You Can't Always Get What You Want ((Closed))

[Mackenzie Holden]

"What the hell do you mean, 'double track'?!" Mack asked Julian as she followed him into the studio. This totally sucks! Double tracking with some...rapper?! Mack felt a scowl cross her face, and she found an unoccupied seat, in the 18 year olds office. Julian sighed and leaned against his desk, his arms crossed, "You know what I mean, Mack. You'll do a track with Nick Sharpe, and it'll go on both of your CD's." He explained calmly. Anger flared through Mack. Who the hell did these people think they were?! She wasn't going to waster her time, "recording", with some "rap star." She refused to.

"I can not believe I'm doing this..." She breathed later that day. Her eyes closed as the door opened, she didn't want to see him. But she was shoved out of her darkness by Julian. So much for that idea... Mack relunctantly opened her blue eyes. In front of them stood two people who looked to be related. The same smooshed nose, lopsided grin, and square shaped head, was noticable in both of the Sharpe's in front of her. The older one shook hands with Julian, while the younger seemed to be checking her out. Mack scowled again, "My face is up a bit, Nick." The other two guys chuckled as Nick merely smiled and held out his hand, "I'm honoured to be recording with such a beautiful woman as yourself." Mack felt like she was going to hurl. She had let him shake her hand, but when he went to press it to his dark lips, Mack pulled it back hastily; "Let's get one thing straight, Sharpe, I'm not interested in you in any way, shape, or form; clear?" More chuckling. What was wrong with these guys?! Nick draped his right arm over her shoulder and mumbled something, clearly American slang. She sent him a glare while removing his arm from around her, "In case your dumb American brain can't comprehend what that means, it means don't touch me or try to sweet talk me. Just, don't speak to me." Mack sent Julian a look that could kill and entered the recording booth, wanted this done with.

"Wait! Wait! Wait! Cut! Hold up!" Nick said, waving his arms as if he was landing an airplane. And with those bright flashy clothes, he probably could. Mack groaned and slipped her headphones off, letting them hang aruond her neck, "What now?!" She asked, clearly frustrated. They had been doing this for five hours, and frankly Mack was getting tired. Nick always found something wrong with her parts of the song, "What could possibly be wrong now?! You've pointed out almost every God damned mistake there was, and even made some up!" This only caused Nick to smirk at her and turn to the producers.

"She's late coming in," He said,"again." The "again" part was directed to Mack. She crossed her arms, her anger too much to hold back now, "When did you become an expert on timing?! Your chorus is always late, and you're not on the beat." Mack moistened her lips and raised an eyebrow. Nick glared at her, "Yuor music is wana-be rock, mine at least has rhythm, so I know pleanty about beat." He shot back. Mack snorted, "This is coming from the guy who doesn't even write his own lyrics? I bet you couldn't even compost a grocery list without Jacob holding your hand!" There was a stunned silence, and finally Jacob's voice came over the intercom; "She didn't mean that, Nick." In unison, Mack and Nick both said she did, and she had. It was the one thing they agreed on all day.

[Mackenzie Holden]

Mack put her hands over her ears, covering only the slightest of Julian's rant about her blond hair. OK so she had dyed it back to her natural colour, the colour that she had before she met her producer. He told her that the red hair added a flare to her image- but Mack could care less. If she was being forced to sing with Nick, she was going to look her way. She lowered her hands and looked up at Julian with a semi-sorry smile on her face, though she wasn't sorry at all. Julian ran his fingers through his hair and nodded, "Alright! It'll work! C'mon. Let's start! Into the booth, now! We don't have all day!" She stood and entered the recording booth, taking her place opposite of Nick who seemed to be more relaxed today.

"Hey, look, I just wanna get through today- make Julian happy for a bit. Is that alright with you?" She asked with a quick raise of her eyebrow. Nick chewed his bottom lip and nodded slowly before holding out his hand, "A'ight. We cool." Mack shook his hand, and slipped her headphones on as Julian and Jacob talked. The music then started and Mack began to sing, "Friends are telling me I lost my mind. When I hooked up with you. Maybe that's true. Said that I'll wake up one day. Asking what did I do? Maybe that's true too. When I'm with you everything's alright. All I know is how I feel. When you're with me. Waste my time. Waste my time. Not so sure that I'll be yours, but baby you can be mine. It's all about, hangin' out. 'Cause you know how to waste my time. Nothin' like an empty day. With nowhere to be. You're right there with me. Laughing as the world goes by. How we let the day. Moving way too fast. 'Cause when I'm with you I don't really care. What they all want me to be. I just want you beside me."

She smiled as she realised that Nick wasn't going to interrupt her. He was tapping his foot to the beat, and looking at her as if she was someone new- "Waste my time. Waste my time. Not so sure that I'll be yours, but baby you can be mine. It's all about hangin' out. "Cause you know how to waste my time." Mack's blue eyes looked up at Nick as he began his part;

"Call me Nick on the M-I-C. When you listenin' to me, you be listenin' to the b bumpin'. To the rhythm they'll be given' when we hit 'em with the beats on the streets. Don't forget the way we livin' yo." Mack interrupted quietly with , "waste my time.." And he continued- "Cute girl on the other side of the wall. (waste my time) I like the way you move your body and if you fall (not so sure that I'll be yours). I'll be the one that's gonna catch you before you hit the ground (baby you can be mine). I'm feeling your sound." And they cut for the day.

