What To Say?

[Alexander Promise R7]

He was late. Alex pulled out his cell phone from his coat pocket and checked the time. He was really late. Why tonight? Why did the weather have to go fowl tonight? Wind. That was the worst part of living in the Outer Hebrides. The wind was always a pain. What do you mean the ferry’s delayed? “Sorry kid, the wind’s strong this eve. Not safe to go out on the water” How long? “An hour…maybe two?” Luckily it had only been an hour and a half. But it was an hour and a half later then he had needed to arrive. He had missed her show by now. That would be inevitable. He had been waiting for so long to see her and he missed her concert. What would she think of him? ‘Oh that dumb boy missed my show, no point in wasting my time on him’. That’s what she would think. She would think he had simply chosen not to go, which was definitely not the case. He had been waiting all summer to go to this concert. Hopefully he would be able to catch her backstage and explain himself. Hopefully she’d believe him. Hopefully she wouldn’t hate him.

Alex hurried down the busy street, tugging Bach along beside him. The dog was so happy to be around all the people he frequently stopped and sniffed someone. At this point Alex had stopped yelling and just started pulling. At least Bach was still a puppy, Alex couldn’t imagine what this adventure would be like if the dog was any bigger. “You cant bring it.” What do you mean I can’t bring him? “He’s a dog.” Well he has a ticket, so you better let him on this ferry or I swear… Alex had discovered he had hidden persuasion skills tonight. Times of struggle and a frantic mood will bring you to be very persuasive. Having a big dog does help. A big dog that couldn’t keep his nose to himself, but a big dog none-the-less.

There was nothing that could stop Alex from seeing her tonight. He had missed her so impossibly much. Impossibly; that was the best way to describe how badly he’d missed her. It was impossible that someone could miss someone they had only just met, this bad. But Alex did. He missed her more then he’d ever missed someone before. She was all he thought about. All he dreamed about, for, he had started dreaming. She seemed to be the only thing he really cared about these days. He had tried explaining his feelings to his sister, and she hadn’t been able to make sense of them. Then again, Alex couldn’t make sense of them himself. He needed to spend time with her. He needed Mackenzie. He needed to talk to her, to see her, maybe even to hold her hand again. Oh that was definitely something he missed. The second she had left that train compartment Alex found himself lonelier then he had ever been in his life. Alex didn’t get lonely; he was self-sufficient. He could stay in his room for days…well…as long as he was fed. But what I mean is he had never really needed anyone before. He was content being alone, and had never had issues with it – too much time with a twin you could say. But for one reason or another he was lonely without her. He needed her.

He was almost there now. The concert was definitely over now. He was just praying she would still be back stage. Praying they hadn’t packed up yet. The weather wasn’t too bad, it looked like rain, but it always looked like rain in Scotland. She wouldn’t be gone yet would she? He reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone again. Why had he not gotten her number? Oh yeah, he was on a train back from his magical school, where muggle electronics don’t work, and he was meeting a girl from this magical school that he had no idea interacted with muggles on a regular basis. That was why. What would he say to her when he saw her? He had no idea. He hadn’t thought about that. All his thoughts from the time she left his seat on the train, to this very second his mind had only been on getting to her again. Not what he would say when he actually did get to her. So what would he say? I mean…would he say hi? Just hi? Was that good enough? He had no idea, none what so ever. He didn’t even know if he was going to see her. For all he knew she could be packed up and long gone by the time he got there. There were so many things he’d like to say though. All the things he’d been thinking he’d love to tell her. He’d like to tell her he loved her, if only he knew for sure if he loved her or not… He was doing it again. He was narrating.

No matter. He was there. There he was. He there was. There was he. Was he there? Yes, yes he was there. He was standing right outside the address on the ticket. Just to be sure he reached into his coat and retrieved the ticket from the inside pocket. Yes, this was the place. There weren’t any people. Where was he supposed to go now? Oh if only he had her phone number. Bach sat down next to him and looked up, whining. Alex frowned and nodded. “Yes Bach…we’re screwed.”

[Mackenzie Holden]

The moment they had arrived in Scotland, Mack’s stomach had started to knot. Not that it hadn’t been knotting before… it was just that this time it was because she knew she’d be seeing Alex all in good time. All in good time. That was what she kept telling herself. Little sayings like that, though, weren’t enough to tie her over. All in good time; patience is a virtue. Mack really didn’t care what patience was, because she didn’t have any at that particular moment. Not that she ever really had any. Mackenzie Holden has never been known for patience. Mack had been to Scotland twice before. Once on tour, and once one a business trip with her father to a race. This time was different than both of those times because this time Scotland held Alex. Sure, the times before it must’ve held him, too, but Mack didn’t know him then. She knew him now. He was all she thought about. He was all she sang about. Every song with any hint of love, she sang to him. Every dream she had, was about him. There were more of them now-a-days, too. Mack usually had terrifying dreams. Dreams about Derreck coming back and taking everything. But now, every single one of her dreams were good ones – and they all centered around Alex. It was crazy to think that he had become someone she constantly thought about over one conversation that they had on the train.

No matter if it was crazy or not, it was true. This was happening to Mack. She was helplessly falling for a guy she had met, literally, once and for only a few hours. She couldn’t stop it, and she didn’t want to. Who would? It was a feeling so great that she was certain it was addictive. Mack had never experienced a feeling like this and it was strong and she didn’t want it to stop. Even though sometimes… “Mack?” … it wasn’t so great to get caught up in the feelings you are developing… especially when you’re on stage in front of thousands. “Are you okay?” Kyle was a heart beat away from jumping from behind his drum set, Chuck was holding his bass and staring at her like she was a freak, and Matt was calling her name as he moved toward her. Mack finally broke from her trance, realizing what was going on, and looked at her band. They all stared at her as her eyes wandered over each of them and then moved to the stage wings where Tommy and Nelson stood. Nelson was trying to look like he wasn’t surprised, like she couldn’t shock him anymore – but she knew she had. She had never frozen on stage before. She had never been so distracted from her work. Mack looked back over the crowd. They were all quiet, watching her, waiting for her to do something.

So, Mack did something. Mack pulled her guitar strap up and over her head and held the guitar out to Matt as she walked past him off the stage. Matt took it, clearly as confused as everyone else, and followed her with his eyes as she disappeared into the left wing. Instantly Mack was bombarded with hissing questions from Tommy and Nelson. What was she doing? Where was she going? What could she possibly be thinking? All Mack could do was stare straight ahead and walk past them. They followed her all the way to the dressing room she had been assigned, trailing questions after her. Mack didn’t bother to even look at them until they had closed the door behind them and blocked her only way out. She breathed in deeply and turned around. They were both looking at her with those stares and it took all her strength not to squirm. She hated when people stared at her that way. There was only one way to get them to stop doing that, “I quit. I quit it all. I can’t do it. I’m sorry.” They didn’t say anything. Nelson looked like he was about to faint, Tommy looked livid, but there wasn’t anything she could do about it. This was what she was doing. This was what she wanted and they couldn’t change it.

Matt, Chuck, and Kyle burst into the dressing room. They were all quiet. They all stared at her. Then Mack shrugged and shook her head, “I’m sorry.” It was all she could say, all she could do. With an apologetic look in Tommy’s direction, Mack grabbed her purse, and pushed through her old band, producer, and manager. She needed to get away. The only thing that she could think while walking out was, that if Alex was in the crowd, he saw her walk off. The only other thing she could think was that he’d go back stage after the concert and expect to find her and she wouldn’t be there. What was she to do? She couldn’t wait there for him. She couldn’t sit in that room and wait for him when they were all staring at her that way. No, she had to get out. She had to leave. Mack felt terrible for leaving him the way she was even though he wasn’t even there, but she had no choice. Right? Mack’s stomach churned as she made her way out the exit that led into the back alley, deciding it’d be safer than going through the main lobby. She had no idea where she was going to go, what she was going to do, but she knew that anywhere but in that place was the best place for her to be. It just had to be. Right?

Mack ran her fingers through her hair and crossed her arms as she left the alley and headed out onto the main street. She should’ve brought her jacket. She hadn’t been thinking about the weather, though, so why would she have brought her jacket? She hadn’t been thinking at all, really. Mack sighed and started the walk past the main entrance when she looked up and saw him. He was there. Right there. What were the possibilities that Alexander Promise would be standing outside right when she was going to pass the building? Mack tried to control the smile that was crossing her face but she found it nearly impossible. Just the sight of him made her head spin and her heart pound. It was great. She knew she was getting all girly, all mushy, all lovey, something that she never did – but this feeling was something that Mack had no control over. None whatsoever. And she loved that. She breathed in a moment, calming herself, before making her way over toward him. She stopped in front of him and just looked at him a moment, her smile a small but definitely happy smile, “Hi.”

[Alexander Promise R7]

There it was again. There was that sudden flash image of him grabbing her and pulling her close, pressing his lips to hers and holding her tight as they kissed. It was the first thought that came when saw her. He wanted to kiss her so bad, but he couldn’t move at all. He just stood there, a grin slowly forming on his face as he looked at her. He wanted to hug her or do something but by the time his mind had worked out that this wasn’t just another day dream, that he was literally standing a short distance from the girl he had been thinking about all summer, he still couldn’t move. His mind just went ballistic. His mouth was dry, which was odd, that had never happened before. Alex couldn’t understand how this girl had such an effect on his nerves, no one made Alex nervous. It was a good kind of nervous though, like that good kind of rush you get right after a roller coaster. It’s scary, but so fun at the same time. Finally when his mouth seemed to be moving again he tried to say something. Oh he must have looked like a total idiot right now. The first time she’d seen him since the train and he was just standing there stuttering. At last, words came out of his mouth. “Mackenzie…I…I’ve missed you.” It was the first thing he wanted to tell her. “I mean…you’re just…you’re…hello.” He managed finally.

Hello? That was the best thing he could muster as a second sentence? He’d have to make up for that. He had no idea how but he would make up for that. He closed his eyes for a moment and laughed lightly, calming himself down before opening his eyes and smiling softly at her. “You look really lovely, Mack.” There, that was what he had wanted to say. She did. Alex had a sneaky suspicion though that she would always look lovely to him. How could she not? She was beautiful, the most beautiful girl Alex had ever laid eyes on…and he’d laid eyes on his share of girls. But Mackenzie Holden was different. There was something different about her, a spark, something that made her stand out from all the other girls. Something that made her perfect for him. The street was still loud and people were still bustling past the two of them, but Alex hardly noticed. There was that smile and those eyes he had dreamt about. He had missed being trapped in them. Now he was again. He was lost in the moment, all wrapped up in how amazing it was to see her again. What a coincidence, walking into her…well…having her walk into him right in front of the building she was supposed to be in. Wait…she was supposed to be in side. Alex suddenly wondered what had happened that she’d be out in a street she didn’t know by herself and was impossibly happy she had run into him.

