion’s double doors, leaving India staring after him in a silk black nightgown, hair in disarray, panting heavily, only because she had wanted to say goodbye to him.

Sighing softly, India trudged silently down several cobbled pathways, until she finally reached the Hog’s Head. India always preferred this pub to The Three Broomsticks, because there were always so many people in the latter one, having always been the popular place to hang out with adults and teens alike. Entering the dingy pub, India glanced around swiftly, taking in the lack of customers with a grim smile, before stalking in and sitting down on a seat, immediately ordering a butter beer for the sake of it. Letting her head sink into her hands almost helplessly, India thought back to the stupid reason why she had blown up at Skye again. It was to do with the grocery shopping Skye had done a few days ago, and the silly girl hadn’t bought India’s required things again, though Skye’s excuse was that there weren’t any at the time. India had thrown her usual fit, and stormed out of the house, neglecting her lunch as per usual, much to Skye’s chagrin. This was probably the hundredth time an argument with her twin had sent India flying out of the house, one time having resulted in her first meeting with Drake Manning. Casting the memory from her mind with a groan, India was alerted to reality when the butter beer clumped onto her table carelessly, spilling over the sides and washing onto the wooden table.

The bartender obviously didn’t care, stomping off after India paid him without much thought. She ignored the protests of her stomachs again as she brought the beverage to her lips, taking a long draught of it with closed eyes. The immediate warmth that flooded her senses brought the smallest of calm smiles to India’s pained face, and she drained the drink in less than ten minutes, when usually she sat there lonesomely, pondering over everything and anything and taking her time doing nothing. Perhaps it was the numbness the butter beer provided, and was reminded of her fleeting meeting with Drake, the numbness she had felt then. That familiar sensation of tingling in her brain, in her fingers, on her lips. It had been nice. Though India hadn’t remembered much afterwards, that was for sure. Abruptly, India stood, and leaving her glass on the table, walked out of the Hog’s Head and into the refreshingly cool air again. Taking another grateful gulp of it, glad to be away from the stuffy castle back in Scotland, India let her legs lead to where they felt like, and in the end, that was to the Shrieking Shack. Now India had rarely ever come here, and looked on curiously, arms folded across her chest. She was rather cold, though she didn’t know why, and suddenly wished she had more butter beer by her side.

Suddenly, a voice knocked India’s attention away from the her shivering form, doing her best to hide it under her robes. Turning, India’s eyes landed on the familiar figure of Olivia Dawson, a girl in her house, but in the year below. Blinking, India felt her usual indifferently cold expression form on her face, and stared at Olivia as she talked on. She nodded when the girl stated they had met a few times before, which was true. Sometimes in the Common Room, sometimes during the few times India had lunch… She knew a few things about Olivia, and one of them was that she wasn’t much of a Slytherin, and secondly that she smoked. India supposed she was almost notorious for it, just like she was famous for her identical features but differing personality to her Gryffindor twin, Skye. India guessed Olivia obviously hadn’t heard much about her and her personality, otherwise she didn’t think the girl would approach her so casually and almost friendlily every single time. India blinked repeatedly when Olivia offered her a cigarette, and staring at them, she shook her head slowly. “Thanks. But no thanks.” India found her voice saying aloud. People would expect someone like her to smoke, but the fact of the matter was, India had never been that type of girl. She was more likely to drink… as India had discovered recently. “What are you doing here, Olivia?” India asked bluntly.

[Olivia Dawson S6]

Olivia may have been a smoker, but she surely wasn't one to force a cigarette on someone else. If they didn't want it, it was perfectly fine with her. Some people didn't like the placid smoke curling from the end of the stick. Some fell into the stereotype that smoking was horrible. Others just didn't want anything to do with a cigarette. It was all fine with Olivia. She was a very easy going person. Whatever was meant to happen will happen. End of story. There was nothing she could do about it. It was all fine with her, as long as she had her cigarettes. Olivia knew she would be a much different person without them. She would be much more emotional, with much more anger and rage trapped inside her body. Smoking cigarettes was Olivia's way of letting it all out without hurting anyone. They had kept her going, kept her from going insane. She would never let them go, no matter what others told her. She knew she wouldn't have liked it if someone tried to make her quit smoking. She remembered back to the time when she was thirteen, when her mother tried to make her quit. No daughter of mine is going to be smoking those damned Death Sticks, Olivia! She remembered slapping her mother in the face. Then maybe I'm not your daughter! I'm not giving these up! Especially not to YOU! She had screamed, as she stormed out of the house. She hadn't returned for three days after that, and when she did, her mother gave her away to the city of London, never to be truly part of the family again.