Mack sighed as she took a drink out of her bottled water. she smiled at Julian as she left the studio and headed back to her apartment. Only one more verse and one more chorus and they would be finished. She pulel dout her keys and slipped them in the lock, turned it and stepped inside with another triumphant sigh. Her sister was on teh couch watching design television and she could hear Pam in the office talking to the fireplace. Derreck was probably off with his girlfriend, Mack wondered if she would get another half-sister. She smirked at that thought and headed towards her room.

[Mackenzie Holden]

Lying on her bed. Staring up at her ceiling. Mack thought. She thought about Jack. She thought about Claira and Samantha. She thought about Derreck. She thought about Nick. She thought about life and how it would be like to end it. Mack sighed at the last thought and rolled over onto her stomach. She debated whether or not to call Jack. THe side that said no won. Was she slipping into a depression? Lately life had been so complicated. She had a half-sister from her fathers affair with another woman not Kristie. And to top it off, she wasn't sure what was going on with her and Jack.

Mack shook her head violently, as if she could give herself an injury- nothing worked. She slid off her bed and looked underneath the dust ruffels and pulled out a shoe box. In the box was pictures. Millions of them. Of Dix and her growing up. Mack's eyes fluttered over the photos, wondering why she wasn't able to remember anything before the age of 5. She was sure there were happy memories in their some where. Mack shoved the box under her bed again and stood up from her spot on the floor.

The smell of dinner wafted into her nostrils. Ever sicne Dix turned 17, she ha dbeen cooking a lot more. It was as if she thought she was the woman of the house now that mom was busy working all the time. Mack mentally rolled her eyes and entered the silver kitchen, sniffing longily. she headed over to teh stove and peered into the pot that was simmering with noodles. Mack wrinkled her nose, "Spaghetti again?" She asked annyed. Dix shooed her out with a dish towel and she walked into the living room. Pondering againw hether or not to call Jack. Again, the no side won.

"Mack, someone's here for you..." Dixie called from the kitchen. Mack didn't move. She just pulled her leg up onto the couch and watched the television. Jamie walked in and sat next to her, licorice in his hands. She smiled and took one before snuggling up to him and letting go. She let tears slide down her face and fall onto his shirt. She cried and cried and cried. Jamie sat there, not knowing what to do- finally he started to calm her down. When she was capable of audible words, he said; "Start from the beginning..."

[Mackenzie Holden]

So she did. She began from her kidnapping. To Claira's birth. Mack watched Jamie's face for any sign of surprise, or hatred toward her father. But none came. He was still as stone, and for a second that bothered Mack. But then she thought it might be better that he wasn't showing any emotion, because she mightn't like the emotion he was showing. She sighed as she finished. Jamie spoke:

"Well, Mack, I'm sure..."

"NO! Jamie! You don't understand! This and the fact that I don't know what is going on between Jack and I is too much!" She screeched at him- more tears coming from her eyes. Though she hadn't realised her mistake until his eyes flared with anger and jealousy and he stood up as if he were going to leave. Mack watched him, slightly afraid of this new Jamie.

"You and Jack?" Though his anger was apparent on his face, you couldn't tell it by his voice. Mack nodded slowly. And she thought he was going to attack the nearest human being that resembled Jack. She watched as he attacked the wall instead. Soon there was a large hole where his fist was, and he was breathing heavily. He walked toward Mack, and she stood up- jumping about seven feet in the air.

"Mack! You're so naive! He doesn't like you!" Now it was Mack's turn to be angry. Not only because he called her naive, but because she was certain Jack liked her! Or at least more certain than not, to know he doesn't dislike her. Mack advanced toward Jamie, her head tilted upward so she could glare at him directly in the eye. But she couldn't help but wonder. Wonder if he was right? Did Jack really like her? Or was he just humouring her? No. That wasn't possible. Then the harder questions came. What were they, then? Best friends, best-friends-with-benefits, or boyfriend-girlfriend? And woudl this ruin their friendship? "He's a lying sack of filth and is using you!" Mack slapped him.

"He does too! You just don't want me to know, because you like me! Jamie, I DON'T LIKE YOU!" She screamed at him. Tears in her eyes because yelling at him, hurt her so bad. Jamie was her other part. Her other soul. He is the one guy who she could go to with things about herself. Or was. She could go to Jack now, about anything. Mack shook violently and watched as Jamie turned to leave. He paused at the door.

"Fine! But when he hurts you don't come crying to me!" He yelled at her. Then he slammed the door. Mack picked up the vase that was on the table next to her and through it at him, or the door.

"DON'T WORRY, I WON'T!" She screamed so loud, she was sure he could hear her. Mack fell to the floor and cried into the carpet. Dix entered the living room ,surprise and satisfaction on her face; "Good going, Mackenzie."

[Mackenzie Holden]

It was like losing another part of her. Losing Jamie. He was her. He knew her, inside and out. He knew all her secrets, and all her fears. Jamie Andrews was the one guy in the whole world she trusted with everything. She curled into a small ball in her room, in a corner, and cried. Replaying the conversation over and over in her head. How could he blow up over something so simple? Of course, Jamie would know about things like that. Jamie was right about Timmy, and he hadn't blown up on her like he did with the whole Jack issue. Mack wiped at a few tears and looked at her guitar that was an arms reach away, but she didn't move to pick it up. She had ideas in her mind, but she didn't want to play- afraid of memories.