He could move again. He could move. He shifted slightly and looked at her more closely, titling his head to the side just a bit. “What…why are you outside all alone?” That worried him. He wondered if she often walked down the street by herself. He wouldn’t like her to do that, what if she got hurt? Well at least this time he was here and he could make sure nothing happened to her. A breeze blew past the two of them that almost made Alex shiver. He looked at Mack again to realize she didn’t have a coat. Goodness was she unprepared or what? “And out in the weather like this? There’s a storm coming…well…it’s Scotland of course there’s a storm.” He laughed lightly again and reached into his pocket, retrieving his phone. He transferred it into the pocket of his sweater and then took his coat off. This proved to be slightly difficult because it require a shifting of holding Bach’s leash. He had to transfer hands a few times with the thing, which made him remember that the dog was even there at all. Bach hadn’t made a peep since Mack had showed up, and even if he had, Alex hadn’t noticed. That was strange. Bach loved people and normally someone walking up and talking to Alex wouldn’t be license for Bach to nearly attack them in playful, loving, puppy energy. But not this time. It was almost as if Bach knew how important this meeting was to Alex. The puppy just sat there, looking up hopefully at Mack.

“He probably wants you to scratch his ears.” Alex nodded thoughtfully as he moved slightly behind Mack, holding his jacket out to put it on her. “But here, take this first, it’s not good weather to not have a coat on. And we should probably get inside somewhere before it starts to rain or something.” He smiled softly at her, hoping she’d take his coat. Maybe then he could hug her, or kiss her or something like that. However, at the moment giving her his coat was all he could do. A protective quality had kicked in, and the thought of her being cold was not a thought he fancied. “I mean…that is if you don’t mind dogs. He’s impossibly friendly I swear.”

[Mackenzie Holden]

Mack nervously rubbed her bare arms and looked down at her feet. She had thought about this. About seeing him again and yet her imaginings were nothing like this. When she heard him speak, she looked back up again, smiling. “You’ve missed me?” She bit her lip happily, looking down again, He stammered next. It would appear he didn’t know how to say what he was thinking. When he finally came out with a hello, Mack looked up, “I’ve missed you, too, Alex.” The words were so simple to say and yet she knew that if asked about them… she wouldn’t be able to explain them. She had tried to explain how she felt. She had tried to write it into song, and while the song was good, it didn’t do her emotions any justice. Which was a first. Mack’s songs always reflected her emotions and thoughts perfectly. The thought that Alex made her feel something she couldn’t put into words or music scared her, but she liked it. The point is; it was easy to tell him she missed him. Easy to say that she missed him because it was the truth. She could go on. She could go on to say that he was all she thought about, all she dreamt about, all she talked about, yes she could go on to say all that. But at this point, Mack wasn’t sure how that would play over. Besides, he had said he missed her and that was something. Yes, that was definitely something.

He closed his eyes a moment and all Mack could do was smile at him. He seemed nervous or maybe repulsed. But, no, he couldn’t be repulsed because of he said next, right? She looked lovely. Mack shrugged, smiling still, “Thanks, though if I weren’t wearing this make up… you probably would say differently. I look scary without make up on when I’m on tour. It’s from the countless sleepless nights I get on the bus.” Mack smiled slightly, looking down at her feet again and then looking over slightly. Paws? She looked up just slightly to see a rather big, but undeniably cute, looking dog. Mack didn’t know how she was with dogs. She had never been around one, not ever. Trevor had cats, but that was it. She was never allowed a puppy so she was never given the luxury of finding out how she would react to one. But she smiled before looking back up at Alex. It was a cute puppy. A big one, yes, but cute. She tucked her hair behind her ear before shivering slightly and crossing her arms tighter, trying to lock in the warmth. If only she had brought her stupid jacket, but of course she hadn’t. She had nothing but the idea of getting out of the concert hall and away from everybody on her mind.

When he asked what she was doing out alone, Mack closed her eyes and frowned before turning and looking over her shoulder at the building, “Yeah. Hmm…” Mack ran her fingers through her hair and turned back to look at him, “It’s a long story. Maybe we could go somewhere and talk about it?” Was it really a long story? I quit. I walked off. The end. Nope, not that long, but Mack could drag it out. She was good at that. Why she wanted to actually talk about it instead of just brush over it confused her, but she wasn’t going to fight it. There were a lot of new things happening to Mack right now, and she wasn’t going to run from them. She shivered again, looking down at her feet once more. She hated being cold. Alex mentioned a storm and Mack chuckled at his Scotland remark before looking up to the sky. “I kind of ran out before I could grab a jacket,” she explained weakly as she closed her eyes and straightened her head again so she was able to see him when she opened them. He was taking off his coat now, Mack couldn’t help but smile. Alex was just… Mack tucked her hair behind her ear again. It was hard to explain what he was. She had tried to explain him to Kyle, but it had been difficult. She couldn’t even find the words. She doubted she’d even be able to find them now.

She looked at the puppy when Alex mentioned it as he moved behind her. She happily accepted the jacket, sliding her arms into the sleeves and smiling at him over her shoulder as she pulled her hair out from beneath the collar. “I… don’t know if I mind dogs or not.” Mack smiled at Alex a moment and then knelt down in front of the puppy, reaching her hand out and scratching him behind the ear. She laughed lightly at how happy he seemed and then took her hand back, standing again. Without much thought, Mack looped her arm through Alex’s, “So, where should we go? I’ve been here twice before now and both of those times I was either confined to a bus or shackled to my father’s wrist.” She smirked at him. In actuality, Mack couldn’t care less where they went as long as she was with Alex and as long as she could forget she even had quit the tour. There was a pressing matter in the back of her head, but she wasn’t going to think about that now. She couldn’t think about that now, because she simply didn’t want to think about that now. She would think about it later. Much later.

[Alexander Promise R7]

She missed him. That was a start. What if she hadn’t? Lord, what was with Alex and what ifs. It was all he ever thought these days. What if she ignored him. What if she told him to go away. What if she had a boyfriend. What if…she had a boyfriend? No…no that couldn’t be. Alex shoved that thought from his mind immediately. But really, what if she hadn’t missed him? Typically when someone says ‘I missed you’ it is polite to say ‘I missed you too’. Was she just being polite? Alex honestly didn’t want to consider it. It was foolish to upset himself over something like that. She had missed him. That was that. She said she missed him and she had. Why would she say something that wasn’t true? She wouldn’t. Nope. She wouldn’t. Alex had missed her so much. The simple fact that maybe she had missed him one third as much as he missed her, would be good enough for him. He couldn’t work out why he cared so much. It was more then just wanting her to miss him, he wanted her to care about him. He wanted to be a thought in her mind. He wanted to be something that meant something to her. He wanted a place in her life. He had no idea why, but he did. He honestly didn’t care why, he just did.

“That’s silly you know.” He said, at this point fumbling with his coat, the dog leash, and his phone. “I’m positive you look beautiful with or without make up. A girl like you? Need sleep? Please.” He laughed lightly and grinned up at her. That had been the first thought he’d had when he saw her lying there in that compartment. Well, it had been the second one to be honest; the first thought had been about how intimidating she had been at first. Then he thought about how beautiful she was. Everything about her was wonderful. She had…almost a glow to her that made her stand out from everyone else on the street. Alex couldn’t take his eyes off her. Maybe it was more then just how beautiful she was, because, sure she was gorgeous, but so many other things added into that. She was clever, funny, nice, smart. Alex had talked to her once. Only once and he felt like…like he knew her. Like he had known her for years. He felt like he knew everything about her. A long story? Alex watched her look back at the building behind her and he had a feeling something had gone wrong with the show. What exactly he had absolutely no clue. But something. Could they go somewhere to talk about it? They most definitely could. He smiled as he put his jacket on her, and watched her pull her hair out from the collar. She looked nice in his jacket, unbelievably nice in his jacket. He had a feeling he wouldn’t be asking for it back. Wow he had a lot of feelings. I digress; he wasn’t going to want that jacket back. No, he wanted her to keep it. He knew that the second he saw it on her. It was something of his she could keep. That way she would think of him. Even if she hadn’t done it before, now she could think of him. Every time she saw the jacket, even if she never wore it again, she would have it. She’d have something of his. She’d have a bit of him.

Alex grinned, putting his hands in his pockets as Mack kneeled down to bet Bach. Bach was definitely pleased by the attention he was receiving, and Alex was surprised he didn’t leap up on her. As soon as she stood however, Bach stood and looked up at her hopefully. Now that he’d gotten her attention, he sure wasn’t happy about losing it. Alex however, was perfectly content, seeing as Mack’s attention had shifted from Bach, back to himself. That was a plus, for Alex at least. He grinned bigger still as she looped her arm through his, and he took it a step further, taking her hand and linking their fingers. It was bold, but he was in a bold mood. Hey, he hadn’t seen her all summer and here she was again. They had done it last time right? They had held hands on the train right? At least this time it was more proper…it was almost…date like. “Well you know, there’s a coffee shop just up around the corner. It’s a nice place, there are big couches and rather comfortable. You like coffee don’t you? Well there’s other things there too if you don’t.” He smiled and started walking in that direction. “Sound alright?” He looked around the street and couldn’t stop smiling. He was walking down a busy street with a beautiful girl and he was walking a dog. It was one of those things that single people look at and mutter about. It’s one of those ‘jealous people’ makers. It was funny to think that, Alex wasn’t even dating Mack. But it felt like it. And to be honest he wanted to. But that would all happen in time. He hoped.

[Mackenzie Holden]

Mack’s smile returned to her face full force when he took her hand and linked their fingers. She had been hoping he would do that. She had liked it so much the first time it had happened and it wasn’t like they had spent the whole train ride holding hands… Sierra had interrupted and then she had gone to be a good Prefect. She listened to him talk about a coffee place not too far and she nodded, “Coffee sounds amazing.” Mack hadn’t had coffee for awhile, but she knew she liked it. Dixie hated coffee, though, and Mack could never completely understand that. It was funny, because Dixie had come back from Paris completely addicted to coffee again. Mack smiled as they started the walk to the coffee place. There was a small silence between them and then Mack couldn’t take it anymore, “I meant it.” She looked straight ahead, smiling softly, purposely not making eye contact with him because she knew she’d lose her nerve. “I missed you, Alex. I was counting down ‘til I was supposed to arrive in Scotland. My band was getting annoyed with me, but…” Mack shrugged slightly, now looking over at him, “… I couldn’t help it. They said it was affecting my mood, therefore making me hard to live with.” She chuckled and looked away again, this time down at her feet. She counted the cracks in the sidewalk for a moment, “I just thought you might want to know.” Mack couldn’t seem to keep her gaze on one thing. Her eyes now lifted back up so she was looking in front of her as she walked.

