Little Devil on my Shoulder ((Flo))

[cleo]

Cleo grimaced lazily: „Mutilating your toes you mean. What makes a person to do somekind of a sport that can hurt you? Alright, playing some ball-game or riding I understand. If you fall, then it’s an accident and a one-time deal. But I seriously would like to understand what makes people practice ballet years, while it’s known it’s hurtful for your toes and feet on the whole!
As for leotard... that’s not bad now. Leotard can look rather fetching if worn out properly. Most things can be made look good on the correct figure with a good posture, some grace and elegance and enough character to not care what others might think.“

Cleo pondered about it a bit. She had hated dancing-lessons as a kid. Her grand-parents had forced her to take them while they had still hoped to turn Cleo into a proper little doll they oculd marry off to some rich pureblood and in that way restore their long-spent family-fortune. Hadn’t really happened. They had buried the idea after Cleo got caught the first time trying to shoplift. Her long-gone days of trying to become a good criminal. Two very unsuccessful tries had told Cleo that she would never be a good thief or a burglar.
„Learned ball-room myself actually. Grand-parents orders. Hated every minute of every lesson. But I am grateful for them now. Taught me agility and some grace while moving around. Without it I might most likely be walking into doors and falling constantly. And it introduced me to the pleasure of wearing heels. Something I will forever be grateful for.“

[Flo Murvac H4]

What she just said made sence. This was the thought that first crossed Flo's mind. Why did she do Ballet? She knew after awhile that her toes would hurt. Maybe she didn't want to quit. Maybe she wanted to show that she wasn't a quitter. "Well thats half the reason why I left. I knew that it would be painful to my feet, but i didn't kow it was going to make my feet blister and stuff. But, I'm still glad that i did join up for classes. It was fun!" Flo shrugged her shoulders. It was fun. She had made lots of friends.

Flo smiled as Cleo was talking about how grateful she was that she had got put into ballroom dancing, and had gotten the pleasure of wearing heels. Flo didnt wear heels much. Her feet were still recovering from ballet.

[cleo]

„Half the reason why you quit ballet? What was the other half?“ Cleo asked curiously as she shifted on the couch to make herself be more comfortable, „If you don’t mind me asking. If you do mind me asking, then just don’t answer, cause I have already asked. Cleo arched a lazy eye-brow at the cheerfullness Flo was displaying. Was she always this patient and appeared so cheery? It could get lonely this way. If you always smiled, always danced – then people got used to it and expected you to be always cheery. It was the same with crying. People cried. Every day someone was feeling sad and crying. But if you saw a strong character, someone who usually was so composed and strong, break down in tears or loose all fate – then it shocked you. It shook the very core of the small individual world you were living in and made the tears mean so much more as such tears of sadness were rarely shown. Curious really.

„Doesn’t it get tiring or lonely to be always smiling?“ Cleo asked abruptly from Flo giving a small knowing smirk, „My whole world twirls aorund me for the very simple reason – if I didn’t exist my whole world didn’t exist. But doesn’t it wear you out to always display such cheery front to everyone? If I laugh I laugh for a reason. For something that makes me truly happy. But if you laugh all the time, then doesn’t it rob the charm of laughter? If you are always feeling 100% happy and up beat, then doesn’t it lessen your joy in the long run? Life isn’t easy for a reason.“

[Flo Murvac H4]

Flo knew that Cleo would ask about the other half. She seemed like that kind of person. It was a simple answer. "I came to Hogwarts. Mum thought about still taking lessons on the holidays and stuff, but dad said no. I still don't know why, but i didn't mind." Flo told Cleo as she played with a bracelet.

Flo watched Cleo's face as she asked her if she got lonely from smiling and being cheery all the time. She was smirking, and it looked like she was trying to be rude or something. "Well, i feel cheery, because i want to be. People think I'm much more easier to approach, because I'm smiling. If i was mad or gloomy all the time, people might not talk to me.But even if they didn't, well thats their opinion. I'm cheery, because i like to enjoy life, and not spend all of it walking around, feeling like no one likes me. But thats who I am." Flo stopped playing with her bracelet and waited to see what Cleo was going to say.

[cleo]

Cleo thought. She seriously though about Flo’s answer trying to understand the logic in it. Perhaps she even understood part of what Flo was saying and the other she didn’t. Looking calmly at Flo, Cleo tried to phrase the questions about what she didn’t get: „People talking to you... but if you want to be alone? Want some privacy and peace and quiet so you could sort out your own thoughts? I talk to people, even have my own friends,“ almost subconcsiously Cleo glanced towards the lounge door rubbing the spot on her forehead wher eone of the horns had been, „And I don’t want to befriend anyone. For me friendship is more cherised than that. I don’t want to talk to the biggest bullies in Slytherin or the biggest hotheads in Gryffindor. And I enjoy my life. I adore my life and I don’t sulk. I know that I like me, that my mother would have liked me and that’s enough for me.“