"Get a grip, Mack! You're going to get memories anyway!" She told herself as she stood up from her spot in the corner. She walked over to her guitar and picked it up, along with her notebook and pen. Setting her guitar on her lap, Mack opened her notebook to a clean page and wrote Verse one at the top of the page. She fingered the right strings and started to play. Playing the music once through, she began again...this time adding a few lyrics. She decided to sing what she felt, "Drift away to a place, another kind of life. Take away the pain and create my paradise. Everything I've held has hit the wall. What used to be yours isn't yours at all. Falling apart and all that I'm asking. Is it a crime, or am I overreacting?"

She copied that down and continued to play. Within thirty minutes, she had a chorus, a first verse, and a bridge. Mack put her guitar down and fell back onto her bed. She could feel the tears returning. They fell from her blue eyes and ran down her cheeks. She hadn't bothered to do her make-up so nothing was smeared, but she had a horrible headache from the crying. She sat up and looked at her wall. At all the pictures of Jamie. And sudden anger flushed through her. Who did he think he was?! Telling her who she could and could not like?! Mack stood up from her bed and tore all the pictures of her and Jamie down.

"Mack! Stop! Mack!" She felt arms encircle her and hold her tight. Mack fell to the floor, anger flooding through her even more; "He's under my skin! Just please give me something to get rid of him! I have to bury this alive! Everything he says it's a lie! Another little white lie! Here there! It's just so irritating!" Mack struggled against her father's firm hold on her. She sank to the floor in a heap, he still held her. She leaned against her father's arms as he held her, and calmed her. Why was he doing this?! Mack struggled again, but his grip was too firm, "Calm down, Mackenzie." He whispered. She sighed and looked at him.

Blue eyes locked with brown and she quickly looked away; "Why are you holding me?" She whispered to him. Derreck let go gently and stood up. Mack stood as well, staring up at her father as if she were seeing a new him. Without another word he left her, closed her door. Mack said after him, "I now know where you've been."

[Mackenzie Holden]

"You're late." Julian told her harshly. Mack walked straight into the booth, put her headphones on and waited. No music came on. She raised an eyebrow and looked at Julian who was standing in the doorway with his arms crossed. She took her headphones off, "What?" She asked. Something was up. Oh God, more bad news... she thought with a quick roll of her eyes. Julian entered the booth as well, pulled up a stool, and sat down. His eyes were dancing and he was making Mack even more anxious. She sat down as well, as if it would make everything else seem much more bearable. It didn't.

"I've been moved to a new artist." Julian told her. Mack looked at him, her eyes wide; "WHAT?!" "There's more..." Mack breathed in little gasps of air. Julian was her producer! How could they take him from her!? Mack looked to her left where Jamie would usually be, and realised he wasn't there. She felt an uneasy sense of loss and lonliness in her as she looked back at Julian. He was explaining that she was getting a new producer, from an old band called Boyz Attack. Tom Quincy. He was 21 and probably the best producer in the business. Mack doubted that, Julian was the best- she couldn't believe she was losing him. Then she realised something...

"Little Tommy Q?!" She asked, clearly revolted by the idea of having to be produced by some...heart throb boy band lead singer, "The names Tom Quincy." Said a voice a few feet away from them. Mack looked toward the door, and there he stood. In all his glory. He wore jeans, a polo shirt, and sunglasses. Mack smirked, "How about Tommy? That alright with you Tom?" She was just trying to make him angry or annoyed at least, but he merely shrugged and nodded.

Julian stood from his seat and walked over to Mack, he knelt down and whispered in her ear, "No matter what anyone says, you are the greatest. Don't let them change you. Ok, kid?" Mack nodded, though she knew without him she was defenseless. Julian left with a few words to Tommy and then there were two. Tommy took Julians's seat and looked at Mack and her guitar; "Nice instrument. So, you're the one who sang 'Let Me Fall' right?" What kind of producer didn't know their artists songs? Mack scowled, but nodded anyway. Tommy smiled; "Good. Let me hear it." And she did.

[Mackenzie Holden]

Mack yawned into her cup of coffee. The steam tickled her nose, and she looked away quickly before she sneezed into her coffee. Her mother sat precisely on a chair, and watched as Mack yawned again. She fiddled with the lyrics on the lyre and pulled the studio's electric guitar up onto her lap. She had left hers at home, and was glad to know that the studio had a rather...large collection of guitars for use. Her headphones were over her ears, and she took another sip of her coffee before looking at Tommy through the glass. He gave her a nod and she started to play.

She had dreamt of this so many times and Mack couldn't believe she actually had the chance to make her own album. Julian had been a great producer, but Tommy had so many new ideas for her image and her music. He even suggested making another album after this one was finished. They had the money for it...all that mattered was the audience's opinion. At the moment, all they were doing was the music for the song right now...and Mack was fine with that. She didn't want to sing until later anyway, she was too tired to sing.

The music took hours. And hours. Mack's eyes were getting blurry, and every now and then Tommy would refill her coffee. She had at least three cups in two hours. When it was finally finished, she collapsed into a chair in the lounge. The comfortably furnished room had a television perched on the wall, bright colours and funky furniture. It had a small kitchen, a bathroom, and a bed in the corner, "Ten minute lunch. Then back to work, Mack." Tommy spoke as he passed by. She sighed and picked up a magazine. Like she could eat now?