This was all completely amazing to her. She had thought about this so much. She had closed her eyes and seen his face. She had dreamt about him. She had written songs about him. And now, here she was, walking with him; hand in hand. It was a picture of perfection and Mack couldn’t help but think of what her father’s face would be like, what Dixie’s face would be like, what Trevor’s, Jack’s, Hanks, even her mother’s would be like. It was a satisfying thought. She loved proving people wrong. It was the Slytherin in her. She liked being right and hated being wrong. Of course, coming from a long line of purebloods on both her mother’s and her father’s side meant that there were a lot of people like that in her family. People would do anything to prove her wrong. It was like… 5 points if you prove Dixie wrong, 10 if you prove Pam wrong, and 100 if you prove Mack wrong because they all knew she was the terrible family member. She was the one that disgraced her family name. She was the one who took a muggle career path. She was the one who did a lot of things to tear the Holden/Worthington name down. Not Dixie. No, because no matter how insane Dixie got… she was always perfect. She was the perfect little angel daughter. Mack stopped thinking. She had gotten better at thinking civil thoughts toward her sister. After all, they had been getting along better since she was in that car accident. But sometimes Mack got caught up in how she used to be toward her sister. How could she not? Dixie had been horrid to her for years and years.

“So,” Mack said suddenly, breaking a small silence, “should I start with the obvious?” She smiled over at Alex and then nodded her head in the direction of the puppy, “What’s his name?” She had every intention of finding about as much as she could about Alex Promise and she would if she had her way; and Mack most always had her way. That didn’t mean he couldn’t find out about her, too. In fact, she wanted him to find out her story. Even though it was complicated and dramatic. She wanted him to know who she was. She wanted him to know her history. It was strange how she wanted him to know everything about her. Every little thing. Every quirk, every hobby, every favourite, everything. Was that so incredibly outrageous? Mack didn’t think so. So, she wanted them to know just about everything about each other, and the only way to do that – or so Mack thought was the only way – was to ask questions and Mack was good at that without feeling ashamed that she was asking the question. She’d start off with something simple and obvious and then later, when they were drinking coffee, she’d ask more questions. What his family was like, what he was like, things like that. Questions, at this point, were crucial… as much as Mack hated that.

[Alexander Promise R7]

Alex grinned bigger then he could ever remember grinning when she told him she really had missed him. She had counted down till Scotland? She had really missed hi that much? He looked over at her as she talked, though she didn’t look at him through the first part, when she finally did, he smiled warmly at her. Then she looked down again. Broken from his momentary trance, Alex slid his thumb on hers and nodded happily. “I’ve been counting down too you know? Till today. I really have missed you, and it’s amazingly nice to see you again. You’re all I’ve thought about since that train ride.” Yeah he said it. He’d done the hopeless romantic who says things that normal people would never let escape themselves, but what could it hurt? Alex had assured himself there was nothing to worry about. He liked her a lot. He had decided that. He’d met her, and talked to her once before this night, and he liked her a lot. When you dream about someone, you can pretty much be sure you like them. He smiled over at her once more and then looked ahead of them again, turning the corner now. Alex looked down at Bach, whose tail was wagging happily and whose tongue was hanging out of his mouth.

Alex looked up at her again as she spoke and then followed her gaze down to the happy dog trotting along with them. “Bach.” He said, smiling back over at Mack. “He’s the newest edition to the family. We figured we’d name him Bach…you know like the musician? Because we’ve got a cat named Mozart…then again….the cat actually plays the piano…Bach’s just really cute.” He laughed and gently tugged on her hand, pulling her closer to him as they neared the coffee shop. He was happy they were talking like this. Just like old friends…and yet, like strangers at the same time. It was funny how he could know nothing about her and still feel like he had known her all his life at the same time. It was in the back of his mind that tonight might be the last time he would see her until school started again, and for that reason he planned on getting to know her as best as he could. He worried that she would leave and forget about him, and then when school started things would be different. That was the funny thing about school. Things were always different at school. Being around your peers has a funny way of changing you. Especially at Hogwarts. House loyalties and segregation split the school up in fourths and there was rarely much connection between houses. You stuck with your house. That was the way it was. Then there was the old blood-tie thing. Purebloods, half-bloods, and mudbloods. Alex wondered why things were that way quite often but, what were you supposed to do? That was the way of the world. Sure it was wrong, but that was the way it was. He worried if she would stop talking to him when they got back to school. Slytherins were normally the worst of the group, but then again, not her right? She wouldn’t be that way. Not to Alex. Not to him. No…no nothing would change between them.

They had reached the shop now, and Alex looked inside. There weren’t many people there, it was late. He looked at the door and then down at Bach. Finally he turned to Mack with a smirk on his face. “If anyone asks, he’s a service dog alright?” He pulled open the door and Bach led the three of them inside. No one looked up when they entered; everyone was too caught up in their own business. It was a nice place. The actual place where you bought the coffee was on one side, and the other side was very lounge like. There were comfortable couches and chairs, set up in different arrangements to allow for different sized groups. Alex led them to a spot in the corner, far away from the door and the other customers. He picked the spot half trying to conceal the fact that he had a dog with him and half so that he and Mack would have privacy. To talk at least. There was a small couch, big enough for two or three people and a coffee table conveniently placed in front of it. Alex looked at the spot and then over at Mack. This alright with you? He smiled and let go of Bach’s leash, looking down at the puppy. “Stay.” The dog just looked at him and Alex laughed before pulling Mack over to the counter to get their drinks. “He’ll save our spot.” He assured her, smirking as they stood in front of the counter. “So…what would you like?”

[Mackenzie Holden]

She was all he thought about since that day on the train? Mack smiled softly and looked down again. That made her really happy. She loved that he thought about her because it meant she wasn’t alone in the thinking. That was one fear that Mack hadn’t wanted to prepare for. Honestly, she didn’t want to prepare for any of the fears that came associated with Alex Promise. Mack was experiencing new fears. New fears that engulfed her completely. Fears that were illogical because she shouldn’t even be afraid of the things she was afraid of. Honestly. Her and Alex were friends, right? Just friends. Were they even friends? She figured they were friends. They were talking, they were holding hands… although, granted… just friends don’t technically hold hands, but still. Mack considered Alex a friend, and Alex would be a friend. But was it terribly wrong of her to want him to be more? She was afraid of that. Afraid of wanting to be more with him being wrong. Was it wrong? Mack tried not to sigh, wanting to just shove her fears away but knowing that even if she did that for the moment – they would only come back full force later on that night. Well, at least later on that night she’d be able to mull over it in her mind and not worry about looking terribly unhappy. She wanted to focus all her attention on Alex, every word she said or move she made – all of her attention needed to be on him… and any passing cars. Those things just came out of nowhere these days!

Alex answered her question and Mack grinned, “Bach and Mozart? Gee, you sure do like your composers; tell me… any fish named Beethoven?” He tugged on her hand and pulled her closer to him and Mack couldn’t control the smile on her face. This is silly, Mackenzie, don’t get caught up in this guy. What would your father say? Oh, who bloody cared what her father would say? Derreck Holden’s opinion had never been important to Mack. He never had a huge influence in her decisions, ever. But…. Mack couldn’t help but think about her Slytherin heritage. Derreck would frown upon her feelings for a Ravenclaw; she knew this already. Not only because Derreck was predictable, but because… well… she had done it before. Sadly. Mack pushed away another sigh, not wanting to dwell on her past. She hated her past. She hated dwelling on her past. She hated it all. That was one thing that Mack wasn’t looking forward to telling Alex anything about her past. But a relationship didn’t have any secrets. Wait. What relationship? There was no relationship. There was a friendship, which had secrets. Mack had plenty of friends at G-Major who knew absolutely nothing about her past. But the thing with them was that she didn’t want anything more than friendship, with Alex she wanted something more. Something so much more.

They had arrived at the coffee shop and Alex told her that if anyone asked, Bach was a service dog. Mack laughed lightly and nodded as they entered the shop. She looked around, deciding it looked pretty nice, and followed Alex to a place to sit. She was just being pulled everywhere. Usually she was the one doing the pulling so him taking the lead and leading her places was very welcome. She smiled at him and looked up at the menu a moment, having an issue with deciding on what she wanted. Then she turned to him, “You choose for me, I hate choosing things, especially if they’re all at least in a simple way delicious.” A smile crossed her face easily, one that she welcomed. She loved smiling at Alex or smiling because of Alex. She loved smiling these days. She loved feeling happy. She loved thinking about Alex instead of the things she normally thought about. Things that normally darkened her world. Ever since she started talking to Alex, Mack’s life had been a bit brighter and well… she wanted to keep it that way. Of course, there was the looming dread of facing Tommy and Nelson whenever she decided to head back to the tour bus, but she wasn’t going to worry about that now. She was going to enjoy the time she had with Alex because she was worried that she wouldn’t ever see him again.

Mack knew she couldn’t do that. She couldn’t go the rest of the summer without seeing him. She sighed, this time not even bothering to stifle it, and looked over at him, “I quit, that’s why I was standing outside the building I was supposed to be in. I quit,” she shrugged and looked down at her hands a moment; her hands that were fiddling with the sleeve of his jacket. The jacket that she was certain she never wanted to give back to Alex. Alex, the guy she was helplessly falling for. It was all so surreal, but she loved every bit of it. Mack looked back up again and smiled slightly, “I wasn’t joking when I said it was a long story, but I’m pretty sure it’s more complicated, than long.”

[Alexander Promise R7]

“Well no…I’m not really partial to fish…all they do is swim around and make faces at you.” Alex must have looked like an idiot then, because he looked at Mack with a fish face before he led her into the coffee shop. This was Alex, he was a total and complete dork sometimes and he was ok with that. He had his mature moments, and his immature moments. Hey, he was just…enjoying his life. There was nothing wrong with that right? Well, now especially he was enjoying his life. These moments with Mack were the best part of his summer so far. All summer long he’d been in a cage. Funny thing, an analogy like that, the Promise manor sits on hundreds of acres of land…and yet, Alex had felt caged. He had, of course, confined himself to his room, seeing as there was really no work to be done with the griffins this summer. The lack of new comers would mean stress all through the year, seeing as they would probably have to import griffins. Normally, the cubs were born in the summer, and trained and sold over the year. But this year, all the cubs had been purchased young, or well…not lived past a few weeks. It happened of course, and when you bred animals for a living you got used to it, but it was still not something you liked to see happen.