Cleo looked at Flo almost trying to will the other girl to understand her point. She honestly didn’t know how to phrase her words better: „It’s just... I don’t want to associate with just anyone. But if I go around smiling at everyone, then maybe those people I don’t want to know for whatever reason that might be, will not come to talk and try to befriend me?“

[Flo Murvac H4]

Flo tried to understand Cleo's answer. She kind of got it. But Flo was sure, that whatever Cleo was trying to say, was making sense. Just not to Flo. She didn't mind. She thought of what Cleo had said, and had sought of understood it. Flo knew that sometimes, you can have something that makes sense to you, that people completely don't understand, or that what you want to say, you don't have the words to say it. That happened to Flo sometimes. It probably happened to everyone, but Flo wouldn't know, she was probably too busy trying to figure out what they were saying.

"So, what your saying...well, at least, what I think what your saying, Is that, you don't really care who likes you or not? That you just live life to the full..or how ever you want it to be?" Flo wasn't sure if thats what Cleo had meant, but it was worth a guess. Everyone guesses, you cant be right all the time. Flo rested her head on her hands, waiting for Cleo's answer, while thinking that Flo would be wrong or something about what she told Cleo. She usually was.

[cleo]

Cleo snorted and shook her head: „As much as I’d like to say I don’t care what other think of me – unfortunately it’s not true. Everyone is influenced by the people and the world around them, so the opinion of others DOES matter. But if I have to choose – then for example the opinion of my friends in Ravenclaw matters to me more than let’s say your opinion. So the freedom to make such choices – who I do are about about and who I don’t – is what makes my life full. However you seemed to have missed the point of my question. Not that I actually know how to word it correctly.“

Dana let her head fall back as she absent-mindedly watched a young 2nd year wolfing down chocolate as if it a gift from heaven. Grimacing at the sight Cleo turned away but it had given her an example.
„Well, let’s say you like chocolate. Or whatever sweet. It is your favorite food and then one day you get the happy news that you can eat it as much as you want every day. You’re happy for the first couple of days. Maybe you’ll last a week while eating chocolate, but by then you are craving for something other, you don’t want chocolate anymore. Isn’t it the same with laughter? If you laugh too often, too easily, too much, then doesn’t it take away from the value of laughter? Doesn’t it take away the point of laughter, because you use it so often that it doesn’t matter to you anymore? You have used laughter too much to fully enjoy it anymore – like you can eat so much chocolate that you don’t want to see an other piece of chocolate for months to come. I don’t know if you understand what I’m trying to say, but,“ Cleo didn’t fnish the sentence, just shrugging instead just looking at Flo a bit pensively.

[Flo Murvac H4]

Flo frowned. She knew that she was wrong. But as Cleo explained about chocolate, Flo started to understand. It was actually a good way, of putting an example. It had made Flo understand that being happy and cheery all the time, can take away the meaning and value, as Cleo had explained it as. "Ok, I understand it now." But, even if it did take away the value of laughter, Flo probably wouldn't stop laughing, or smiling, or being nice. It was, just who she was.

"So," Flo decided to try to change the confusing subject. Making Flo think too much, was probably not a really good idea. But Flo couldn't think of anything to say. So she looked around the room, and saw Dana again. "How many times have you been hexed, and Dana has helped? You said that you owed her alot. Not that I'm trying to be nosey or anything..."

[cleo]

Cleo arched a lazy eye-brow as the girl didn’t reply. Was she just wordless? Or did Cleo’s words make some impact on her? Turning her head lazily Cleo glanced at Dana as well as she was talking to Ryan who was most likely in trouble with his homework again. While the boy was rather fun and not exactly an idiot either, he enver seemed to get his work done at the right time by himself.
„How many times? I don’t know exactly. Well, I met Kris about a months into the school-year so it has been about 2 months. We have such run-ins where we jinx each other about 2-4 times per week. Dana has helped me do research or loaned me books or given me any ideas what Kris might have used on me for about 90% of such occasions. Not to mention random help while discussing my homework with me. She has became a rather good friend, even though she tends to find it increasingly amusing to watch me and her cousin bicker. Most of the other people in the school don’t pull their wands at me I have to admit.“

Cleo stood and stretched luxoriously smirking as he could see Kris’s form passing by the door to the Student Lounge at the same moment as some 2nd year was entering the room.
„Now, as pleasant as this has been, I’m afraid I must be moving on now. Have an unschedualed appointment to get to,“ Cleo smirked almost maliciously already thinking about which jinx to use on Kris this time as she nodded to Flo, „It was a pleasure to meet you. Perhpas we’ll run into each other some other time as well. Catch you later.“
Raising her arm in a sort of good-bye Cleo walked rather hurriedly to the door, slipping out of the room her wand already found so she could use it at any given moment as she went to catch up with Kris.

((I liked this post immensely.  We should repeat the experience this time, but I was starting to get the feeling that this post had pretty much given all it would.))