Ten minutes later, they were back in the booth. The chair Mack had sat on was gone, and all that was in the room was the necessary items. Her headphones slid on her head and she breathed in deeply. Tommy looked at her through the glass, his arms were crossed, and his eyebrows raised; "I'm ready." She said into the microphone. Seconds later her previously recorded music was filled into her ears and she counted the beats with her foot. Then it came:

"I drift away to a place, another kind of life. Take away the pain and create my paradise. Everything I've held has hit the wall. What used to be yours isn't yours at all. Falling apart and all that I'm asking, is it a crime, am I over-reacting? Oh, he's under my skin. Just give me something to get rid of him. I've got a reason to bury this alive. Another little white lie. So what you had didn't fit among the pretty things. Never fear, never fear. I now know where you've been. Braids have been untied, as ribbons fall away. Leave the concequence, my tears you'll taste."

"Falling apart and all that I question, is this a dream or is this my lesson? Oh, he's under my skin. Please give me something to get rid of him. I've got a reason now to bury this alive. Another little white lie. I don't believe I'll be alright. I don't believe I'll be okay. I don't believe how you throw me away. I do believe you didn't try. I do blame you for every lie. When I look in your eyes I don't see mine."

"Oh, he's under my skin. Just give me something to get rid of him. I've got a reason now to bury this alive. Another little white lie. Oh, my permission to sin. You might've started my reckoning. I've got a reason now to bury him alive. Another little white lie." Mack finished the song and lowered her head. She felt hot tears hitting her eyes and she couldn't help but let at least one fall. She looked back up to see surprised faces. She took off her headphones and left the booth, full on tears now.

Voices were echoing around her, and she wasn't aware of who was speaking until someone grabbed her arms which were crossed, "Mack..." Tommy whispered. She couldn't hold it back. She lowered her head onto his shoulder and continued to cry while saying; "I hate them..I hate them..."

[Mackenzie Holden]

Her head was leaning against the glass of the windows, her red hair fell over her shoulders and it was practically the only ‘cheery’ thing in the car. Mack watched the lights zoom by ever so fast and her eyes began to close. The music came pumping through the speakers, but it wasn’t so loud that she couldn’t fall asleep. She was so tired. After all, Tommy had her get up at 5 in the morning. Mack scowled mentally at that angry thought and she opened her eyes again. They weren’t even half-way home. She let her thoughts wander to Jamie. Why did he act like that? Why did he have to ruin their friendship over something…so little? Mack yawned and closed her eyes once more, she would figure it all out when she was awake.

“I don’t want to wake her…” A familiar voice said from her left. Mack wasn’t awake awake yet, and she felt arms encircle her and pick her up. It was then she opened both eyes, “What are you doing?” She snapped. It surprised Tommy and he dropped her onto the wet grass. Mack fell not as softly as she possibly would like, and got as wet as she possibly could when she was just dropped onto dewy grass.

“A normal person would slightly shake the other and say, ‘hey you, get up’ but you aren’t normal, are you Tommy? You just had to drop me on a grass of dew, didn’t you?” Mack stood up and brushed the loose grass from her jeans. Tommy smiled down apologetically and draped an arm over her shoulder. She didn’t shrug him off- considering he had just spent the last two hours wiping her tears and telling her it was going to be alright. She had met the guy two or three days ago, Mack wasn’t too sure, and she was already feeling as if he were an older brother.

Pam opened the door and they entered the dimly lit room. Dixie had already gone to bed, and Derreck hadn’t returned home as usual. Mack walked into the living room and collapsed onto the sofa. Her red hair flew around her as if it were wild, and Mack started to doze off. Well, she would have if Tommy hadn’t nudged her awake:

“I did it right this time…” He told her, picking up her legs and sitting down, then letting her legs fall on top of him. Mack grunted in reply and looked at Tommy. Pam had gone upstairs for bed, and it was just them. Tommy looked at her and sighed: “Are you going to tell me what made you write that song?” He asked. Mack shook her head, no. She wouldn’t. Not unless it slipped out.
He sighed again:

“Alright. I’m here though, ok? Anything you need, I’m here for you…” Mack laughed.

“You and the rest of the world.” She rolled over onto her side and slipped her legs off so he could get up.

“I’ll see you round.” And he was gone. Mack yawned one last time and fell asleep right there.

[Mackenzie Holden]

Mack woke up to someone shoving her off the couch, she rolled onto the white carpet and shrieked, jumping up- "What the hell?!" A man stared down at her with black eyes, and she backed into a wall- trying to get away from him. Mack looked to her left where Pam and Dixie stood. Her older sister held her mother's hand who was sobbing into a handkerchief, "What's going on?" Mack sidestepped to be next to her mother.

"Mum?" She asked- seeing her mother in tears two months ago would have satisfied Mack, but now it just made her cringe with hurt for the woman. Dixie lowered her head and whispered:

"He's taking everything. Apparently this girlfriend is more than an infatuation. He came home early this morning, and threw some papers at mum stating that he owns everything in this place- including your things and the house. Mum's devestated." Dixie sighed and patted her mother's back before turning to the front door. Derreck Holden stood there, his arms crossed and a timid looking girl behind him. She didn't seem to be much older than 19, "He what?" Mack asked Dixie, though her eyes were glued on the girl behind her father.

"That's it, boys, into the truck- all of it. Make sure you hit all the rooms as well. I don't want anything they have touched in this house. Lord knows I'll have to clean this place from top to bottom." Derreck was saying. This made Mack scowl and step toward him, "What do you think you are doing?" She snapped.