Alex glanced behind them for a moment to see Bach, contently sitting in front of their couch like a miniature guard…with a wagging tail and gigantic paws. Alex chuckled Bach looked over and stood up hopefully, as if Alex would throw him a toy or something. He was a smart dog but…for dogs, that wasn’t saying much. Alex had to admit though, having a puppy was a bit more fun then having a griffin cub to take care of. At least puppies didn’t have razor sharp claws and beak that could snap your fingers right off. Yes, there were definitely benefits to puppies. Why had Alex never had a normal pet before? Well, besides the cat, but that didn’t really count. Occasionally Alex brought Mozart to school with him, but after this last year, in which the piano playing feline had nearly devoured a tiny first years prized frog…well…Mozart would be content to stay at home…where he could chase all the frogs he’d like. Alex set aside his thoughts on animals and turned back to Mackenzie, only to find her looking at the menu. He just smiled at her, waiting, and when she turned back around to tell Alex to pick for her, he only smiled more. He nodded and looked up at the menu himself. If he was to pick for them, he hoped he would chose something good, because the truth was he had only ever been here once. This struck him as odd because he had remembered the place so well. Eh, that wasn’t all too strange an occurrence; he did it all the time. He remembered events well. This particular coffee shop held a rather fond memory of he and his sister and their father. The only snag in this memory…was that it didn’t exactly help him pick a drink; he had no idea what he’d gotten last time.

When he heard Mack sigh, he looked over at her. She quit? Could she do that? Well of course she could do that…I mean…anyone can quit their job…couldn’t they? Alex had never had a real job in his life, and he never intended to. He planned to just keep doing what he was doing. He enjoyed his father’s business and since he was the one into it, and not his sister, it would be only natural that it would come as part of his inheritance. His future was always set in that aspect. For as long as wizards in Greece needed griffins, Alex would have a job…and well…wizards in Greece had been using griffins for ages, why would that change now? Oh no matter. Alex followed Mackenzie’s gaze down and smiled softly as he watched her toy with the sleeve of his jacket. “Well…I have all night if you’d like to try and explain this complicated story to me eh?” For a moment, he considered taking her hand again, but instead he reached over, and pulled her in front of him. Placing his hands on her waist, he pushed her forward to the counter and leaned over her shoulder to smile at her. “I think I’ve decided what would be best.” He nodded and ordered two coffees. Two plain coffees…and I do mean plain for he specifically asked for there to be no whip cream on either. “Hate the stuff. Leaves a film in your mouth.” He nodded matter of factly and looked back at Mack, still standing behind her with his hands on her waist, smiling at her over her shoulder. Why he was so comfortable being this way with her…he had absolutely no clue. He wondered if it was right…how forward he was being with her…but decided that if it was a bad thing, if she wasn’t happy…she would let him know…or she would just never speak to him again. Either way he’d find out…though he hoped he wouldn’t have to. Not speaking to her, or upsetting her in any way…just the thought tied his stomach in knots. He didn’t like that idea. Not a bit.

[Mackenzie Holden]

Yes, he had all night. But did she? Mack bit her lip in thought a moment as Alex pulled her in front of him and pushed her forward a little bit, his hands on her waist. She smiled back at him softly and looked down, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear as he ordered. Plain coffee. That sounded good. She could drink it black if need be. She smiled when Alex explained he hated whipped cream, she honestly didn’t care much for the stuff unless it was on something fruity or chocolaty. She loved it on her hot cocoa during the winter time and when she had a fruit smoothie – there was whipped cream on that, too. It was a comfort topping for Mack, but she didn’t put it on everything. No, unfortunately she did that with salt. Mack bit her lip again and then leaned back against him, feeling completely comfortable with him. It was something that she was glad came so easily, because she needed something to be able to just enjoy these days. They stepped to the side so the next person could place their order and Mack looked at Alex, “You don’t want me to bore you with my musical career that was.” It was more like she was testing him. Seeing how interested in her life he really was. If he insisted he listen (but only if she wanted to tell because if he insisted and pressed on when she didn’t want to talk about it… well he’d just be nosy then wouldn’t he?) then he really wanted to know her as opposed to just pretending to want to know her with ulterior motives.

In all honesty, Mack didn’t know how much she was willing to divulge to Alex. There was a lot behind her reasoning to quit, half of it being she was tired of being tied down to G-Major and the other half of it was because of Tommy. For some reason, Mack didn’t want to tell him what happened between her and Tommy – she figured it was because it was like talking about an ex-boyfriend… which Tom Quincy was most definitely not, but still… it had that feeling connected to it and Mack wasn’t going to make their conversation uncomfortable. Or… at least… she wasn’t going to purposely do something that she knew would their conversation uncomfortable. And she thought that talking about Tommy? Yeah, that was most definitely a way for her to make the conversation uncomfortable – at least for her because she liked Alex… and well talking about kisses from ex-producers just didn’t cut it. So, right then, Mack made a rule for the night. No talking about ex-boyfriends or ex-producers or any ex-kisses, period. End of story. Right? Mack knew that if the subject were brought up, she wouldn’t lie – no matter how bad she wanted to. There was something about Alex, even in this short time of knowing him, that made her want to be completely honest. Honesty… could Mack even be honest?

It wasn’t like she was a pathological liar or anything… she just knew what to say to make people happy. She was in the music business, she had to know what to say to make people happy. There were also things that Mack had lied about so many times that she was just able to say it as if it were the truth. “No, my sister is not insane, she’s just on an extended vacation in London.” or “No, Mum, he didn’t come home last night…” when in fact Dixie really was insane and her father really had come the night before with some bimbo tramp on his arm. They were lies said so many times that they felt like truths and Mack knew that was terrible. But what could she do? Her life had been built upon lies. Lies were everything to the Holdens. Her mother thrived on half-truths and her sister thrived on complete and total fabrications. Mack’s whole life, she had thought, had been a lie and her father? Derreck? He was a lie in itself. Did that necessarily mean, though, that Mack could only tell lies? No. She knew she could be honest, Mack had been honest plenty of times in her life. Hopefully she had been more honest than she had dishonest, and if she hadn’t… well… that was pretty pathetic and a tinge terrible, she was sure.

At that precise moment (and to Mack’s gratitude) their coffees arrived. It ceased all mental ranting that Mack had been doing and she reached for both of the coffees, handing one to Alex. It was then that the realization that she had no money whatsoever hit her like a ton of bricks. She cringed noticeably and looked at Alex, “I don’t have any money, and I mean, I would sing for it… but…” she laughed slightly, looking down at the coffee in her hands, “… I think it’d be going against the whole ‘quitting’ thing.” Then the realization that he might actually want to pay for her hit her like a ton of bricks on top of the ton of bricks that had hit her only seconds before. She lifted the coffee to her lips and took a sip. Completely black. And it seemed to be fit for her mood. The mood that was deep down inside her at that moment while on the surface and in her heart she was completely content with just being there with Alex. There was the impending dread that kept lurking in the back of her head and in the pit of her stomach, though, and she couldn’t seem to force it down. “I’ll pay you back, every penny, I promise.” She offered him a weak smile and took another sip of the coffee.

[Alexander Promise R7]

Alex stood next to her again, slightly bothered that he wasn’t as close to her now. When she had leaned against him it was nice, he had even sighed happily, if not very, very quietly. He didn’t want to make it too obvious that he was completely falling for her. It was almost an unspoken rule when falling for a girl that you are to take things slow. Well Alex was finding it near impossible to go slowly but he was sure trying his hardest. It had started so fast, holding hands on the train that is. Oh and then she had kissed his cheek. Maybe he had just disillusioned himself that things were going fast, when in fact, she just considered him a good friend. How was he supposed to know if this was the case? Girls were so confusing, that was the problem. You could never really be sure if she liked you, or if she just thought of you as a close friend for the longest time. Maybe, after a great while, it would become more clear, but on the second date? Yeah, it’s really difficult. Wait, second date? Eh, just go with it. Right well, Alex had made a decision. He wasn’t going to be obvious to the point of being annoying or creepy, but he was going to do his best to make subtle moves, just to see where it went. That’s what moving her in front of him like that had been, subtle. Or at least…he hoped it was subtle. And what had she done? She had leaned against him. That could mean…well…nothing really. But he hoped it meant something.

Anyways, now that he was just standing near her, it didn’t feel right. He felt distant, like there was a wall between them and it was blocking him from getting to her. It was rather frustrating. But he tried to push past his frustration and listen to her. He prided himself on listening. “Oh you wouldn’t bore me.” He smiled and shrugged slightly. “I’d love to hear about anything you want to talk about to be honest. I enjoy talking to you Mackenzie.” He really did. He enjoyed talking to her to the point where he had invented conversations with her. He would lay in bed at night and let his mind wander off on tangents of how their conversations would go. Of course, in almost all of these they ended with Mack expressing her undying love to him and then him pulling her into a tight embrace...which obviously hadn’t happened as of yet and probably wouldn’t…for a while at least. Talking to Mack was a breath of fresh air for Alex. For being in Ravenclaw, and hanging out with almost all Ravenclaws, he found their conversations to be so dull. Not a single one of his friends had been able to keep his attention for more then five minutes lately. He just got bored. It was as if there was some mental block between them. Or maybe Alex was just sick of hearing about history reports. Nonetheless, talking to Mack was something he really enjoyed.

Finally their coffees came and Mack grabbed them both, handing one to him. He smiled thankfully at her and took his, holding it and just smiling at her for a few minutes as she sipped her coffee. Then she cringed and his smile dulled slightly. Money, he should have assumed it would come up eventually. This was another area where girls were confusing. Some girls, hated paying, and on a date, it was always the guys obligation to pay, that was that. Other girls though, felt bad if a guy paid. Normally this sort of attitude was present in a situation where the girl wasn’t considering the outing a date. This, for obvious reasons, bothered Alex slightly. But no matter, it was something to be expected, I mean…it wasn’t like they had verbalized the fact that this was a date…or at least…it wasn’t like Alex had verbalized the fact that he considered it a date. He had never asked her out or anything like that. He had made assumptions that she obviously had not. That’s ok he convinced himself. No problem at all. He smiled softly when she said she’d pay him back and then shook his head. “Nope. This is my treat. Plus, you don’t know how much the drink was.” He smirked and before she could look back at the menu, he took her hand and pulled her back to the couch. He realized he was pulling her a lot, and girls weren’t exactly things you were supposed to pull on…but it wasn’t like he was lugging her along, it was a gentle sort of pulling. Almost like…suggested moving. Yes, suggested moving. When the got back to the couch Alex sat down and patted the seat next to him.