Olivia sighed as she stared at the Shrieking Shack, listening to the wind whistle in her ears. It was such a peaceful sound. Olivia took a drag of her own cigarette and let out a puff of smoke, making sure to keep it out of India's face. India Nightingale was one to get very angry, very quickly. She remembered someone telling her about India's mute sister Skye, who was a Gryffindor in the year above her. They had never got along well, and rumor was that India had caused her sister's inability to talk. Olivia didn't believe in the spread of rumors; she liked to hear information from the person themselves, rather than hearing it from their friend's sister's cousin's uncle's niece's acquaintance's son's best mate. Words tended to change as a person told the story. A rumor can go from 'India has a twin whom she doesn't get along with' all the way over to 'India has a twin sister who is mute AND in Gryffindor AND India was the one that caused it AND they hated each other.' The story could have very easily been bended by word of mouth.

India asked what she was doing here. There were a number of reasons why Olivia was here. There was the fact that her mother wouldn't let her own two daughters spend the day together. It wasn't like Olivia was evil or anything, the only thing that could possibly be wrong with her was that she smoked. It wasn't a crime. It was still legal. Olivia mentally rolled her eyes at the thought of her mother scolding her and answered India's question.

"I needed to get out of the house. My mum was being extremely aggravating. Although, I must say, I don't think I'm even considered a Dawson anymore, apparently I'm just the biggest piece of scum that walked into the Dawson household." Olivia let out a puff of smoke. "What about you? What are you doing all the way out here by the shrieking shack?" Olivia glanced over at the large old house and waited for India to reply.

[India Nightingale]

India took in Olivia’s words with a blank expression, her eyes unblinking as they turned slowly to stare impassively at the Slytherin’s face. Smoke curled off into the air, grey wisps fading into the atmosphere. India had never liked the smell of smoke, but she wasn’t about to ridicule Olivia for it. It was her life, her decisions. India didn’t stick her nose into other people’s business, and she expected the same respect. Olivia’s words initially struck her as though she was looking for sympathy from India, because that’s exactly what the girl would’ve received had she told this story to someone else. India wondered if Olivia was indeed making a big deal out of nothing, exaggerating her situation for attention, or if she was telling the truth. India didn’t expect other people had as difficult a life as she had. The selfish, conceited part of her liked to believe she herself led the most tormented, suffering path of all human kind. In that kind of way, India wanted to think she was special. She knew it wasn’t something to be proud of… but then again, India needed that reassurance sometimes, however selfish she was being, because otherwise she’d go crazy and do something much more selfish.

India decided to give Olivia the benefit of the doubt. Her tone was more disgusted than proud of herself, and India could understand that. Many Slytherins put on fronts, she knew that from experience because she was one of those people herself. However, many Slytherins did not bother thinking their fellow classmates had fronts too, which was ironic. That, India knew inside, she also could understand. Olivia wasn’t one for attention, India felt, and from what she had heard (though she didn’t believe anything for a second); plus she had to admit other people had difficult lives too, and India shouldn’t just cast Olivia’s words into the false pile just because she thought she was the most special person in the world. What Olivia was saying… about her mother, about her family, may be true, India mused. Perhaps Olivia was lonelier than she looked.

India’s gaze finally dragged away from staring at Olivia, to the Shrieking Shack in accordance to the girl’s question. If she had honestly answered this, India would’ve said she needed to get away from her psychotic twin who was the bane of her life, who made her crazy just by looking at that familiar face; she would’ve told Olivia about how she had no parents and there was only her in this world, an insignificant child; how the one person she loved, Duke, was never there for her even though she felt that she didn’t need anybody. There was a lot to India than met the eye, but she doubted if she said all that out loud, Olivia would’ve believed her. Anyone would think India was making a big deal out of nothing. So against her better judgement, India decided to believe Olivia’s words, and answered the question as honestly as possible herself. “I’m here for no reason.” India’s voice was quiet and low as she watched said place. “I go where my feet take me.” She gave a nonchalant shrug. “You’re not the only one who needs to get out of the house.” India eyed Olivia with her usual cold expression, but she felt a warmth curl around her heart. Was this feeling understanding?

[Olivia Dawson S6]

India looked at her with a disbelieving face. She didn't believe a word of it. Olivia wouldn't either, if it was her. She would think Oh wah! So your mother doesn't like you very much! Welcome to the club! In fact, Olivia's first guess would be that the person was exaggerating, craving attention. She would think that this person had nothing better to do than to whine to random strangers who really didn't care about what was going on in her life. Only, she was Olivia. She was the smoker who was whining about her problems. India was the one listening to her, wondering why Olivia had told her this. Olivia didn't really know herself why she had opened her mouth to begin with. Olivia usually kept her problems to herself, never letting anyone on to what she was feeling. She almost never let her guard down, her feeling were usually locked up in a cage, held back by a lock that was her cigarettes. They had usually kept her from overreacting. They kept her in peace, which was why she smoked them so much. But Olivia still didn't understand why she had shared such a personal piece of information to a person like India Nightingale, who would just glare at her.