"Taking what is rightfully mine, and what I want." He answered smugly. Mack looked at the girl behind him and glared such a harsh glare it made the girl back furhter away. She turned back to Derreck.

"So, you're just going to sit there and did what you did to Samantha Stone, to us? Nice, Dad. You can't go around treating people like they are nothing. It isn't right. You can't always get what you want. And the things you do get, you deserve." Mack crossed her arms and glared harshly at him. Something flashed in Derreck's eyes, was it disbelief or fright? She wasn't sure, but she liked what she saw.

"Watch how you talk to me..."

"No! You watch how you treat me! You're off galloping into the woods with your little sweety tootsie pop over there, and you think I'm going to sit by and let you? There are laws, dad! Laws that you must abide, no matter what social status you are. I know, once you move out of here and get settled with your new bit- you're going to do the same to her as you did to us and Samantha and her daughter Claira. I know. She might not know it, you might not know it, but I know it."

"I'm warning you, Mackenzie..."

"Mack...don't." Dixie said loud enough for them to hear. But she didn't stop, and she did continue.

"Did you know you have a 10 year old daughter with another woman? And that she's the spitting image of you? She's attending our school this coming fall and you aren't even aware of it. Not that I expected anything less, you're a man who can't love anybody but yourself and the power you have." Mack grabbed her jacket and pulled it on her shoulders, she headed toward the door.

"Take him away. He's in your life now, he's your problem. Good luck, I hope you live through it." Mack told the girl with a smirk and she was gone.

[Mackenzie Holden]

The doors swung open so fast that it made such a loud noise. Doris looked up from her files she was looking through and saw the image of Mackenzie Holden storming through the front lobby into the lounge. Tommy came out of the coffee room just in time to see Mack push past him. She was wearing the same clothes as yesterday and looked like she had gone to bed in her make-up. She continued to walk right into the booth and grab a guitar. With the electric guitar in hand, she headed back out into the lounge. It was as stylish as it had been the night before. Mack plugged her guitar into the amp and hit a chord, then started to play a song that came to mind so fast she wondered if she could remember later on to write it down:

"I've been sittin' in the dirt. For 24 hours. I've forgotten my own worth. For 24 hours. Said that you'd be here last night. Ooh. I'm trying to shake you from my skin. For 48 hours. Clean up this mess I've been put in. For 48 hours. I'm guessing you can't always win. I'm guessing you can't always win. I can't have anything I want. They say I'm just too young, but it's not my fault! I'll find my own way home if I gotta. I'll make it all alone if I've gotta." Mack looked at her fingerings on her guitar. Her back was to those who were gathering to watch her. Tommy had been the first to watch her. His hands were in his pockets as the girl's anger flared.

"I'm not so trustful with my friends. I'm on the road alone again. I guess I'm tired of giving in. I'm sick of wishing you were near. You've gone your way, you've made it clear. Why do I feel you everywhere? Why do I feel this everywhere? I can't have anything I want. They say I'm just too young, but it's not my fault! I'll find my own way home if I gotta. I'll make it all alone if I've gotta." Now she turned around to face them and her guitar playing became slower at the sight of Tommy.

"Don't wanna spend my time, watching the world go by. I think I'd rather die. And I don't got a plan, don't wanna justify, to stay where I stand, something I won't deny. I can't have anything I want. They say I'm too young, but it's not my fault! I'll find my own way home if I gotta. I'll make it all alone if I've gotta. I can't have anything I want. They say I'm too young, but it's not my fault! I'll find my own way home if I gotta, I'll make it all alone..." She dropped it down a notch and felt tears falling from her eyes, why was she crying so much?!

"24 hours. 24 hours. 24 hours. 24 hours. 24 hours." Mack finished with one final chord and then slumped onto a nearby chair. Everyone clapped and then walked off, with worried glances her way. Tommy stood in the same spot for a moment or two before collapsing next to her. She sighed and wiped at the tears on her eyes, before looking at him dead on- "My dad's leaving." She whispered. It was only a whisper, yet it rang out like a bell in silence.

"Oh..Mack, I'm so-"

"Don't say it. I don't want pity. I'm glad he's leaving. I'm upset he's taking everytihng with him." She shoved the pity aside and set the guitar on the floor next to them, leaning against the sofa. Mack ran her fingers through her hair and looked at Tommy again; "Did you happen to record that? I don't remember any of it, and it's just a spur of the moment song."

"Yeah..I got it." He told her. She nodded and without a word walked over to the bed, and layed down to go to sleep. Within two minutes, she was asleep.

[Mackenzie Holden]

"Ok, I learnt this from experience. Don't pick her up. Shake her and say, 'hey you get up..'" Tommy was teling someone. Mack rolled over and smacked her producer right in the middle of his forehead. He stumbled back, holding his head but grinned wickedly anyway.

"Stop being like that..." She mumbled as she sat up. E.J. stood in front of her, with a look of mock horor on her face. Mack fell back down onto the bed and pulled the pillow over her head. She didn't want to hear about how her appearance is important. She felt someone grab her shoulders and pull her out of the bed, she was soon standing up right with George behind her- the big meaty guy who was supposed to be her body guard.

"Come Mack." E.J. grabbed her hand and pulled her into the dressing room. She was then locked in there, with all the clothes. Mack sighed- pulled out a pear of torn jeans, a ramones t-shirt, and a pair of black converses. After she had gotten dressed she washed her make-up off, reapplied new set, and then pulled a brush through her red hair. When she emerged from the dressing room ten minutes later, Tommy turned around and smiled. He was in a good mood.