[Mackenzie Holden]

Alex had said he enjoyed talking to her, and that was when Mack realized that was the second time that night he’d called her Mackenzie. She was rather shocked that she hadn’t picked up on it the first time he had called her it. Normally when someone called her by her full name she was quick to correct them. She was either Mack or ‘Kenze’ as she had been referred to recently by Trevor and co. but she was never Mackenzie. Well, not unless she was in trouble with Derreck and considering she never spoke to Derreck anymore there was no reason to be called Mackenzie. Though, in complete fairness to Alex, she had introduced herself as Mackenzie. She knew she did that because it was habit. It was how she introduced herself, it was the name on her album, it was the name she signed anything with; so it was in fact habit for her to say her full name. Now, as she realized he had called her by her full name, all Mack wanted to do was smile. She liked him calling her Mackenzie, and she had an idea why, too. It was as if they had a different relationship compared to everyone else who talked to her. And in a way, Mack felt like they did. She was so comfortable around Alex it was difficult not to feel like what they had was something different. Maybe Mack was reading too far into this whole thing. Maybe there was really nothing different there and she just wanted there to be. Neither of them had said anything completely out of the ordinary right? They had held hands on the train, and although Mack was fairly certain friends don’t hold hands, she wasn’t sure if he had done it because he liked her or because she was scared and then she intimidated him by holding his hand another time. Both of those scenarios were ones Mack wasn’t sure she wanted to contemplate, and yet they were the only things that had inhabited her mind. She always returned to that train ride whenever she was alone and thinking. She couldn’t help but feel like that train ride was the start of something incredible.

She smiled at him when he said she didn’t have to pay him back. Then he said she didn’t know how much the drink had cost and he must’ve anticipated her looking because before she could, he was leading her away from the counter. Mack smiled softly and looked down as they returned to Bach and their spot. Alex sat down and patted the spot beside him and with no hesitation, Mack sank down beside him easily, slouching low in the seat like she always did. Even with all the etiquette lessons her mother had forced upon her and Dixie over the years, Mack preferred her laid back and comfortable way of sitting as opposed to her mother’s uptight stick up your butt way of sitting. She had told Pam that once, too. And afterward she had felt bad for making her mother faint. Well, she pretended to feel bad. Pam fainted over everything these days, even the tiniest things. Pam was never one to be headstrong. She was always spineless, she needed to be lead. Never the leader always the follower, but she wouldn’t follow her daughters no matter how successful or intelligent they were. “A man is the ultimate source of success, Mack, you need to understand that as women we cannot live on our own.” Why yes, Mummy dearest, Mack had thought at that time, women are weak weak creatures and cannot survive without a big strong man by their side. Of course, a big strong man could also be their reckoning. Regardless of her mother’s spineless jellyfish ways, Mack had never taken to the etiquette lessons that were bestowed upon her and Dixie. She smirked to herself, imagining her mother’s face if she had been there right at that moment and seen how Mack was sitting. She would love to see it just one more time.

Mack tore herself away from her thoughts and looked over at Alex with a smile, “You’re sure you want to hear about it?” She knew the question was pointless because he’d answer yes, so without waiting much longer than long enough to take a sip of her coffee, she dove into the story. Her eyes closed and her head resting on the back of the couch they were sitting on, Mack found her comfort a steady stream of content, “I’ve been doing this music stuff since I was going into my fourth year. My first album came out the first couple of months of my fourth year, and then that summer I went on tour for the first time. It was fun at first, you know? Traveling the world, seeing the fans, signing autographs, stuff like that. It was a blast because… well… home sucked and touring was so much better than staying in dreary old London listening to Mum and Derreck fight all the time.” She paused here and took a deep breath, chewing on her lip in thought a moment. She didn’t know if she wanted to go into the whole Hanner business just yet. No. That could wait. She would just focus on her music career that had taken an abrupt end. “When I got back from tour, I had already started work on my sophomore album. I had about three songs written and ready for recording, but somehow in the middle of my fifth year – things took a terrible turn and I lost complete inspiration. I blame it on my ex,” she sighed slightly here as she thought about Jack and how his disappearance had completely ruined her desire to sing or write anything. Then she continued, “Tommy, my ex-producer, helped me get a bit of my inspiration back by helping me get over Jack. It was hard, but somehow I finished my second album toward the end of the year. Of course, something happened with Tommy and we ended up off speaking terms, so that put a strain on my music anyway.

“I told you on the train I was on tour, gave you tickets to the show I thought I’d give. Well, on our last night in England, I quit. I told Nelson, my ex-manager, that I didn’t want to be with G-Major anymore, and I quit. I agreed to finish off the tour like planned, but after that I wasn’t going to be recording anymore… and if I do plan on going back into recording that it won’t be with G-Major.” Mack opened her eyes and took another sip of her coffee before looking back over at him, “It got to the point, tonight, where I couldn’t think straight on stage. I had so much on my mind and there were places I’d rather be than on the stage and I realized that I just didn’t have the passion in me anymore to go through with it. So, in the middle of the song… I quit playing and walked off stage.” She had no intention of telling him that he was what was on her mind and that with him was the place she’d rather be. She didn’t know how that would go over. She was fairly certain it wouldn’t be something bad to say, but perhaps something foolish and Mack didn’t do well with foolish. She shrugged slightly and sipped from her coffee again, holding Alex’s gaze again before looking down at Bach instead. She was silent and then she said again, “I was contemplating quitting last year when I had no inspiration, but I just couldn’t find it in me to do. I came to the realization that it was mainly because I didn’t know who I was without music and if I did know who I was… she wasn’t someone I wanted to be. Now, that I’ve realized my passion for it’s almost completely gone… at least the fame of it anyway… there’s nothing left for me. I’m free to quit and,” she looked up at Alex again and smiled, “be me.”

Aware that she had completely told her not-so-long-and-(now that she thought about it, not so-)complicated-music-story, she bit her lip again before taking another sip of the coffee that was slowly becoming her friend and getting rid of any nerves she had. Talking to Alex was so easy and she wasn’t sure why, but she wasn’t one to question something she liked. Not unless she shouldn’t like it. Mack smiled at him after a moment, “Alright, I’ve told you my boring story. Tell me something about you, anything. Favourite colours, um… favourite book, band, movie, artist, or something like that. Something simple. Let’s start small.”

[Alexander Promise R7]

As Mack sank down into the chair next to him, Alex debating putting his arm around her. He wasn’t exactly sure why, it just seemed like the sort of thing you would do on a date. Then again, this wasn’t a date, and that wasn’t really the only reason he wanted to do it. It was becoming shockingly clear that being close to Mack was something Alex thrived on. If he wasn’t touching her, or close enough to her, he felt far away, separated, alone. He had felt that way all summer. Once again his mind touched back on loneliness. It struck Alex that maybe he had never felt loneliness before because he had never much cared for someone else’s company. He had never really had a best friend, he still wasn’t sure he really thought having a best friend was a logical idea. What did it do? Make you near dependent on another person? Then again…Mack was doing that to him anyways. But…it almost was different. He enjoyed the feeling he got when he felt like he needed Mack. He loved the feeling he got when he was around her. He knew that he wouldn’t be the same once she got back on that tour bus. Oh jeeze that moment would come far too soon. The second she would set foot on that bus he lose it, go back to being lonely and bored and…almost lost. Yes…lost…that was a good way to describe how he felt without her.

Alex pulled his conscious mind back to Mack and heard her ask if he really wanted to hear her story. He nodded. Of course he wanted to hear her story. Nothing sounded more appealing then learning about her. Learning about Mackenzie Holden was something he’d been trying to do since he got home after that day on the train. He had used all his resources. Internet, television…ok so those were really his only two resources…I mean…he didn’t exactly have a book about pop stars. Anyways, he had done all the searching for her he could, but he never found anything more then the basics. But even these bits and pieces he had swallowed up. He wanted to know her. He wanted to be able to tell her, her life story. To be that close to her, to be trusted by her to the point that she told him her deepest secrets. He wanted that. He wanted to be close to her. That was it. The easiest way to say it. Alexander Promise had a desperate need to know Mackenzie Holden. It wasn’t…stalkerish really. More…passionate. She was slowly consuming him and it felt absurdly natural. Like she was meant to consume him, meant to wrap him up in this blanket of interest. Ok, getting a bit to metaphorical now buddy…right. Anyways, he did, really, really, want to know her story. And so he watched her take a sip of her coffee and then plunge into that story. He listened intently, nodding occasionally where it seemed fit to nod. There were a lot of ex’s involved. Ex-managers, ex-producers, ex-boyfriends…at the mention of this particular ex Alex nearly choked on his coffee and had to fight back a particularly nasty bit of jealousy. That struck him as odd. Never before in his life had he been jealous in dealings with girls. But for some reason the idea of Mack possibly holding hands with…and maybe even kissing…ugh…another guy made him sense a particularly bothersome feeling in the center of his chest. He pushed past it however, and by the end of Mack’s story he had almost finished his coffee.

Alex had always had a problem with drinking coffee. Once he got started he couldn’t stop. He could down a whole pot of coffee if he was busy writing or thinking. It just…didn’t occur to him that he was doing it. He did this often. He did it with almost all drinks, and almost all food. He had once or twice chewed a pen cap into nonexistence as well. He just…couldn’t focus on physical things if his mind was running. He had a tendency to do foolish things if his mind was on a tangent. He couldn’t honestly say that he hadn’t danced up and down stair wells in the castle, or hummed random tunes and sang random scats as if no one knew he was there. He had a habit of falling into a state of personal nonexistence. He made himself invisible. It was almost a…out of body experience without ever really leaving his body. His body was a compartment, and his soul was a captive. His mind was trapped and so he would almost cave in upon himself and become absent in his own physical state of being. He could explore the vast possibilities of his own creativity and not be bound by the negativity his peers and teachers and relatives would shove upon him. It was…a complicated thing, this habit, but that was Alex for you.