India shivered again. This was curious, very curious indeed. Why on earth would India be shivering in ninety degree weather? Olivia in fact was getting rather hot in her ripped jeans and short black t-shirt. She tied her hair up, which was at the moment a dirty blond mess of braids and put it into a pony tail. She couldn't understand how India could be cold. She did think about the fact that some people got cold very easily, sometimes in even the hottest of climates. Still though, the shivering was a bit strange. Olivia decided to butt out of India's business and return to their conversation after an extended period of awkward silence. It wasn't like a bit of shivering mattered much to her. It didn't affect Olivia's life in any way.

India told her about her feet just carrying her over to the Shrieking shack. It was understandable, Olivia did it all the time. She would just be walking somewhere along the streets of Diagon Alley, and somehow she would end up in an ice cream shop, or even Borgin and Burkes in Knockturn Alley. She had no idea how she ended up in such places, but it often happened. Somehow though, Olivia sensed that she wasn't getting the whole story. It didn't matter to her why India was really at the Shrieking shack, but she could tell India wasn't telling her the whole truth. She took another drag from her cigarette and let it out in small smoke rings. She had learned how to do that just last year. Her friend had taught her. She watched silently as the smoke rose up into the air in small smoke rings. She watched as they dissolved into the air, followed by a few more. India made a small comment that would normally have meant nothing to Olivia, had it not been for the tone it was used in. India very coldly stated that she was not the only one that needed to get out of the house. India had her own home life that had bothered her a great deal. India knew how Olivia felt. She was probably just as hated by her family as she was. She could see the look in her eyes. It was a look of loneliness. The same look that resided in Olivia's eyes at that very moment.

"I take it you don't like it at home?" This was a rather dumb question, considering India had just bluntly pointed out that she didn't like it at home, and sought to get away. She glanced at her cigarette, which was almost done. Smoke curled weakly from the end. She dropped it to the ground and stepped on it. She then removed another from her pocket and lit it up. She looked back at India, waiting for an answer.

[India Nightingale]

India almost sighed out loud. Was Olivia completely dense and stupid or something? Hadn’t she just told this stranger in black and white very clearly – she didn’t like home. Was it not obvious? India felt that everything she said was definitely lost on this silly girl. Fixing Olivia with a penetrating gaze, India controlled any anger and frustration she felt and pushed it lower and lower in her mind, into the very corners, though she didn’t bother excluding any iciness from her tone. “I think I pretty much said that, yeah.” India replied haughtily with a disbelieving shake of her head. Black waves cascades over her ears, across her shoulders and warming her neck. It wasn’t that cold, being the end of summer; this year, the weather had been lenient, somewhat. No gigantic thunderstorms, not intense heat that soared beyond the norm. But although today, the sky was fair, only a few white clouds marring the perfect sky, India still felt rather chilled to the bone, though dismissed the thought that it was just her mind playing psychology tricks on her. India was not insane.

Spying an unoccupied bench nearby, India gratefully stalked over and sat down, folding her arms across her chest and looking at Olivia blankly. India admittedly felt a little weak, and sitting down made sure she didn’t pass out from standing up for too long. Especially in front of Olivia, someone she barely knew, in the middle of an area India usually wouldn’t be found in, where no one she related to her (… Duke or Skye) would have any hope of discovering her fainted body. Not a good idea. India watched as more smoke drifted out of Olivia’s cigarette butt, glad she wasn’t filling her own insides with toxins and tar, and whatever else those little, “harmless” things held within. India could tremble at the thought of how much internal damage those cigarettes could do to one’s body. India would not be so weak as be reliant on something like that. The thought was just… sickening. Though India felt that if Olivia wished to smoke her life away, then she could. Also, there could possibly be a reason Olivia did it. People did things for reasons, India knew this best. She hated Skye for a reason. She was afraid of fire for a reason. She couldn’t take her own reflection for a reason. She didn’t trust people for a reason. She hated her body for a reason. There were many reasons in the world people were just not aware of.

“You obviously don’t like home too.” India began after a short silence. Olivia probably had a reason for this, just like she had a reason why she didn’t want to go home right now too. She wasn’t particularly interested in making conversation with Olivia, but she had nothing better to do, and she might as well take her mind off particular things. “All this childish crap about perfect homes and perfect families.” India added with a derisive snort. “Ridiculous.” She wondered absently if Olivia would agree with her on this. Perhaps. She sounded like she hated going home just as much as India did sometimes. After all, whose family called one “scum”? India thought to herself. Even India didn’t live in one of those households right now, though she once had, and never wanted to again. She would forever hate Tim and his stupid face and stupid words… Even if he was dead, India hated him. He had made a great deal of her life torturous, but India didn’t wish anymore bad luck on the horrible man. He was dead already. How much more suffering could you take after that? There was no more, after death. India sometimes wished her death would come early and take her away. Because sometimes, there was nothing… or no one, worth living for.