"Alright, to the booth!" He exclaimed with joy as he walked over to her. Mack rolled her eyes and crossed her arms as if she wasn't going to move. But she did. Inside the booth she put her headphones on, still wondering what they were going to be recording. It was an old song. "PickUp the Pieces" Mack sighed as she realised it was from Boyz Attack.

"Tommy don't try to relive your glory days through me." She snapped at him through the mic. Tommy smiled and shook his head before pushing down the button and saying:

"I'm not. I think you can really sing this song. Besides, it should get you in a semi better mood." Mack sighed and nodded. They replayed the music and she began to sing:

"I was adrift on an ocean all alone. You came and rescued me when I was far from home. A rush of love around my heart. Just as I fell apart. Nobody ever cared as much for me. Nobody's ever touched my heart and healed my pain. You picked up the pieces, and put me back together again." Mack smiled at Tommy. He was right. It was making her feel better.

"Careful we're fragile, and easily we break.In your arms I'm certain, it's all the love we'lll make. A rush of love around my heart, just as you take my hand. Nobody ever cared as much for me. Nobody's ever touched my heart and healed my pain. You picked up the pieces, and put me back together again. I'll write your name in the stars across the sky. We'll drift away into each other's eyes. Yeah."

"Nobody ever cared as much for me. Nobody's ever touched my heart and healed my pain. You picked up the pieces and put me back together again." Mack finished with a long note and then closed her eyes. Suddenly all the sadness returned, and she was certain Tommy could see that. She took the headphones off and left the booth. There were sandwhiches on the counter, and she took one to eat on the sofa.

[Mackenzie Holden]

She was sitting on the couch, upside down, with her head touching the floor and her feet touching the wall. Beside her head was a bottle of water and near her hands so she could reach it, was her guitar. She was being forced to write another song- but she didn't necessarily want to. Her birthday was in three days. Three. And she didn't know what was going to happen with her party. Maybe the company could throw it for her? Mack shook her head at that idea, that was absurd. She was sure they would do it, but they had mentioned they wanted to do that for her Sweet Sixteen. Mack sighed and rolled backward so she was sitting up right. Her hands subconsciously went to her hair and were straightening it when Tommy entered.

Mack flopped backward so she was lying on her back, and Tommy sat down next to her, his legs outstretched. There was a long silence for the longest of time before he finally spoke to her. And when he did speak, Mack didn't like what was coming out. He seemed worried, and a little bit angered and Mack knew why now: "Your dad is making a law suit, saying this deal isn't yours rightfully. It's his and that he wants you to stop recording immediately." Mack sat up and almost hit her head on the table she was lying underneath. She rubbed her forehead and looked at Tommy with disbelieving eyes. Never in a million years had she thought her father would stoop to such a low of a level. Mack pulled her legs up to her chin and buried her face.

"Of course, I had the security escort him out of the building and have no reason to stop recording. But, Mack," He made her look at him; "If this does go to court- it's going to be put temporarily on hold until this all clears, you understand that right?" Mack nodded slowly and lowered her head again. She let out a rattly breath and looked back up at Tommy.

"Thanks." She whispered as she threw her arms around his neck and hugged him. He sat there for a moment, still as stone, but embraced her back. This girl was...remarkable. She didn't shut down until the last straw- and when someone did something for her she thanked them and always ended up repaying them. Tommy breathed in,Pretty nice for a Slytherin.. he thought. Though he knew there was a darker side if there was a nicer one. Mack was surprising, she did things like no other person he knew- and it was amazing how sweet she could be to someone lower than dirt. He didn't count as lower than dirt though, being a respectable pureblood he was someone she would respect. Her respect, however, was shown differently than many others.

Mack pulled away and smiled a teary smile; "No. Really. Thanks. My dad's been causing loads of trouble around the house, and I didn't think he would hit this low below the belt. It's unusual, even for him, to come at me personally. I'm sorry he was a disturbance at the studio. He is such an arse." Mack pulled her knees up to her chin again and looked at Tommy, her arms hugging her legs. Her life was so messed up, she didn't know what to do about it. The only stability in her life is Jack and the record deal, and Derreck had even started to take one of those away from her. Mack closed her eyes, she was determined to make sure Jack would be there.

[Mackenzie Holden]

Mack heaved a heavy box into the back of Tommy's truck. She almost dropped it, and was quite glad when she hadn't- it would have crushed her foot. She sighed and ran her fingers through her hair as Dix followed suit and put a box next to the one Mack had just set down, "How many things do you own, Dix?" Mack asked with a roll of her eyes. Dixie smirked and went to hop into the front seat. She had something for Tommy, and Mack wasn't stupid- she knew it. Pam came out, wearing jeans and a shirt with tennis shoes. Mack's mouth dropped, never had she seen her mother in such a muggle attire. Mack sighed in disbelief and leaned against the truck as Tommy put the tailgate up.

"You and Georgia don't have to do this, Tommy." Mack told him as she walked up to him. They had offered them a place to stay. The Studio. Not that Mack was complaining, she just didn't want charity. Mack tilted her head and looked up at Tommy who shook his head. His brown eyes sparkled behind his sunglasses.