When at last Mack’s story had completely finished she found it a good idea to ask him a question. What was his favorite…anything. Oh goodness, Mack really had no idea what she had gotten herself into this time. “My favorite? Well...hmm…I don’t really have a favorite anything.” He finished off the last of his coffee and then hummed for a second. “It’s so hard to pick favorite songs and movies and books and all those things you know? There are so many to chose from. I suppose my favorite color is blue…which…makes me even more of a Ravenclaw nerd eh?” He laughed lightly and then thought again. “And I could tell you what my favorite class is?” He stopped himself and laughed once more, shaking his head. “But that would only further classify me as a Ravenclaw nerd. Wow, stereotypes do fit don’t they?” That wasn’t entirely true. Mackenzie had yet to fit the stereotype ‘evil Slytherin’ thing. And he didn’t think she would. “I guess I’m kind of - Bach no!” Alex had finally had enough. The entire time Mack had been telling her story Bach had been nudging up, trying to fit himself into the spot between them. This of course, Alex could not allow and he had finally had enough. Looking rather disgruntled Bach turned and hopped up on the couch next to Mack, settling himself down and laying his head right up close to her lap. Alex laughed lightly again and shook his head, hoping she wouldn’t mind. “Sorry about that. What was I saying? Oh yeah, I guess I’m kind of complicated like that.” Alex was tilting his empty coffee cup around in his hand for a few moments before finally setting it aside on the coffee table and then reaching his now free hand to take Mack’s once more. Yet again a feeling of ease settled over him. “So how about you?” He said looking up at her. “I know you just told me a huge story, but what about favorites?”

[Mackenzie Holden]

Mack’s mind had returned to when she’d have to get back on the tour bus. She desperately didn’t want to get back on that bus, because she knew the moment she did so she’d feel this immediate sense of loss. Plus she’d have to put up with Nelson and Tommy. She wasn’t worried about Tommy – he wasn’t talking to her as it was, but Nelson would undoubtedly whine to her. Even with Nelson’s whining, Mack knew that she’d probably become a shadow of herself The idea that Alex, or leaving him, rather – could make her feel so alone was mind-blowing. But she knew that from their first meeting she had felt some odd connection to him. She imagined that if she believed in the soul mates thing – that it would feel something like Mack had felt upon their first meeting. It was hard to explain and Mack had given up on trying to explain it. She was just going to run with it. Run with the amazing feeling of being complete for as long as she could. Because if it was one thing Mack knew it was that life didn’t freeze for you. That most terrible thing could happen to you the moment you are most happy. Mack had yet to find the way around the tragedy of life’s harsh turns, but she did know the key to dealing with it. Don’t take anything good for granted. Cherish each memory because there can never be too many. So, it’s with these thoughts that Mack cherished the feeling she felt when she was with Alex. She had never really felt this way and it wasn’t a feeling she was willing to lose. She knew, though, that the moment she got onto the bus – the feeling of despair would return full force. She wasn’t looking forward to it in the least.

Hearing Alex speak, Mack broke herself from her thoughts and took another sip of her now luke warm coffee. Her blue eyes remained on Alex as he spoke. She smiled when he said his favorite color was blue and that just accented his Ravenclaw side. Houses. Mack’s smile dimmed a bit, but hardly at all. Mack hated how the school was split into 4 houses, mainly because of all the stereotypes that are usually wrong. Mack was a prime example of that. Yes, she was a Slytherin. No, she wasn’t terrible. She didn’t feel resentment toward muggle borns, muggles, or purebloods who associate with “lower bloods.” Mack apparently never got that Slytherin trait. Then again, Mack never believed that being a Slytherin meant you had to be mean. How had the sorting hat song gone? Something about being cunning and ambitious – nothing about being mean. Being a Slytherin wasn’t about being superior, it was about knowing where your place in society is and using it to your advantage. Mack remembered trying to explain that to Trevor once – but he just couldn’t grasp the idea that everyone was equal. There would always be the people who thought muggles, muggle borns, or “blood traitors” are below them, and Mack knew it. She just didn’t like it one bit. She took another sip of her coffee, her attention fully on Alex. Stereotypes. All Mack could do was smile at that or else she’d go on a rant. She wondered if Alex thought she fit into the Slytherin stereotype. She knew she had her moments, but she doubted Alex would ever se that type of moment. Or would he?

Alex had stopped midsentence to scold Bach who was trying to squirm up between them. She laughed lightly and petted Bach’s head as he sat down beside her. Mack moved closer to Alex, using Bach only as an excuse. He finished what he was saying and Mack smiled as she took another sip of her coffee. When he took her hand again, Mack smiled even more. She loved holding hands with him. She had to pull herself away from how much she loved her hand in his. It was a nice feeling, but he had asked her a question and she needed to answer him; not stare. “I have a lot of favorites. Favorite color is either green or a maroonish color – more of a dark red, really. Um…” Mack sipped at her coffee again as she thought, “ My favorite book was written by Mark Twain, but he’s not my favorite author is Mary Shelley.” She linked their fingers subconsciously as she continued to think more, “My favorite band is Nirvana but they’re tied with the Clash a lot of the time.” She wondered how odd she sounded, going on about every favorite of hers – and they were all muggle related. Was it weird to hear a Slytherin go on about muggle books and music? She knew that if anyone else had been going on – she wouldn’t think it weird at all. Not even if it was from a Slytherin. Then again, if anyone knew what was good music – they would know the muggles had it. Not that the Weird Sisters weren’t great, but… they didn’t have that spark the muggle bands did.

Mack looked down at the cup of coffee in her hand before finishing it off and setting it on the coffee table, “OK, Mister I Don’t Have Any Favorites. Tell me something about… hmm… well, about your life. We’ll make this easy for the both of us. You say something and I’ll tell you something about my life and soon we’ll know everything there is to know. Maybe. As long as neither of us lie.” She smirked, covering the racing heart in her chest. Telling Alex everything about her life was something she wasn’t looking forward to but something she knew was going to happen.

[Alexander Promise R7]

Alex grinned when Mack scooted closer to him, and he made a mental note to give Bach a treat later. That dog was good for something. Well…ok so maybe Alex was being over critical. He looked over at the dog as Mack petted his head. It was the absolute cutest dog that ever existed, he had to give Bach that. And despite his size he had a great temperament. Great guard dog and yet sweet at the same time. Then there was also the fact that Bach didn’t have razor sharp claws and a brutally dangerous beak. That was definitely a plus. Yes, the puppy had turned out to be a great pet and Alex surely wouldn’t trade him for the world. He wasn’t exactly looking forward to going back to school however; he couldn’t take Bach with him and that was disappointing. Alex had grown quite tired of cats and rats and owls and toads. The whole lot of them were rather bothersome animals. Alex had actually never understood why anyone would want a pet toad…at least cats and rats were semi-lovable…and owls delivered mail…but toads? They just sat there. What was the fun in that?

Alex was torn from his thoughts on pets, he had far too many of those thoughts, it was the animal lover in him. Anyways, Mack had begun talking and Alex’s full attention moved back to her. She was listing off favorites and Alex was making mental note after mental note of every word she said. He had to remember all of this stuff, he just had to. It was vital to know her favorites, he didn’t know why exactly, probably because he really liked her, but even if that case he surprised himself at his care. At that exact moment of surprise however, a sudden rush of fear enveloped him as well. It occurred to Alex, that while all the signs pointed to yes, there was not really any hard evidence that Mack liked him. Therefore, following this logical train of thought, Alex concluded that he could very well be making a fool of himself. He put so much effort into learning about her, getting to know her, and flirting past the healthy amounts, that Mack could very well be laughing at him behind his back. Well, technically…beside him…because his back wasn’t exactly turned…but you know what I mean. Alex held high hopes when it came to romance and it had made sense to him that such a fairy tale like he had frequently written could easily come true…but could it? Mack herself had said that she wasn’t sure she believed in all that true love stuff. Alex was still listening and memorizing everything she said though, he couldn’t stop himself. Even if Mack didn’t like him, wasn’t there a chance he could change that? Of course there was. Alex wasn’t about to give up on her, she had become the single most important thing to him in a matter of…well…hours if you count the total time they’d spent together. So finally Alex came to the conclusion, that even if she didn’t like him back, he wasn’t going to give up. Who knows, she could very well like him and he just didn’t know it. Alex resisted the urge to shrug at his own commentary.

Alex snapped back as Mack linked their fingers, and he grinned, immediately sliding his thumb on hers. It came naturally. Kissing her would probably come naturally too. He looked at her, she was smiling at him. She was really pretty, like…gorgeous…All in good time buddy…just be patient…how could she not fall for you? At that time? That made absolute perfect sense. Alex smiled back as she told him to tell her something about his life, and then he laughed lightly when she said that they’d know everything about each other as long as they didn’t lie. Oh how he wanted to know everything about her. “I would never lie to you, Mackenzie.” It was sort of just a side thought, but definitely one he wanted her to hear. Alex fumbled through thoughts about his life, wondering where to start or what to tell her and finally he settled on a subject that wouldn’t be a big deal for most, but it was to him. “I have a sister, a twin. Her name’s Chrys.” He smiled at Mack again before looking down at their hands. It was hard talking about his sister, especially since this was the first time he’d ever talked about her to someone from school. He knew it was wrong, rude, hypocritical, but it was just…hard. There was so much foul talk about muggles and muggleborns and squibs that I guess you could say Alex was a coward. He was rather afraid to mention his sister, because he was afraid to give someone the chance to talk badly about her, to talk badly about him. But here he was, about to tell Mack probably the biggest secret he’d ever had in all his life. His sister…wow…what a terrible secret. “She’s a squib. Goes to an all girls school. She likes it, s’never had any problems with her lack of magic. She’s quite content.” Alex smiled up at his and Mack’s hands, momentarily falling into a day dream where she would turn his face up and kiss him, but knowing that wouldn’t happen, he looked up on his own accord. He smiled at her and shrugged. Now it was time to see how she would react, and if all went well, what bit of her life she’d tell him.

[Mackenzie Holden]

“I would never lie to you, Mackenzie.” She didn’t know what to say to that. No one had ever told her they wouldn’t lie to her. She looked down at their hands and in that instant, she knew. She knew that what she was feeling was that feeling she had mentioned on the train. Perhaps not a true love, love at first sight, thing but there was something there – and Mack couldn’t deny it. No, in fact, she was starting to embrace it completely. Now, the only question that remained was whether or not Alex felt the same way. If he didn’t, she could live. It was something that Mack was prepared to deal with, besides that – what was the chance of seeing him again after tonight, anyway? And wasn’t that all the more reason to let him know how she felt? Well, yes, if you put it that way it made perfect sense – but Mack wasn’t putting it that way. Or if she started to, she didn’t think much into it. Not right now. Right now she was just going to enjoy it all as it was and maybe by the end of the night she’ll have the right mind to tell him how she felt or kiss him or whatnot. But not right now. She watched Alex intently, listening to his words like they were the only drink for miles and she was stranded in a desert. When he looked down, Mack caught the familiar look on his face and squeezed his hand. How many times had she had that look because of Dixie? She didn’t know what it was about his sister that made it so hard for him to talk about her, but she could tell it was a struggle. Mack tried not to talk about Dixie’s insanity, or her decision to confide in Adam before she confided in her own sister, but when she had to – she did it with a lot of difficulty or a serenity that was so beyond that certain topic that it often surprised her. It was a false serenity, though. She knew that much.

He spoke again, saying his sister was a squib, and Mack smiled at him; not saying anything until he was finished. She knew there was a lot of hateful people out there, purebloods like the Rendels or Mack’s family even, that would always look down on squibs or muggle borns. She knew, sadly, that if she had allowed Derreck to mold her mind into another perfect daughter – she would have raised her eyebrows at Alex, taken her hand from his, and walked off. It wasn’t something she was proud in admitting, but she knew it was the truth. The fact of the matter was, though, that Mack wasn’t raised that way. She was treated like she was lower than the lowest and that in itself made Mack easier to get along with than most of her family. Dixie, now in her new sense of personality, would have stayed but she wouldn’t ever bring up the subject again – however, the Dixie three years ago would have made some snide comment and taunted. There is a reason why Dix was a Queen of Slytherin, and there’s a perfectly good reason why she left, too. So, maybe the Holdens weren’t really as bad as Mack was making them out to be in her mind. Pam with her eager to please attitude wouldn’t have said anything bad to the person’s face, but the moment she left she would agree with every harsh word spoken by a more… outspoken person. Derreck was the terrible Holden, but then again he had been a follower of the Dark Lord for years and years before Dixie was born. What was there to expect? Mack mentally shrugged and returned to the conversation, “You and your sister are close, then? I mean, being twins and all? I don’t have a twin and me and my sister are far from close, but I hear that having a twin is kinda… a tighter bond than just a regular sibling bond.”

…me and my sister are far from close. How true was that anymore? Sure, Dixie never told her anything about what made her go insane, she had decided to tell Adam that instead – but Dixie was really starting to open up to Mack more and vice versa. They were growing closer, and sure they both got on each other’s nerves like there was no tomorrow, but Mack suspected that would never change no matter how close they got. They were just two completely different people. Mack frowned a bit in thought of her sister, wondering when she would be returning home. Having Dixie away in Paris had been hard for Mack, even though she wouldn’t ever admit it. She did miss her sister, she had missed her the moment she got on that plane but she knew Dixie had to go. It was for the best and if it wasn’t for the best, there was no harm in doing it that was for sure. Bach brought Mack to the present by nudging her leg with his head, and she looked down at him before looking over at Alex again, “Right, something about me. Hmm.” She sighed in thought, there was so much to tell but all of what she wanted to tell was so complicated. The easiest thing to talk about would be Jack and she really didn’t want to talk about Jack with Alex, it was like the ‘don’t talk to your new boyfriend about your old boyfriend’ rule, except… Alex wasn’t her new boyfriend. No matter how bad she wanted him to be. “Well, I thought I was half blood for a good portion of my life.” She looked guilty a moment and then laughed pathetically at herself, looking down at their hands.

“You’ve got to understand my father before you understand anything about this. Derreck Holden is…” Mack closed her eyes in thought, “Let’s just say he got around. A lot. I mean, I have like at least three half siblings out there somewhere and I’ve met one of them. He was never faithful to my mum and she never really cared, you know? As long as she had a place to live. So, somehow, with the way I was treated when I was younger I suppose, I got this idea that I wasn’t really my mum’s daughter. I look nothing like her, anyway, I’ve got blonde hair, she’s got brown. Much like my sister. I was going through some things in my house one day and came across a box full of photos and letters and such from a Krista Hanner. The woman in the pictures had blonde hair and in the letters she was talking about having a baby girl and stuff like that. I guess, I allowed my imagination to run away from me.” That was an understatement. “And so, I walked around with this knot in my stomach because I didn’t really know if I was the baby the woman talked about in her letters or not. When my mum got remarried after her divorce from my father, she married Hank Laurie who’s this really powerful guy in Manchester… pureblood, but he doesn’t support the dark arts… I think that’s the only place him and my father really differed. Hank had a son, Trevor, who’s our age and Trevor had heard me talking to Jack about this whole Hanner/Holden mess and he decided to pull a stupid joke on me. He found a way to make me believe I was Molly Hanner and that I had a sister Madilyn who lived somewhere else.” Mack rolled her eyes, feeling the stupidity burn her face.

She looked at Alex again and shrugged, biting her lip, “I found out only awhile ago that I am really Mackenzie Holden, completely pure… unfortunately. Trevor was rather remorseful, but who wouldn’t be once they realize they really care about their step-sister who they pulled a trick on?” She sighed a bit and rested her head back, looking up at the ceiling, “You practically know my whole life story now. I have to think of something else to tell you, now that you know all of my interesting tid bits” She smirked and looked over at him, having a sudden urge to kiss him but restraining herself.

[Alexander Promise R7]

Alex let out an audible sigh when Mack didn’t say anything about his sister. The fact that she didn’t even seem to show any care at all was one better though. And the fact that she didn’t stop holding his hand? Or scoot away from him? Amazing. Alex had never assumed he would get that reaction from anyone, and especially not a Slytherin. Oh goodness, Alex had a problem. He didn’t mean to do it, but he was sadly, a follower of stereotypes. Obviously, he didn’t just stop talking to someone because of their house, but he did have preconceived notions. Mack for example, was a Slytherin, and that had started Alex off on the assumption that she was going to be lousy to him. That she wouldn’t like him, or would think he wasn’t good enough. He had assumed she would turn out to be one of those pureblood, rich, spoiled, brats that the Slytherin house seemed to boast in having the most of. Ok he’d admit it, he had taken an interested in her right of the bat because…well…she was pretty. He wouldn’t deny it if asked; the first thing he had noticed was her looks, but then again, that was the first thing he’d seen though right? After that however…as they talked on the train, and held hands, he had felt something. He didn’t know anything about her, but he was drawn to her. He needed to be around her, to be close to her, to touch her in some way. He needed her presence or the world didn’t seem right. What do you call that? That, is more then just physical attraction. That’s something more. That’s a desire that’s deeper then looks and even…deeper then personality. That’s a desire that’s…full. A well rounded desire. Would that work? Alex was trying to make sense of his feelings in the few moments he had in between when Mack asked him a question, and he would open his mouth and speak. He wasn’t thinking at all about her question, it was one he’d gotten so many times, he was just trying to figure out the funny feeling in his chest. It wasn’t a bad feeling, it was a good feeling. Like someone attached a chain right to the center of his chest and was slowly pulling on it. He felt drawn forward, but more then that he felt drawn to Mack. He let the puppet master pull him.

“You could say it’s a tighter bond then other siblings I guess…mostly because we’ve been with each other through everything you know?” Alex shrugged and looked up at Mack again. “She has a tendency to know what I’m thinking and finish my sentences if that’s what you mean?” He looked thoughtful for a moment, before continuing. “I think… the twin bond thing? Is more…created by our own minds? I mean…when you have a best friend, you get to know each other so well that you think you’re able to read each other’s mind…but you’re really just…fitting your thoughts to work the same way the other’s do? Goodness I’m making no sense.” He stopped and laughed lightly. “What I mean to say is, I think we have a close bond because we try to have a close bond. It’s an effort on both of our parts but really…we’re just really good friends you know? Really good friends who do occasionally want to bite each other’s heads off.” He grinned and looked at Mack expectantly as he asked her to tell him something. When she began, he was utterly lost. That was at first of course. I mean…you can’t blame him. The concept of ‘thinking’ that you were half blood for only half your life implies that you are not really half blood, and obviously there’s a story behind you thinking that. Therefore, Alex happily settled in for a story. Listening to Mackenzie was exactly Alex’s cup of tea. Alex liked stories, he enjoyed when people confided in him, but he liked it more that it was Mack. He enjoyed everything more with Mack. Sure, he loved to have coffee with friends, but having coffee with Mack? Five times greater. Casual conversation with friends was great. Casual conversation with Mack was special. Things were just…different with Mack.

When Mack finished her story, Alex did a mental recap. So let’s see… She had a mother, a father, and a sister by birth. She also had a stepfather, and a stepbrother. Through a mixture of imagination, confusion, and a strange practical joke, she had been convinced and then believed, that her birth mother…was not her real mum. Alex watched as Mack’s facial expression changed to a more frustrated look. He couldn’t blame her, something like that would tear Alex to shreds. He wouldn’t deal well with that sort of mix up. Alex smiled again as Mack looked at him and told him she’d told him her life story. He knew that of course, that wasn’t true, I mean…there had to be more to her life…but he didn’t say anything, he just laughed lightly. Normally, Alex was the funny one. He made funny little comments and his little gaggle of friends laughed…Alex rarely laughed at other people, but Mack made him laugh. She made him happy, and chuckle-y. She just put him in an all around good mood. Again, the time had come for Alex to tell Mack something about him. He went through all the things he could tell her but he was at a loss. Sure, he could tell her about his father’s business, about griffins and such, but at the time…that just seemed so dull. Hah, training griffins dull…wow…that was a funny thought. Anyways, Alex’s mind was going at fast-forward speeds…don’t hold it against him for being a bit…jumbled in his head. Anyways again, back to Alex telling Mack something. He was trying to decide which would be best, but for some reason or another, (maybe, if things worked out well, you could call it divine intervention) Alex’s mouth opened, and words just…came out. “Well…I write? And I’m a hopeless romantic. But I never really believed real romance could happen in real life. I kinda thought it was mostly for stories and such…but then I met this girl and she kinda turned my world around.” He laughed lightly, sliding his thumb on hers again, a bit slower, more thoughtfully. He finally looked over at Mack and smiled softly. “She’s really great. I sort of just met her a bit ago? But I really like being around her, she’s definitely my favorite person to talk to that’s for sure.” He looked a bit nervous if for only a second. His words had finally registered with his brain and it hit him that he was telling her about how he felt about her. He had to…oh he didn’t know what he had to do. He had to relax, that was it…just let it go. “She has a bad habit of trying to pay for her own coffee though.”