"We want to. You're family, Mack." He smiled at her, and she smiled back before hopping over the tailgate and nestling into a cushioned spot by a bunch of boxes. Tommy laughed and headed to the drivers seat, turned the engine over, and they were off. Mack watched the Holden Manor vanish from sight as she realised she wasn't Derreck's daughter anymore. She had loads more freedom now that she wasn't on a chain with the leash in his hand. Mack smiled at herself for what seemed like years and leaned her head back against a box.

They were semi-settled in when Tommy pulled Mack aside and handed her a packet. Mack looked at him with a raised eyebrow, but opened the packet and pulled out sheets of music and lyrics. "Another one? Tommy, can't we take a break?" She asked in a whine that would satisfy Dixie. Tommy pulled something out of his back pocket and handed it to Mack, who read it slowly.

"Tour?" She squealed and hugged Tommy, squealing even more. Tour! Mack was going on tour! She sighed and pulled away, "Alright...let's go. We have music to make!" Mack ran into the booth and situated everything. For once all week, she felt complete. Mack put her headphones on and nodded to Tommy. He played the pre-recorded music to Criminal and she began to sing:

"I won't deny, I faked it. Don't wanna lie, I'm jaded.I wanna scream, when inside I'm breaking down. I've left the stone I was under. I'm running home, you won't find her. She walks alone, all through this broken town. Going the wrong way down a one way street, where the feeling is criminal. No one helps me out when I believe. Just look, look, looking for someone like me. Where the feeling is mutual. Can anybody see what I see? Cos I don't see me."

"I blow away the ashes, I clear his face, to look at it.He stole my name, while I waited lost and found. I found a place where I'll keep you, cos I won't live through you or beneath you. I walk this way where these winds won't bring me down. Goin' the wrong way down a one way street, where the feeling is criminal. Nobody helps me out when I believe. Just look, look, looking for someone like me. Where the feeling is mutual. Can anybody see what I see? Cos I don't see me."

Mack held the headphones closer to her ear and she felt the music pulse through her, it was apart of her. And she was aching with so much notes and melodies that she wasn't sure if she could actually finish the song, but she continued: "Don't let me be. Stayin' at all. Don't waste it on me. Cos if i take a chance. And if I hurt again. And if I let you. You could be my reckonin'. I'm going the wrong way down a one way street, where the feeling is criminal. Nobody helps me out when I believe. Just look, look, looking for someone like me. Where the feeling is mutual. Can anybody see what I see? Cos I don't see me."

The song was finished and she was hungry. Mack took off the headphones, and headed toward the mini-kitchen where a bowl of vegetable soup was waiting for her. She looked up as her mother appproached her, a letter in hand. Mack took it and opened it, and the first sentence she knew who it was from. Jack. Mack shoved past her mother and locked herself in her dressing room, reading the letter over and over again. Then she realised she would have to reply.

[Mackenzie Holden]

"You said you didn't need me, but you did. You said didn't want me, but you do. It's kind of like a comedy, first you kiss me and then say we're through. I say you've got some issues, yeah you do. Some things you got to work through, you really do. It's sort of like a talk show, no wait a freak show, when the freak is you." When you feel like you've accomplished something, it's the greatest feeling in the world. Too bad I haven't reached that feeling yet. Day by day, it gets easier to do. The late nights and early mornings. The hours after hours in the studio. It finally all pays off when you wrap up your record. Or so Tommy says. I can't wait until we wrap up the record. I want to feel that feeling of accomplishment, that feeling I have never felt. Mack licked her lips in between verses and continued on:

"I'm the smoke from your fire, I'm that guy you can trust. I'm the chord on your guitar, I'm that girl you can't shut up. I'm the blood you might need, in your car when you speed. In that cigarette you breathe, you can't get rid of me. You said I wasn't funny, when you laughed. You said I couldn't drive fast, then you crashed. It's funny how it works out, with your big mouth, you'll always get it back." I feel a small amount of accomplishment when I finish a song, but it's only a small one. One that doesn't really count. I feel happy that the song has been finished, but it doesn't hold over as long as Mack would like it to. Her hands moved to the headset that was covering her ears and placed it on the right side.

"You thought you had me worked out, you're not deep. Mr. I Screw About, you're still a creep. At best you could've confessed, that you're a big mess, and that you're so damn weak. I'm the smoke from your fire, I'm that guy you can trust. I'm the chord on your guitar, I'm that girl you can't shut up. I'm the blood you might need, in your car when you speed. In that cigarette you breathe, you can't get rid of me. And I still try and justify, try and let this die, you'll never say goodbye. I can't quite rub it in your face, just in three more days and I'll send you home to cry." Then it was the vocals they had recorded earlier. Mack looked at Tommy through the glass, he was mixing in the vocals.

"I'm the blood you might need, in your car when you speed. In that cigarette you breathe, you can't get rid of me!" Mack finished her last part, and then listened to the vocals the music as it continued and faded out. She then slipped the headset off her head and placed it on the mic before opening the door to the box and stepping out. Tommy swiveled around on his chair to look at her and smiled, "Good! Great! 30 minute lunch then back in here for another song." He said the last part to everyone and there was a mad shuffle for the door to the main lounge. Mack chuckled and crossed her arms, looking down at Tommy. He stared up at her, "What?" Mack shook her head-

"Nothing."

[Mackenzie Holden]

"If I was drowning in the sea, would you dive right in and save me? If I was falling like a star, would you be right there and catch me? If I was dreaming of your kiss, would you look right through me? On the street I'm waiting. And in my heart it's raining." Sometimes, you can't hold in your feelings, so you express them through actions. Sometimes you don't know how to speak them...or show your emotions...so you do it through something else. A song maybe? Or acting? Sometimes we hold our feelings in enough that they threaten to burst if possible...I tend to do that. I know I do. And sometimes they are too strong to not do something about them..

"Your eyes are holding up the sky. Your eyes make me weak, I don't know why. Your eyes make me scared to tell the truth. I thought my heart was bullet-proof, but now I'm dancing on the roof. And everybody knows I'm into you..." Mack watched her manager, Darius, walk in. He looked serious, he looked as if there was bad news. He leaned over and whispered something to Tommy, whose cheery disposition immediately dissapeared into a melancholy state. Mack didn't miss a beat, she continued to sing. Her eyes never leaving the scene before her, "If my heart was sadder than a song, would you still listen?If my tears fell on you, one by one, would you see them glisten?" Tommy turned from his conversation with Darius to look at Mack.

And sometimes, other emotions push away those first emotions. And for a moment..you forget the first emotions even exist at all.. "On the street I'm waiting, and in my heart its raining. Your eyes are holding up the sky. Your eyes make me weak, I don't know why. Your eyes make me scared to tell the truth. I thought my heart was bullet-proof, but now I'm dancing on the roof. And everybody knows I'm into you. Every single thing you say, makes me want to run away. Sometimes loves a rainy day, but life goes on." Mack's eyes closed, blocking out Tommy's sad face from her eyesight. She didn't want to see that. Tommy being upset, was something never good. Especially if Darius was just talking to him.

"Your eyes are holding up the sky. Your eyes make me weak, I don't know why. Your eyes make me scared to tell the truth. I thought my heart was bullet-proof, but now I'm dancing on the roof. And everybody knows I'm into you..." Mack finished the song and listened as the music faded out. She slowly opened her blue eyes and looked at Tommy who now had his head in his hands and his elbows on the table in front of him. Quest, the guy who did all the mixing looked at Tommy and shook his head almost apologetically. As the music finally faded out, Mack lowered her head phones and spoke into the microphone, "What's wrong?" Quest looked up, and shook his head again, "Tommy, what's wrong?!"

[Mackenzie Holden]

"Quest, I need that copy of Katya Livingston's newest album asap." Tommy said into his phone. He looked around his office at G Major Records. It was nicely furnished, a red couch sat against one wall with a glass table in front of it. His desk was also made of glass, and his chair was a red leather grand arm chair. He had a Mac computer, and three bookshelves full of CDs. After going on tour with Mackenzie Holden for the summer, he had been away from his office for a long while. And now he had been back for a semester, and it didn't feel the same without that fiery red head around. She was the life of G Major, which would explain why it was so dead now. Tommy hadn't the foggiest idea where she had gone to, how she was or who she was living with or even if she continued her singing career. He missed her, but he never had the time to track her down and contact her.

"Um, bossman?" Quest's voice crackled through the speaker. Tommy clicked the button with curiousity; "What have I said about calling me bossman?" Quest chuckled that low humble chuckle of his before saying; "Oh, you'll be begging me to call you bossman once you hear this... there's a blonde girl out here saying she would like a meeting with you. She says she has some interesting ideas to pitch to you." Tommy rolled his eyes. How many wanna-be Instant Stars would he have to shoo off before they got the hint? Ever since Mack's album did so well, every girl in the nation wanted to have him as a producer. But he didn't just want any singer. He wanted her. The next Mack. But Mack could never be replaced.

"Tell her she needs an appointment." He said simply to Quest. Quest chuckled again; "No can do, bossman. I don't think you want to turn this one down." "Look, Quest, I don't care how hott this girl is - send her away!" "Too late, bossman, she's on her way to see you. Feisty little thing!" Tommy slammed the button and then stood from his chair to lock his office door and call security. Too late. His door opened and in stepped a blonde with an electric guitar. A rather nice electric guitar. She held up her hand to stop him from speaking, and closed the door behind her. Her fingers started playing the guitar, and Tommy sat down - might as well listen. She wore sunglasses, and a school uniform of some sort. But he couldn't tell which school, because there was no crest.

"If I don't cry, do you think I don't feel? If I look away, doesn't mean I do not see. And just because I want, someone when I'm alone, doesn't mean I'm helpless, that I can't stand on my own. How far can we go before we break? How long can I wait? How strong do you think I am? How much can I take of this? Am I a rock, or a rose, or a fist? Or the breath at the end of a kiss? How deep do you wanna go? 'Cause I'll go there if I can, you make it harder than it has to be. How strong do you think I am?" Her voice sounded so familiar, yet Tommy couldn't place it. She almost reminded him of Mack, aside from the hair. He didn't interrupt her, so she continued.

"It's so hard to tell, what's in your heart. What you keep to yourself, is tearing me apart. Should I be afraid, to dream about you? If you feel the same, what you gonna do? How strong do you think I am? How much can I take of this? Am I a rock, or a rose, or a fist? Or the breath at the end of a kiss? How deep do you wanna go? 'Cause I'll go there if I can, you make it harder than it has to be. How strong do you think I am?" The music stopped suddenly, and she set the guitar down, before lifting her sunglasses off her eyes and perching them on her head. Tommy's eyes grew wide and his jaw dropped, "Yeah, well, it's a work in progress Little Tommy Q."

"Mack..." He whispered before standing and hugging her so hard she was sure her ribs were crushed. She smiled and hugged him back, she hadn't realized the reunion would be like this.