[Mackenzie Holden]

Mack listened to Alex talk about sibling bonds and she found herself reflecting back on Dixie. She wondered if her sister thought about her nearly as much as Mack thought about her. Of course, that’s probably a no. Dixie never really cared much about what happened to Mack, because for the majority (if not all) of her life she was taking care of herself and protecting herself from her sister or Derreck. But Mack knew she worried about Dixie possibly too much. Well, could you worry about Dixie too much? The girl who spent months in an institution because she had retreated into another world of her own in her mind? The girl who could manipulate you with a look? Probably not, but Mack sometimes felt like she did worry too much. Besides, she hadn’t worried about Dixie before her mental breakdown in her 5th year, why start now? Oh, right… Mack had actually started to care about her sister. Great. Mack looked at Alex when he said he wasn’t making any sense and she shook her head. He was making sense, she knew exactly what he was saying. She offered him a small smile, wondering how she knew exactly what he meant when he said it, because she had never had that kind of bond. Not even Jamie who she had been best friends with for years. He had never really made any effort to really understand Mack and she had been perfectly fine with that. Mack had hated being understood, but now… she wondered how she would take it if she was given the chance.

After she had finished her story and told him he knew her whole life story, he laughed lightly and she knew what he was thinking. Was that all of her life story? Mack thought a moment. He knew about her music and about her blood mix up. What else was there to tell? She could tell him little details like about her friendships with Jamie and Jack and Tommy and… were all her friends guys? Yes, they were. She hadn’t one girl friend. Except Mary and they were more acquaintances than friends because Mary came from the stereotypical Slytherin background and Mack came from one slightly different. Mary had views that Mack didn’t agree with and vice versa, but still Mary and her had been friends since third year and Mack was pretty sure she could talk to her about anything…minor, anyway. It was a definite that Mack’s best friends had been guys. Jamie was her first, then Jack, then Kris, and now? Now, Mack wasn’t quite sure who her best friend was. She lifted her free hand and tucked her hair behind her ear, dragging herself back to the present. She looked at him as he spoke about romance, her eyes searching his face. Then he continued talking, about a girl he had met… a girl that had turned his world around. Mack nodded slowly and tried not to feel too incredibly foolish. He liked someone else. That was… expected. After all, what could he have possibly seen in her, Mackenzie Holden? She was… a lot of things that weren’t so great. Mack’s breathing had slowed considerably and she was on the verge of taking her hand from his. If he liked someone else, after all, they shouldn’t be holding hands. Should they? Mack started to pull her hand from his when he spoke again.

“She has a bad habit of trying to pay for her own coffee though.” What did he say? Mack looked at him, her breathing completely stopped now. Either he was saying he liked her, or he was saying that there was another girl who wanted to pay for her own coffee; which was completely plausible. Somehow, though, she didn’t think that was it. She continued to look at him, her eyes searching his, and then without much thought except for she couldn’t think of what to say, Mack leaned over and kissed him. She hadn’t really thought how it would affect her, because all she could think about was how bad she had wanted to kiss him and if she couldn’t tell him how she felt through words she would have to do it through her lips. This kiss was completely different than the other kisses she had in her life. It was different than her first kiss, and it was different than her kisses with Jack, and it was most definitely different than her kiss with Tommy. This kiss sent a chill down her spine, and made her completely stop breathing. It wasn’t like she had ever experienced before and she embraced the feeling she got from it. When she broke the kiss, she immediately became struck at what she did. “Oh… I…”

Had she just kissed him? Why, yes she had. Did she regret it? No, she didn’t. But now she didn’t know what to say or what to do. Her face was still close to his and when she realized this, she sat back slightly, looking bewildered at herself. Where had that come from? It didn’t matter. She sat there a moment and then smiled and shrugged, “I’ve got to say that I’ve been wanting to do that for awhile…”

[Alexander Promise R7]

Alex could feel a definite change in Mack when he started talking. And he knew exactly more. The way he had said it, it was meant to sound like he had fallen for another girl all the way up until the last bit. It had worked. Alex felt her go to pull her hand away and he held it tighter. He didn’t want her to take her hand away; she hadn’t heard him out all the way. And so he shoved out his last comment in desperate hopes she would make the connection. He needed her to make the connection; he needed her to know that he was spilling his soul about his feelings for her…well…not all of them actually. Just the top layer. He could delve into the inner most workings of his mind and heart, but that would be a bit much for this situation right now. He was sure though, eventually he’d tell her it all. She looked at him them, she wasn’t breathing, and neither was Alex. Sometimes, you hold your breath because doing so, makes it seem like time is stopped. As long as you can hold your breath you can make sure that nothing around you interferes, it’s like…a safety precaution. Of course, that wasn’t true. Holding your breath for long periods of time wouldn’t stop time…you’d just go blue in the face. But it made it feel that way. And feeling that way is what matters. Their eyes locked again, and Alex thought and thought and thought all the thoughts he could about liking her. About how she had become so important to him. As if thinking hard enough he could send it to her mind through their eyes.

Finally, the thing Alex had been envisioning all evening happened. She kissed him. It was completely…mind numbing. Alex stopped thinking completely, or at least, he stopped knowing what to think. He kissed her back, holding it out for as long as she did, and then when she broke it, he felt like he had fallen back to the earth and landed with a loud thud. He blinked a few times and even shook his head slightly, trying to get his bearings on where he was again. Only her voice snapped him back to reality. At first, she seemed confused too, like she didn’t know what she had done. And then she sat back in the seat and Alex took the liberties of scooting closer to her. He had finally come to the conclusion that she really had just kissed him. And that was pretty much the deciding factor. Either she liked him, or he was going to make her like him. He would not live without another one of those kisses. Without holding her hand. Without her. Finally Mack smiled, and it felt like a weight had been lifted off Alex’s chest. He smiled too, and then grinned when she spoke. So she had been wanting it too eh? “I’ve been wanting to kiss you since you left me on the train.” He just…said it. You know that little voice in your head that says… ‘don’t say that’? Yeah? Alex’s was gone. Instead there was that little voice that said ‘Doooo it! You wont!’. A challenge can get you to say pretty much anything. He was grinning now, and he took her hand, playing with it, occasionally looking up at her. “You know…thinking about you and when you were gonna be in Scotland completely inhabited my summer?”

He didn’t really know…what…to say now. That kiss had left him…almost speechless. Leaving Alex completely speechless was hard. But…he had a good feeling Mack could do it. Alex was…lost in thought. He was trying to think of something to do, something to say. It was proving to be really very difficult. Alex looked over at Bach, who seemed to not even notice the kiss had taken place. He was still neatly cuddled up against Mack’s leg. Alex reached a hand up and scratched his head, looking down and Mack’s hand and then over at her. “I don’t know if it’s weird to like you this much Mackenzie…since we’ve only met and talked once before…but…I honestly can’t get you off my mind and I really don’t want to.” He scratched his head again and looked thoughtful. “I guess I’ve been trying to tell myself that you’re probably not interested in me. Or maybe that I shouldn’t be interested in you because we haven’t known each other for long? But…I think I really just don’t care.” He nodded matter of factly. He smiled at her for a while, wondering what she would think of him. He was just…talking. He was talking to much but he didn’t know what else to do. Part of him wondered if maybe he had said to much, but the other part was just screaming at him not to care. I mean…if she felt the same way, it wouldn’t matter. If she didn’t…it still wouldn’t matter what he had said because he had been being honest. Of course, Alex was really hoping she felt the same way and she hadn’t just kissed him for the thrill of kissing someone. Finally he lifted her hand and kissed it, the same way he had that day on the train and he smiled and shrugged. “So I suppose…it’s your turn to tell me something about you eh?”

[Mackenzie Holden]

Mack knew that there was no note, no chord, no beat, not anything musical that could match how she felt during that kiss. That kiss was pure magic in itself. Not the kind of magic that she went to school for, but the kind of magic that you only find in something completely perfect - something completely pure. It was the kind of magic you found in something so strong and so meant to be. It was the kind of magic that Mack never thought she would ever feel. The kind of magic she was certain only existed in fairy tales or in the songs she wrote. The kind of magic that she had seen but never felt. It was in that kiss that Mack started to believe. She started to believe in that 'love at first sight', 'meant for each other' thing that she and Alex had discussed on the train that day. Of course, she couldn't say that she loved Alex because that was a huge step and she didn't even think she could feel love, but she could say that after that kiss she believed that two people could make a strong connection in one meeting. They had made one after all, hadn't they? They had made a connection over a deadly trunk and a frightening jolt of the train. They had talked and gotten to know each other a little bit. They had established a friendship. That was a connection, wasn't it? Mack wasn't so sure because she had never really made a connection with anyone before - not over a first meeting. So, perhaps this was one of those meant to be things. Not, necessarily, an eternity type of meant to be but still a meant to be. Mack liked the idea of that. She liked the idea of the feelings she was feeling being meant to be. It made it all seem a lot more logical.

So, as Mack thought about all of this, Alex was talking. He had said he wanted to kiss her since she left the compartment on the train. Mack smiled and looked down at that. She knew that she would have loved to kiss him, but she also knew she hadn't been thinking about anything like that. It was nice to know, though, that he had wanted to kiss her as well and that it wasn't just a foolish thing for her to do. Weird? Well, yes, that was a way to put it. Who in their right mind would like Mack anyway? But she knew that wasn't how he meant it. He had meant it in the sense that it had been such a short amount of time. Mack had actually thought about that often, but she didn't say anything. She let him continue talking, her eyes never leaving his as he spoke. When he ended by saying he really didn't care how long they had known each other, Mack smiled so brightly she was certain she hadn't ever smiled as bright as that before. Again, though, Mack still didn't say anything. She didn't know what to say. She was enjoying hearing him tell her these things. Mack had a feeling that she could sit and listen to him talk about anything for hours upon end. She suddenly had this flash of them sitting beneath a tree at school, eating some fruit and just talking randomly about things that pop into their heads. 'Ever wonder why they call it an apple?" she'd ask. And he might laugh and shake his head or give some funny remark, and they'd lapse back into a comfortable silence.

She pulled herself from her thoughts and looked at him again when he kissed her hand and said it was her turn to tell him something. Mack smiled softly and looked down at their hands in thought. After a couple minutes of silence, Mack looked back up at him; "I'd very much like to kiss you again. Truth is, I'd very much like having the possibility to kiss you whenever I want to. You've been all I can think about. I've written, or tried to rather, songs about what I've been feeling and thinking. You've completely consumed me and I'm perfectly fine with it, where regularly I'd be completely frightened by it." Mack paused here a moment to gather her thoughts, looking down at their hands again. There it was; the perfection, the naturalness, of their hands. She was close to getting lost in her thoughts again, so she pulled herself back; "I've never, not once, felt like this. And it's not... it's not weird," she looked up at him again, her thoughts riddling across her eyes as she spoke, "but it's not common either. Not for me. It's uncommon to find someone that I just instantly feel this connection with, someone I feel this strongly for. It usually takes years. And at first... it scared me, a lot. Because I've never felt this way this quickly." Mack smiled slightly and let her eyes travel over his face before continuing, "In short, I do like you, and I'm perfectly content with that."